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And we're back in the past and can check the eyrie archive
once again.
Here's where you can find this and more LNH
Series Action!:
https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Series/LNH/
And it's LNH v1 #38 with Martin Phipps!
Which LNH'r is willing to take a bribe
assuming that bribe is a very sweet
cadillac?! And is Master Blaster's
BIG Gun -- BIG enough for Dr. TRUSH?!!
Find out in...
_
| | Classic
| | =
| | ____ ____ _ ____ ___
| |__ | [] | | [] | | | | [] | | _ \
|____| \__] \__ | |_| \__/ |_|\_\
||
|_| OF NET.HEROES
ADVENTURES #423
=====================
LNH v1 #38
=====================
_
| | DOCTOR STOMPER! BROWSING BOY! MASTER BLASTER!
| | =
| | ____ ____ _ ____ ___
THE | |__ | [] | | [] | | | | [] | | _ \
|____| \__] \__ | |_| \__/ |_|\_\
||
|_| OF NET.HEROES
#38 -- Dagger of the Mind
Browsing Boy enters Doctor Stomper's lab. He carries an issue of
'Psychology Today'.
"Hey, Doc!"
"Yes?"
"I was at a newstand earlier and I started flipping through the
magazines. Anyway, I noticed this article that looked interesting."
Browsing Boy handed the magazine over.
"Hmm. 'The attendants at Net.ropolis Hospital for the Criminally
Insane have made significant progress in the treatment of their patients, making it possible for them to return to a normal life ...'"
Browsing Boy nodded. "They're taking in mass murderers, giving them a
few weeks of treatment and releasing them back to society. Pretty
creepy, huh?"
Doctor Stomper was unsure. "And yet if the criminals are actually being reformed ..."
"Yeah, even so, it wouldn't hurt for us to take a look ourselves."
Doctor Stomper smiled. "Let's go."
In the cafeteria are Master Blaster and, wouldn't you know it, a woman.
"You're new here, aren't you?"
"That's right."
Master Blaster smiled. "They call me 'Master Blaster'."
"I'm Linguist Lass," Linguist Lass said, offering her hand.
Master Blaster hesitated, then shook her hand. "Linguist Lass, huh?
I take it yours is the power to interpret languages."
"Basically, yes."
"Habla Espanola?"
"Si," replied Linguist Lass who proceeded to speak fluent Spanish.
Master Blaster was so sincerely impressed with her that he found himself listening attentatively as she spoke.
Doctor Stomper and Browsing Boy arrive.
"Ah! You're Linguist Lass, right? I'm Doctor Stomper. I remember
Deja Dude mentioning you." They shook hands.
"Deja Dude didn't mention anything about her to me," complained
Master Blaster.
"I guess he figured you'd be able to find her yourself," quipped
Browsing Boy.
"We were on our way to the Net.ropolis Hospital for the Criminally
Insane. Would you like to join us?"
"You're asking us if we want to take a tour in a funny farm?"
Master Blaster asked sarcastically.
"Sounds interesting," said Linguist Lass.
"It does?!"
"We'll have to talk again sometime," Linguist Lass concluded, looking
rather nonchalent.
"Yeah, sure, see you later."
"Bye!"
Master Blaster nodded and waved back at her. "Great. Just great,"
he said as they left.
Linguist Lass, Doctor Stomper and Browsing Boy walk out towards Browsing
Boy's car, a cadilac.
"Nice car," observed Linguist Lass.
Browsing Boy nodded. "Yeah, Elvis Man gave out a few dozen the
day he was voted in as a Legionaire."
"Elvis Man must be awfully wealthy."
"Either that or he's got a huge matter replicator with 'cadilac'
pragrammed in," noted Doctor Stomper. "Of course, in such a case, he'd
become quite wealthy in due course, at least until Chevrolet were to
put a stop to his operation."
The three of them get in (Browsing Boy into the driver's seat, Doctor
Stomper into the passenger seat and Linguist Lass is into the back seat)
and drive off.
Doctor Stomper turned to look at Linguist Lass. "So, tell us about yourself."
Linguist Lass smiled. "There's nothing to tell."
Doctor Stomper frowned. "Don't be shy."
Linguist Lass sighed. "Well, I guess I could start with
kindergarten: the teachers would tell my parents that I was abnormally
eloquent for a five year old, sufficiently so that I was considered
'gifted'. When I was old enough, my parents tried enrolling me into
Professor Sid Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters but apparently I
wasn't considered 'gifted' enough."
"Just as well," noted Browsing Boy. "From what Panta tells us, it
isn't all it's cracked up to be."
"And yet I do seem to have this uncanny ability to get a feel for what
people are saying just by listening to them and watching what they do.
At the same time, I have a better than average auditory memory ... or
so people tell me. All I know is that I learn languages very quickly
just by being around people when they speak."
"So you're constantly learning new languages?"
Linguist Lass shook her head. "Not so much lately. It works best
if I'm actually emersed into the society of the linguistic group in
question. When we'd go on vacation, my parents would made a point of
going to different places so I'd be exposed to different languages."
"And how many different languages have you been exposed to to date?"
"Hundreds."
"And you can speak them all?"
"Well ... there's only about a few dozen languages that I actually
speak fluently."
"Amazing."
Linguist Lass looked puzzled. "Do you really think so, Doctor?"
Doctor Stomper nodded. "I've always prided myself on my reasoning
ability but languages ..." He waved a hand in the air. "Languages
defy logic."
Linguist Lass nodded, understanding as best as she could.
"We're here," announced Browsing Boy.
The car is in front of a guarded gate. On the other side of the gate
is a driveway that leads to the Net.ropolis Hospital for the Criminally
Insane. The guard steps forward and asks them who they are.
"I'm Doctor Stomper, this is Browsing Boy and Linguist Lass. We're
from the Legion of Net.Heroes."
The guard steps back and opens the gate. They drive in.
"That was odd," observed Linguist Lass.
"How so?" asked Doctor Stomper.
"He asked us who we were but he didn't really seem concerned, almost
as if he didn't care, at least not personally."
"Maybe he's just grown accustomed to having people coming and going," Browsing Boy suggested.
"In a cadilac?"
"You're right," realised Doctor Stomper, "that *is* odd."
They arrive at the main building and get out. They are greeted by a
man in a white lab coat.
"Ah, Doctor Stomper, I presume."
"Yes ... Doctor Trush?"
"Please ... call me Brian. With us calling each other 'Doctor',
your fellow Legionaires are bound to feel inferior."
"Heaven forbid!" said Browsing Boy, sarcastically.
"My associates: Browsing Boy and Linguist Lass."
Doctor Trush smiled. "Welcome to our facility."
Doctor Stomper got straight to the point. "I understand you're able
to treat the criminally insane here and send them back out into society
in a matter of weeks. How is this possible?"
"Why don't I show you?" He sweeped out his hands beaconing them to
come with him. "This way."
Our heroes follow Doctor Trush into the building. They pass through the
lobby, by Doctor Trush's office and into a gymnasium where a group of
inmates are seen doing calisthenics under the direction of an attendant.
Upon arriving at the hospital's surgical unit, Browsing Boy asks a
question.
"Is there a bathroom I can use?"
"Sure. Go down the hall: it's on your right."
"Thanks!" said Browsing Boy as he left.
"This surgical unit seems a bit out of place in a psychiatric hospital," observed Doctor Stomper.
"It comes in handy in case one of the patients becomes violent and
hurts themselves and/or others" was the reply Doctor Trush gave.
"Really?" mused Linguist Lass. "Your patients don't appear
particularly violent."
Doctor Trush smiled. "Thank you. I appreciate the compliment."
"What's the secret of your success, Doctor?" Doctor Stomper asked.
Doctor Trush became hesitant. "It's the relaxed environment we have
here: most psychiatric hospitals only serve to deepen a patient's
feeling of pananoia; here, patients are free to walk around unrestricted."
"So what's to stop them from walking out the front door?"
"Trust!" Doctor Trush declared. "And in return, the patients trust us
and, in so doing, learn to trust people on the outside."
Doctor Stomper and Linguist Lass were unconvinced.
"You saw for yourself how relaxed our patients are here."
"That's true," noted Linguist Lass.
Doctor Stomper nodded. "Well, I can't argue with your results." He
offered his hand. "Thank you, Doctor. I think we've seen what we came
to see."
Doctor Trush looked relieved and shook Doctor Stomper's hand. He then
turned towards the direction of the door as if something was wrong just
in time to see Browsing Boy return. Doctor Trush relief became delight.
"I'll see you back to your car."
Soon, our heroes are back in their cadilac and driving towards the gate.
"Well, Browsing Boy, did you manage to get into Doctor Trush's
office?" Doctor Stomper asked.
Browsing Boy nodded. "Nobody even tried to stop me."
"So you got a look at Doctor Trush's files?"
"Yeah and I noticed something strange: shortly after a patient is
admitted here, he's scheduled for an operation; it's only after the
operation that he's allowed to walk around freely."
"Do the files give any details as to what the procedure is?"
Browsing Boy shook his head.
Doctor Stomper nodded. "I think we can figure it out for ourselves
though: patients come here as violent criminals, undergo an operation
and come out positively docile. The only explanation I see is that
they've performed surgury to the reptilian part of the human brain."
"Yes," said Linguist Lass, "if Doctor Trush has managed to destroy
the part of the human brain that is responsible for our survival
instincts while keeping the higher brain functions intact then that
would explain their sudden changes in behaviour."
Doctor Stomper sighed. "Effective ... but unethical. No wonder he
was so evasive with us."
Browsing Boy shivered. "You know what's really scary is that,
according to their employment files, the attendants here have also been operated on."
Linguist Lass suddenly became alarmed. "Uh, guys, they're not openning
the gate for us."
Not only that but the guards were drawing guns and asking them to get
out of the car.
Later, our heroes, withstrained by handcuffs and flanked by attendants,
sit outside the operating room. Doctor Trush arrives.
"You bugged our car," accused Doctor Stomper.
"It was a necessary precaution," argued Doctor Trush.
"You'll never get away with this!" declared Browsing Boy.
"Is that so?" laughed Doctor Trush.
"Just what do you have in mind?" asked Doctor Stomper.
Doctor Trush smiled. "Obviously, I'm going to have to return you to
your headquarters."
"Obviously."
"But what if I were to switch your minds with those of three of our
newest patients?"
"You're insane! Our fellow Legionaires would be able to tell!"
"Would they? Even if you were to all announce that you were retiring
and leave before anyone would notice any difference? As I understand,
Linguist Lass is a brand new member. Are people going to give any
thought if she were to announce that she had changed her mind about
becoming a Legionaire and was going to continue her studies instead?"
"You seem quite sure of yourself," observed Linguist Lass.
"That's because I know what I'm doing." He smiled. "You, Linguist
Lass, will be part of our first pair of patients. Excuse me while I
go get your partner." Doctor Trush left.
"You know, guys, I've just had a thought," mused Doctor Stomper.
"What's that?" asked Browsing Boy.
"These attendants here probably aren't loyal to Doctor Trush; they're
just highly prone to suggestion."
"Which means all we have to do is ask them to release us," realised
Linguist Lass.
Doctor Stomper took a deep breath and spoke with authority. "Release
us!"
The attendants proceeded to unfasten their handcuffs.
"Alright," mused Doctor Stomper as he got up, "we should be able to
just walk out of here and the attendants won't even think to stop us
unless they're told to."
Doctor Trush arrived, flanked by attendants pointing guns at our heroes.
"But if I do tell them to kill you, then they will without hesitation."
"I thought you said you'd have to return us to our headquarters,"
pointed out Doctor Stomper.
Doctor Trush smiled. "And you said I was insane. Do you want to take
the chance that you're right?"
"That probably wouldn't be a good idea," came a voice from off panel.
"The Doc usually *is* right about that kind of thing."
"MASTER BLASTER!" shouted Linguist Lass.
Sure enough, it is Master Blaster, carrying a BIG gun.
"You came after all!"
Master Blaster nodded. "Yeah, well, I was talking to Sister State-the-Obvious and mentioned that the three of you were coming here
and she said that you were probably going to check the place out."
"Obviously," noted Doctor Stomper.
"Yeah, well, it got me thinking that you guys might get into trouble.
Sure enough, here you are!"
Doctor Stomper walked up to the armed attendants. "Give me the guns."
They did. He looked at Doctor Trush. "I'm a bit disappointed in you,
allowing yourself to be intimidated by Master Blaster's weaponry."
"It *is* an awfully BIG gun," Doctor Trush noted, sheepishly.
THE END
by Martin Phipps
==========
Next Week: Something something LNH!!
==========
Arthur "Same Classic Channel. But Same Time? Probably not." Spitzer
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<div dir=3D"ltr">And we're back in the past and can check the eyrie arc= hive <br>once again.<br><br><br>Here's where you can find this and more=
LNH<br>Series Action!:<br><br><a href=3D"
https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/l= nh/Series/LNH/">
https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Series/LNH/</a><br><br>= <br>And it's LNH v1 #38 with Martin Phipps!<br><br><br>Which LNH'r =
is willing to take a bribe<br>assuming that bribe is a very sweet<br>cadill= ac?!=C2=A0 And is Master Blaster's<br>BIG Gun -- BIG enough for Dr. TRU= SH?!!<br><br>Find out in...<br><br><br><br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
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=A0 ADVENTURES #423<br><br><br><br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0LNH v1 #38<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D<br><br><br><br><br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 _<br= >=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0DOCTOR STOMPER!=C2=A0 BROWSING BOY!=C2=A0 MA= STER BLASTER!<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=
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=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0#38 -- Dagger of the Mi= nd<br><br><br>Browsing Boy enters Doctor Stomper's lab.=C2=A0 He carrie=
s an issue of<br>'Psychology Today'.<br><br>=C2=A0 "Hey, Doc!&= quot;<br>=C2=A0 "Yes?"<br>=C2=A0 "I was at a newstand earlie=
r and I started flipping through the<br>magazines.=C2=A0 Anyway, I noticed = this article that looked interesting."<br>Browsing Boy handed the maga= zine over.<br>=C2=A0 "Hmm. =C2=A0'The attendants at Net.ropolis Ho= spital for the Criminally<br>Insane have made significant progress in the t= reatment of their patients,<br>making it possible for them to return to a n= ormal life ...'"<br>=C2=A0 Browsing Boy nodded. =C2=A0"They&#= 39;re taking in mass murderers, giving them a<br>few weeks of treatment and=
releasing them back to society.=C2=A0 Pretty <br>creepy, huh?"<br>=C2= =A0 Doctor Stomper was unsure. =C2=A0"And yet if the criminals are act= ually being<br>reformed ..."<br>=C2=A0 "Yeah, even so, it wouldn&= #39;t hurt for us to take a look ourselves."<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Stomper = smiled. =C2=A0"Let's go."<br><br>In the cafeteria are Master = Blaster and, wouldn't you know it, a woman.<br><br>=C2=A0 "You'= ;re new here, aren't you?"<br>=C2=A0 "That's right."= <br>=C2=A0 Master Blaster smiled. =C2=A0"They call me 'Master Blas= ter'."<br>=C2=A0 "I'm Linguist Lass," Linguist Lass = said, offering her hand.<br>=C2=A0 Master Blaster hesitated, then shook her=
hand. =C2=A0"Linguist Lass, huh?<br>I take it yours is the power to i= nterpret languages."<br>=C2=A0 "Basically, yes."<br>=C2=A0 &= quot;Habla Espanola?"<br>=C2=A0 "Si," replied Linguist Lass = who proceeded to speak fluent Spanish.<br>Master Blaster was so sincerely i= mpressed with her that he found himself<br>listening attentatively as she s= poke.<br><br>Doctor Stomper and Browsing Boy arrive.<br><br>=C2=A0 "Ah= !=C2=A0 You're Linguist Lass, right?=C2=A0 I'm Doctor Stomper.=C2=
=A0 I remember<br>Deja Dude mentioning you." =C2=A0They shook hands.<b= r>=C2=A0 "Deja Dude didn't mention anything about her to me,"=
complained<br>Master Blaster.<br>=C2=A0 "I guess he figured you'd=
be able to find her yourself," quipped<br>Browsing Boy.<br>=C2=A0 &qu= ot;We were on our way to the Net.ropolis Hospital for the Criminally<br>Ins= ane.=C2=A0 Would you like to join us?"<br>=C2=A0 "You're aski=
ng us if we want to take a tour in a funny farm?"<br>Master Blaster as= ked sarcastically.<br>=C2=A0 "Sounds interesting," said Linguist = Lass.<br>=C2=A0 "It does?!"<br>=C2=A0 "We'll have to tal=
k again sometime," Linguist Lass concluded, looking<br>rather nonchale= nt.<br>=C2=A0 "Yeah, sure, see you later."<br>=C2=A0 "Bye!&q= uot;<br>=C2=A0 Master Blaster nodded and waved back at her. =C2=A0"Gre= at.=C2=A0 Just great," <br>he said as they left.<br><br>Linguist Lass,=
Doctor Stomper and Browsing Boy walk out towards Browsing<br>Boy's car=
, a cadilac.<br><br>=C2=A0 "Nice car," observed Linguist Lass.<br= >=C2=A0 Browsing Boy nodded. =C2=A0"Yeah, Elvis Man gave out a few doz=
en the<br>day he was voted in as a Legionaire."<br>=C2=A0 "Elvis = Man must be awfully wealthy."<br>=C2=A0 "Either that or he's = got a huge matter replicator with 'cadilac'<br>pragrammed in,"=
noted Doctor Stomper. =C2=A0"Of course, in such a case, he'd<br>b= ecome quite wealthy in due course, at least until Chevrolet were to<br>put =
a stop to his operation."<br><br>The three of them get in (Browsing Bo=
y into the driver's seat, Doctor<br>Stomper into the passenger seat and=
Linguist Lass is into the back seat)<br>and drive off.<br><br>=C2=A0 Docto=
r Stomper turned to look at Linguist Lass. =C2=A0"So, tell us about <b= r>yourself."<br>=C2=A0 Linguist Lass smiled. =C2=A0"There's n= othing to tell."<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Stomper frowned. =C2=A0"Don'=
;t be shy."<br>=C2=A0 Linguist Lass sighed. =C2=A0"Well, I guess =
I could start with <br>kindergarten: the teachers would tell my parents tha=
t I was abnormally<br>eloquent for a five year old, sufficiently so that I = was considered<br>'gifted'.=C2=A0 When I was old enough, my parents=
tried enrolling me into<br>Professor Sid Xavier's School for Gifted Yo= ungsters but apparently I<br>wasn't considered 'gifted' enough.= "<br>=C2=A0 "Just as well," noted Browsing Boy. =C2=A0"= From what Panta tells us, it<br>isn't all it's cracked up to be.&qu= ot;<br>=C2=A0 "And yet I do seem to have this uncanny ability to get a=
feel for what<br>people are saying just by listening to them and watching = what they do.<br>At the same time, I have a better than average auditory me= mory ... or<br>so people tell me.=C2=A0 All I know is that I learn language=
s very quickly<br>just by being around people when they speak."<br>=C2= =A0 "So you're constantly learning new languages?"<br>=C2=A0 = Linguist Lass shook her head. =C2=A0"Not so much lately.=C2=A0 It work=
s best <br>if I'm actually emersed into the society of the linguistic g= roup in <br>question.=C2=A0 When we'd go on vacation, my parents would = made a point of <br>going to different places so I'd be exposed to diff= erent languages."<br>=C2=A0 "And how many different languages hav=
e you been exposed to to date?"<br>=C2=A0 "Hundreds."<br>=C2= =A0 "And you can speak them all?"<br>=C2=A0 "Well ... there&= #39;s only about a few dozen languages that I actually <br>speak fluently.&= quot;<br>=C2=A0 "Amazing."<br>=C2=A0 Linguist Lass looked puzzled=
. =C2=A0"Do you really think so, Doctor?"<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Stompe=
r nodded. =C2=A0"I've always prided myself on my reasoning<br>abil= ity but languages ..." =C2=A0He waved a hand in the air. =C2=A0"L= anguages<br>defy logic."<br>=C2=A0 Linguist Lass nodded, understanding=
as best as she could.<br>=C2=A0 "We're here," announced Brow= sing Boy.<br><br>The car is in front of a guarded gate.=C2=A0 On the other = side of the gate<br>is a driveway that leads to the Net.ropolis Hospital fo=
r the Criminally<br>Insane.=C2=A0 The guard steps forward and asks them who=
they are.<br><br>=C2=A0 "I'm Doctor Stomper, this is Browsing Boy=
and Linguist Lass.=C2=A0 We're<br>from the Legion of Net.Heroes."= <br><br>The guard steps back and opens the gate.=C2=A0 They drive in.<br><b= r>=C2=A0 "That was odd," observed Linguist Lass.<br>=C2=A0 "= How so?" asked Doctor Stomper.<br>=C2=A0 "He asked us who we were=
but he didn't really seem concerned, almost<br>as if he didn't car=
e, at least not personally."<br>=C2=A0 "Maybe he's just grown=
accustomed to having people coming and going,"<br>Browsing Boy sugges= ted.<br>=C2=A0 "In a cadilac?"<br>=C2=A0 "You're right,&= quot; realised Doctor Stomper, "that *is* odd."<br><br>They arriv=
e at the main building and get out.=C2=A0 They are greeted by a <br>man in =
a white lab coat.<br><br>=C2=A0 "Ah, Doctor Stomper, I presume."<= br>=C2=A0 "Yes ... Doctor Trush?"<br>=C2=A0 "Please ... call=
me Brian.=C2=A0 With us calling each other 'Doctor', <br>your fell=
ow Legionaires are bound to feel inferior."<br>=C2=A0 "Heaven for= bid!" said Browsing Boy, sarcastically.<br>=C2=A0 "My associates:=
Browsing Boy and Linguist Lass."<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Trush smiled. =C2= =A0"Welcome to our facility."<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Stomper got straig=
ht to the point. =C2=A0"I understand you're able<br>to treat the c= riminally insane here and send them back out into society<br>in a matter of=
weeks.=C2=A0 How is this possible?"<br>=C2=A0 "Why don't I s= how you?" =C2=A0He sweeped out his hands beaconing them to<br>come wit=
h him. =C2=A0"This way."<br><br>Our heroes follow Doctor Trush in=
to the building.=C2=A0 They pass through the<br>lobby, by Doctor Trush'=
s office and into a gymnasium where a group of <br>inmates are seen doing c= alisthenics under the direction of an attendant.<br>Upon arriving at the ho= spital's surgical unit, Browsing Boy asks a <br>question.<br><br>=C2=A0=
"Is there a bathroom I can use?"<br>=C2=A0 "Sure.=C2=A0 Go = down the hall: it's on your right."<br>=C2=A0 "Thanks!" = said Browsing Boy as he left.<br>=C2=A0 "This surgical unit seems a bi=
t out of place in a psychiatric hospital,"<br>observed Doctor Stomper.= <br>=C2=A0 "It comes in handy in case one of the patients becomes viol= ent and <br>hurts themselves and/or others" was the reply Doctor Trush=
gave.<br>=C2=A0 "Really?" mused Linguist Lass. =C2=A0"Your = patients don't appear <br>particularly violent."<br>=C2=A0 Doctor = Trush smiled. =C2=A0"Thank you.=C2=A0 I appreciate the compliment.&quo= t;<br>=C2=A0 "What's the secret of your success, Doctor?" Doc= tor Stomper asked.<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Trush became hesitant. =C2=A0"It&#= 39;s the relaxed environment we have <br>here: most psychiatric hospitals o= nly serve to deepen a patient's <br>feeling of pananoia; here, patients=
are free to walk around unrestricted."<br>=C2=A0 "So what's =
to stop them from walking out the front door?"<br>=C2=A0 "Trust!&= quot; Doctor Trush declared. =C2=A0"And in return, the patients trust = us<br>and, in so doing, learn to trust people on the outside."<br>=C2=
=A0 Doctor Stomper and Linguist Lass were unconvinced.<br>=C2=A0 "You = saw for yourself how relaxed our patients are here."<br>=C2=A0 "T= hat's true," noted Linguist Lass.<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Stomper nodded.=
=C2=A0"Well, I can't argue with your results." =C2=A0He<br>o= ffered his hand. =C2=A0"Thank you, Doctor.=C2=A0 I think we've see=
n what we came<br>to see."<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Trush looked relieved and = shook Doctor Stomper's hand.=C2=A0 He then<br>turned towards the direct= ion of the door as if something was wrong just<br>in time to see Browsing B=
oy return.=C2=A0 Doctor Trush relief became delight.<br>"I'll see = you back to your car."<br><br>Soon, our heroes are back in their cadil=
ac and driving towards the gate.<br><br>=C2=A0 "Well, Browsing Boy, di=
d you manage to get into Doctor Trush's <br>office?" Doctor Stompe=
r asked.<br>=C2=A0 Browsing Boy nodded. =C2=A0"Nobody even tried to st=
op me."<br>=C2=A0 "So you got a look at Doctor Trush's files?= "<br>=C2=A0 "Yeah and I noticed something strange: shortly after =
a patient is<br>admitted here, he's scheduled for an operation; it'=
s only after the<br>operation that he's allowed to walk around freely.&= quot;<br>=C2=A0 "Do the files give any details as to what the procedur=
e is?"<br>=C2=A0 Browsing Boy shook his head.<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Stomper=
nodded. =C2=A0"I think we can figure it out for ourselves<br>though: = patients come here as violent criminals, undergo an operation<br>and come o=
ut positively docile.=C2=A0 The only explanation I see is that<br>they'=
ve performed surgury to the reptilian part of the human brain."<br>=C2= =A0 "Yes," said Linguist Lass, "if Doctor Trush has managed =
to destroy<br>the part of the human brain that is responsible for our survi= val <br>instincts while keeping the higher brain functions intact then that= <br>would explain their sudden changes in behaviour."<br>=C2=A0 Doctor=
Stomper sighed. =C2=A0"Effective ... but unethical.=C2=A0 No wonder h= e<br>was so evasive with us."<br>=C2=A0 Browsing Boy shivered. =C2=A0&= quot;You know what's really scary is that, <br>according to their emplo= yment files, the attendants here have also been <br>operated on."<br>= =C2=A0 Linguist Lass suddenly became alarmed. =C2=A0"Uh, guys, they= 9;re not openning <br>the gate for us."<br>=C2=A0 Not only that but th=
e guards were drawing guns and asking them to get <br>out of the car.<br><b= r>Later, our heroes, withstrained by handcuffs and flanked by attendants, <= br>sit outside the operating room.=C2=A0 Doctor Trush arrives.<br><br>=C2=
=A0 "You bugged our car," accused Doctor Stomper.<br>=C2=A0 "= ;It was a necessary precaution," argued Doctor Trush.<br>=C2=A0 "= You'll never get away with this!" declared Browsing Boy.<br>=C2=A0=
"Is that so?" laughed Doctor Trush.<br>=C2=A0 "Just what do=
you have in mind?" asked Doctor Stomper.<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Trush smile=
d. =C2=A0"Obviously, I'm going to have to return you to<br>your he= adquarters."<br>=C2=A0 "Obviously."<br>=C2=A0 "But what=
if I were to switch your minds with those of three of our<br>newest patien= ts?"<br>=C2=A0 "You're insane!=C2=A0 Our fellow Legionaires w= ould be able to tell!"<br>=C2=A0 "Would they?=C2=A0 Even if you w= ere to all announce that you were retiring<br>and leave before anyone would=
notice any difference?=C2=A0 As I understand, <br>Linguist Lass is a brand=
new member.=C2=A0 Are people going to give any <br>thought if she were to = announce that she had changed her mind about <br>becoming a Legionaire and = was going to continue her studies instead?"<br>=C2=A0 "You seem q= uite sure of yourself," observed Linguist Lass.<br>=C2=A0 "That&#= 39;s because I know what I'm doing." =C2=A0He smiled. =C2=A0"= You, Linguist<br>Lass, will be part of our first pair of patients.=C2=A0 Ex= cuse me while I<br>go get your partner." =C2=A0Doctor Trush left.<br>= =C2=A0 "You know, guys, I've just had a thought," mused Docto=
r Stomper.<br>=C2=A0 "What's that?" asked Browsing Boy.<br>= =C2=A0 "These attendants here probably aren't loyal to Doctor Trus=
h; they're<br>just highly prone to suggestion."<br>=C2=A0 "Wh= ich means all we have to do is ask them to release us," realised <br>L= inguist Lass.<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Stomper took a deep breath and spoke with au= thority. =C2=A0"Release <br>us!"<br>=C2=A0 The attendants proceed=
ed to unfasten their handcuffs.<br>=C2=A0 "Alright," mused Doctor=
Stomper as he got up, "we should be able to<br>just walk out of here = and the attendants won't even think to stop us<br>unless they're to=
ld to."<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Trush arrived, flanked by attendants pointing=
guns at our heroes.<br>"But if I do tell them to kill you, then they = will without hesitation."<br>=C2=A0 "I thought you said you'd=
have to return us to our headquarters," <br>pointed out Doctor Stompe= r.<br>=C2=A0 Doctor Trush smiled. =C2=A0"And you said I was insane.=C2= =A0 Do you want to take <br>the chance that you're right?"<br>=C2=
=A0 "That probably wouldn't be a good idea," came a voice fro=
m off panel.<br>"The Doc usually *is* right about that kind of thing.&= quot;<br>=C2=A0 "MASTER BLASTER!" shouted Linguist Lass. =C2=A0<b= r><br>Sure enough, it is Master Blaster, carrying a BIG gun.<br><br>=C2=A0 = "You came after all!"<br>=C2=A0 Master Blaster nodded. =C2=A0&quo= t;Yeah, well, I was talking to Sister <br>State-the-Obvious and mentioned t= hat the three of you were coming here<br>and she said that you were probabl=
y going to check the place out."<br>=C2=A0 "Obviously," note=
d Doctor Stomper.<br>=C2=A0 "Yeah, well, it got me thinking that you g= uys might get into trouble.<br>Sure enough, here you are!"<br>=C2=A0 D= octor Stomper walked up to the armed attendants. =C2=A0"Give me the gu= ns."<br>They did.=C2=A0 He looked at Doctor Trush. =C2=A0"I'm=
a bit disappointed in you,<br>allowing yourself to be intimidated by Maste=
r Blaster's weaponry."<br>=C2=A0 "It *is* an awfully BIG gun,= " Doctor Trush noted, sheepishly.<br><br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 THE END<br><br><br>by Martin Phipps<br><br><br><br><br>=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D<br><br>Next Week: =C2=A0Something something LNH!!<br><br>= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D<br><br>Arthur "Same Classic Channel.=C2= =A0 But Same Time?=C2=A0 Probably not." Spitzer <br><br><br></div>
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