From Newsgroup: uk.media.radio.archers

Just something to brighten up your day / evening / night.

I registered with HMRC a few months ago so that I might carry out on-line submissions for my tax. The app has always been rCyflakeyrCO to say the least and some days, I could open the app but others, it would not allow me at
all. Getting a little widdled off with this situation and when invited, I decided to reset my password and go through a long procedure to prove I am
me and am alive etc.

Having used Gov UK to ascertain I exist in the past, I was then invited to prove my existence using this app. My only means of rCyproofrCO is my passport (which was purchased a few years ago solely for the purpose of proving my existence and has never been used for anything else!) I went through the rigmarole of providing my NI number, DOB, colour of toenails, name of
hamster etc., I was then requested to take a photo with my iPhone of the
photo page of my passport and , having told them my passport has the
embedded chip in the front cover, was then invited to scan this to confirm information.

My passport photo page shows my correct details - so far so goodrCa scan the chip and it comes up with a page of data stating I was born in 2047!
Needless to say, though I have tried ten or more times to pass this
procedure to enable me to progress to HMRC app, I just see rCySomething went wrongrCO type messages - however and which ever way I try to pass go and collect -u200, it would seem impossible to make any progress!

I am currently waiting for Gov Uk to resolve this, but, I suppose I may
have to wait until I exist in 2047 for a reply! Ho-Hum.
--
Toodle Pip, Mike McMillan
--- Synchronet 3.22a-Linux NewsLink 1.2

From Newsgroup: uk.media.radio.archers

Jim Easterbrook <news@jim-easterbrook.me.uk> wrote:

On Wed, 10 Jun 2026 16:19:59 -0000 (UTC), Mike McMillan wrote:

My passport photo page shows my correct details - so far so goodrCa scan
the chip and it comes up with a page of data stating I was born in 2047!
Needless to say, though I have tried ten or more times to pass this
procedure to enable me to progress to HMRC app, I just see rCySomething
went wrongrCO type messages - however and which ever way I try to pass go
and collect -u200, it would seem impossible to make any progress!

The current edition of Private Eye has this extract from a letter from
HMRC to a reader: "Our records show you will reach State Pension age on 30 December 1899."

We are centuries apart with the same problem.
--
Toodle Pip, Mike McMillan
--- Synchronet 3.22a-Linux NewsLink 1.2

From Newsgroup: uk.media.radio.archers

On 2026/6/11 10:43:12, Mike McMillan wrote:
[]

Yes, that telephone message about doing things on-line drives me mad!!!!

Yes, it ought the be obligatory to include "at any time, press 8 to stop
being told I can do it online and how wonderful that is". (Or, of
course, stop that message after, say, 90 seconds.)

DonrCOt talk to me about that V Annoying Muzak they blast down the linerCa.

Especially when it's distorted. And/Or - really twists the knife - has occasional breaks that make you think a human is finally going to attend
to you.
--
J. P. Gilliver. UMRA: 1960/<1985 MB++G()ALIS-Ch++(p)Ar++T+H+Sh0!:`)DNAf

"Look, if it'll help you to do what I tell you, baby, imagine that I've
got a blaster ray in my hand." "Uh - you _have_ got a blaster ray in
your hand." "So you shouldn't have to tax your imagination too hard."
(Link episode)
--- Synchronet 3.22a-Linux NewsLink 1.2

From Newsgroup: uk.media.radio.archers

On 10/06/2026 17:19, Mike McMillan wrote:

Just something to brighten up your day / evening / night.

I registered with HMRC a few months ago so that I might carry out on-line submissions for my tax. The app has always been rCyflakeyrCO to say the least and some days, I could open the app but others, it would not allow me at
all. Getting a little widdled off with this situation and when invited, I decided to reset my password and go through a long procedure to prove I am
me and am alive etc.

Having used Gov UK to ascertain I exist in the past, I was then invited to prove my existence using this app. My only means of rCyproofrCO is my passport
(which was purchased a few years ago solely for the purpose of proving my existence and has never been used for anything else!) I went through the rigmarole of providing my NI number, DOB, colour of toenails, name of
hamster etc., I was then requested to take a photo with my iPhone of the photo page of my passport and , having told them my passport has the
embedded chip in the front cover, was then invited to scan this to confirm information.

My passport photo page shows my correct details - so far so goodrCa scan the chip and it comes up with a page of data stating I was born in 2047!
Needless to say, though I have tried ten or more times to pass this
procedure to enable me to progress to HMRC app, I just see rCySomething went wrongrCO type messages - however and which ever way I try to pass go and collect -u200, it would seem impossible to make any progress!

I am currently waiting for Gov Uk to resolve this, but, I suppose I may
have to wait until I exist in 2047 for a reply! Ho-Hum.

HMRC are a disaster and a damn disgrace. When my mother died in 2017, I
had to get in touch with them so that they could amend their records.
With the security systems they had in place at the time, the only way I
could pass their security checks to speak to them by phone was by
imitating my deceased mother's voice. I'm not making this up. I found
that quite an upsetting experience, and when I complained, I received substantial financial compensation.

I hope you fare better, but do complain - vociferously.
--- Synchronet 3.22a-Linux NewsLink 1.2

From Newsgroup: uk.media.radio.archers

On 11.6.26 09:05, John Armstrong wrote:

On 10/06/2026 17:19, Mike McMillan wrote:

Just something to brighten up your day / evening / night.

I registered with HMRC a few months ago so that I might carry out on-line
submissions for my tax. The app has always been rCyflakeyrCO to say the least
and some days, I could open the app but others, it would not allow me at
all. Getting a little widdled off with this situation and when invited, I
decided to reset my password and go through a long procedure to prove
I am
me and am alive etc.

Having used Gov UK to ascertain I exist in the past, I was then
invited to
prove my existence using this app. My only means of rCyproofrCO is my
passport
(which was purchased a few years ago solely for the purpose of proving my
existence and has never been used for anything else!) I went through the
rigmarole of providing my NI number, DOB, colour of toenails, name of
hamster etc., I was then requested to take a photo with my iPhone of the
photo page of my passport and , having told them my passport has the
embedded chip in the front cover, was then invited to scan this to
confirm
information.

My passport photo page shows my correct details - so far so goodrCa scan
the
chip and it comes up with a page of data stating I was born in 2047!
Needless to say, though I have tried ten or more times to pass this
procedure to enable me to progress to HMRC app, I just see rCySomething
went
wrongrCO type messages - however and which ever way I try to pass go and
collect -u200, it would seem impossible to make any progress!

I am currently waiting for Gov Uk to resolve this, but, I suppose I may
have to wait until I exist in 2047 for a reply! Ho-Hum.

HMRC are a disaster and a damn disgrace. When my mother died in 2017, I
had to get in touch with them so that they could amend their records.
With the security systems they had in place at the time, the only way I could pass their security checks to speak to them by phone was by
imitating my deceased mother's voice. I'm not making this up. I found
that quite an upsetting experience, and when I complained, I received substantial financial compensation.

I hope you fare better, but do complain - vociferously.

I have attempted to do things online with them but either the facility
is not available or does not cater for the particular information I need
to provide - despite them telling me it can be done online.

I have then phoned them to be subject to an extensive lecture on doing
things online - if only.

Some years ago I thought I would pay them to save them adjusting the
following year's tax code. (Yes I do realise it is an interest free
loan but recall my dear mama telling me never to be lender or a debtor).
Come the next year they start deducting the already paid tax, so go
through the rigmarole of phoning them and spent a long time with them
saying that they had no record of the payment (all with the right
information of course) and me saying about the date it left my bank
account and the relevant codes. Luckily it was found eventually but
none of it should have happened. I probably moaned here at the time.
--
Kosmo Richard W
www.travelswmw.whitnet.uk
https://tinyurl.com/KRWpics
--- Synchronet 3.22a-Linux NewsLink 1.2

From Newsgroup: uk.media.radio.archers

Kosmo <krw@whitnet.uk> wrote:

On 11.6.26 09:05, John Armstrong wrote:

On 10/06/2026 17:19, Mike McMillan wrote:

Just something to brighten up your day / evening / night.

I registered with HMRC a few months ago so that I might carry out on-line >>> submissions for my tax. The app has always been rCyflakeyrCO to say the least
and some days, I could open the app but others, it would not allow me at >>> all. Getting a little widdled off with this situation and when invited, I >>> decided to reset my password and go through a long procedure to prove
I am
me and am alive etc.

Having used Gov UK to ascertain I exist in the past, I was then
invited to
prove my existence using this app. My only means of rCyproofrCO is my
passport
(which was purchased a few years ago solely for the purpose of proving my >>> existence and has never been used for anything else!) I went through the >>> rigmarole of providing my NI number, DOB, colour of toenails, name of
hamster etc., I was then requested to take a photo with my iPhone of the >>> photo page of my passport and , having told them my passport has the
embedded chip in the front cover, was then invited to scan this to
confirm
information.

My passport photo page shows my correct details - so far so goodrCa scan >>> the
chip and it comes up with a page of data stating I was born in 2047!
Needless to say, though I have tried ten or more times to pass this
procedure to enable me to progress to HMRC app, I just see rCySomething >>> went
wrongrCO type messages - however and which ever way I try to pass go and >>> collect -u200, it would seem impossible to make any progress!

I am currently waiting for Gov Uk to resolve this, but, I suppose I may
have to wait until I exist in 2047 for a reply! Ho-Hum.

HMRC are a disaster and a damn disgrace. When my mother died in 2017, I
had to get in touch with them so that they could amend their records.
With the security systems they had in place at the time, the only way I
could pass their security checks to speak to them by phone was by
imitating my deceased mother's voice. I'm not making this up. I found
that quite an upsetting experience, and when I complained, I received
substantial financial compensation.

I hope you fare better, but do complain - vociferously.

I have attempted to do things online with them but either the facility
is not available or does not cater for the particular information I need
to provide - despite them telling me it can be done online.

I have then phoned them to be subject to an extensive lecture on doing things online - if only.

Some years ago I thought I would pay them to save them adjusting the following year's tax code. (Yes I do realise it is an interest free
loan but recall my dear mama telling me never to be lender or a debtor).
Come the next year they start deducting the already paid tax, so go
through the rigmarole of phoning them and spent a long time with them
saying that they had no record of the payment (all with the right information of course) and me saying about the date it left my bank
account and the relevant codes. Luckily it was found eventually but
none of it should have happened. I probably moaned here at the time.

Yes, that telephone message about doing things on-line drives me mad!!!! DonrCOt talk to me about that V Annoying Muzak they blast down the linerCa.
--
Toodle Pip, Mike McMillan
--- Synchronet 3.22a-Linux NewsLink 1.2

From Newsgroup: uk.media.radio.archers

On Wed, 10 Jun 2026 16:19:59 -0000 (UTC), Mike McMillan wrote:

My passport photo page shows my correct details - so far so goodrCa scan
the chip and it comes up with a page of data stating I was born in 2047! Needless to say, though I have tried ten or more times to pass this
procedure to enable me to progress to HMRC app, I just see rCySomething
went wrongrCO type messages - however and which ever way I try to pass go
and collect -u200, it would seem impossible to make any progress!

The current edition of Private Eye has this extract from a letter from
HMRC to a reader: "Our records show you will reach State Pension age on 30 December 1899."
--
Jim <http://www.jim-easterbrook.me.uk/>
1959/1985? M B+ G+ A L- I- S- P-- CH0(p) Ar++ T+ H0 Q--- Sh0
--- Synchronet 3.22a-Linux NewsLink 1.2