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LNH: Classic LNH Adventures #408: LNH v1 #34

From Arthur Spitzer@arspitzer2@gmail.com to rec.arts.comics.creative on Sun Mar 15 20:44:20 2026

From Newsgroup: rec.arts.comics.creative

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And we're back in the past and can check the eyrie archive
once again.

Here's where you can find this and more LNH Series
Action!:

https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Series/LNH/

And it's LNH v1 #34 by Martin Phipps!

Is it finally time to deal with that
mysterious shadowy figure that keeps
killing all of the second rate villains
or can the LNH keep pushing that off
til some later date?!

And is it time for Ordinary Lady to find
out how single the Ultimate Ninja is?!!!

Find out in...

_
| | Classic
| | =
| | ____ ____ _ ____ ___
| |__ | [] | | [] | | | | [] | | _ \

|____| \__] \__ | |_| \__/ |_|\_\
||
|_| OF NET.HEROES

ADVENTURES #408

=====================
LNH v1 #34
=====================

_
| | ULTIMATE NINJA! DEJA DUDE! SISTER STATE-THE-OBVIOUS!
| | =
| | ____ ____ _ ____ ___
THE | |__ | [] | | [] | | | | [] | | _ \
|____| \__] \__ | |_| \__/ |_|\_\
||
|_| OF NET.HEROES

#34 -- Repercusions

In the Central Command Centre sit Sig Lad, Doctor Stomper, Kid Kirby,
Cliche Dude, Obscure Trivia Lad, Irony Man and Pliable Lad. Ultimate
Ninja stands.

"Alright, first things first: do we have any reason to believe that
these murders are related?" Ultimate Ninja asked.
"All witnesses have described the same shadowy figure appearing out
of nowhere, raising a gun and vapourising his assailant where he
stood," said Sig.Lad in reply.
"How many different cases are we talking about?"
"With witnesses? Only three: the murder of Capitaine Cartel and
the incidents described by McLaughlin Man and wReamicus Maximus."
"How do we know they're telling the truth?" asked Cliche Dude.
"We don't," Sig.Lad said frankly.
Doctor Stomper spoke up. "There's also the ferenzic evidence."
"Go on," urged Ultimate Ninja.
"In each case, there were very few remains as if a plasma weapon
were being used, say one that produced a stream of electrons and
positrons that upon reaching the victim spread out to --"
"Your point, Doctor?" Ultimate Ninja asked.
Doctor Stomper nodded. "Such a weapon would be -- and has in fact
been demonstrated to be -- quite lethal. I can only *hope* that
there aren't too many of them being carried around."
There was silience.

Deja Dude arrives, via teleportation, with Ordinary Lady at his side.
She carries a suitcase.

"Hi guys!" said Deja Dude in greeting.
Ultimate Ninja stepped forward. "Deja here says you want to become
a Legionaire. Is that right, Ordinary Lady?"
Ordinary Lady nodded. "That's right ... but please call me Jean!"
She smiled.
Ultimate Ninja winced. "That would not be appropriate: we *always*
refer to each other by our code names."
"Oh," said Ordinary Lady, apparently disappointed.
Ultimate Ninja turned to Pliable Lad. "Show this lady around will
you?"
Pliable Lad nodded reluctantly. He was a bit tired with the way
Ultimate Ninja was having him do all the menial tasks that he used
to have RosterwReam do before he became wReamhack. He looked at
Ordinary Lady. "Well, at least she's pretty," he thought. "Not that
she's anywhere near as pretty as Panta." He sighed.

Later, Sister State-the-Obvious is helping Ordinary Lady unpack in
her quarters.

"Have you been a Legionaire long?" Ordinary Lady asked.
"As long as I can remember," said Sister State-the-Obvious.
"And how long is that?"
"Eight months."
"Eight MONTHS?!"
Sister State-the-Obvious nodded. "The first thing I remember is
being with Romantic Innuendo. She was going on about how she would
like more women in the Legion so that they could pair off with the
guys: anyway, I said 'You mean, so they fall in love, right?' but
she just laughed and the next thing I knew I was running off to get
married to Bandwagon Boy."
"You got married?!"
"No." Sister State-the-Obvious thought for a moment. "To tell
you the truth, I'm not sure what happened: after my first appearance,
I wasn't used for another five months for anything more than a
cameo."
"What about Bandwagon Boy?"
Sister State-the-Obvious shrugged her shoulders. "He's still
around ... I think."
Ordinary Lady nodded. "I guess you know the Legionaires pretty
well."
"I suppose so."
"What about Ultimate Ninja?"
"What about him?"
"How well do you know him?"
Sister State-the-Obvious hesitated before speaking. "About as well
as anybody I suppose. He's very private."
Ordinary Lady nodded. "I guess he's got a lot of work to do."
"Well, he *is* a ninja."
Ordinary Lady frowned. "You lost me."
Sister State-the-Obvious nodded. "Ninjas are very disciplined."
"Oh, of course! All his spare time would be spent training."
Ordinary Lady sighed. "Or at least that would be the case if this
were real life."
This time Sister State-the-Obvious was confused. "What do you
mean?"
Ordinary Lady smiled coyishly. "Just that, given that this is
fiction, a writer could see to it that he had time for other things
besides training and leadership."
"Such as?"
Ordinary Lady shrugged her shoulders. "Oh, I don't know. I'm
not a writer, am I?"
Sister State-the-Obvious laughed.
"Look, I'll just finish putting these clothes away myself, OK?"
Sister State-the-Obvious nodded. "OK."
"Thanks for your help!"
"No problem!" Sister State-the-Obvious went and opened the door.
She waved at Ordinary Lady. "Bye!" She left.
Ordinary Lady put her clothes away and smiled in satisfaction. She
then walked over to the coffee table, picked up the book that she'd
brought with her and layed back on the bed and proceeded to read it.
It was a Harlequin romance novel.

NEXT: Reactions

by Martin Phipps

==========

Next Week: Something Something LNH!!!!!

==========

Arthur "Same Classic Channel. But Same Time? Probably not." Spitzer

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<div dir=3D"ltr">And we're back in the past and can check the eyrie arc= hive once again. Here's where you can find this and more=
LNH Series Action!: <a href=3D"https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/l= nh/Series/LNH/">https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Series/LNH/</a> = And it's LNH v1 #34 by Martin Phipps! Is it finally time to = deal with that mysterious shadowy figure that keeps killing all of th=
e second rate villains or can the LNH keep pushing that off til some = later date?! And is it time for Ordinary Lady to find out how sin= gle the Ultimate Ninja is?!!! Find out in... =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 _ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
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=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ = =C2=A0 =C2=A0_ =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ =C2=A0 =C2=A0___ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| |__ =C2=A0 | [] | =C2=A0| [] | =C2=A0| | =C2=
=A0| [] | =C2=A0| _ \ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0|____| =C2=A0 \__] =C2=A0 =C2=A0\__ | =C2=A0|_| =C2=A0 \__/ =C2=
=A0 |_|\_\ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|| =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 |_| =C2=A0OF NET.HEROES =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ADVENTURES #408 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0LNH v1 #34 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D <= br> =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 _ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0ULTI= MATE NINJA!=C2=A0 DEJA DUDE!=C2=A0 SISTER STATE-THE-OBVIOUS! =C2=A0 =C2=
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=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ = =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ =C2=A0 =C2=A0_ =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ =C2=A0 =C2=A0___ THE = =C2=A0| |__ =C2=A0 | [] | =C2=A0| [] | =C2=A0| | =C2=A0| [] | =C2=A0| _ \<b= r>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|____| =C2=A0 \__] =C2=A0 =C2=A0\__ | =C2=A0|_| =C2=
=A0 \__/ =C2=A0 |_|\_\ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|| =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 |_| =C2=A0OF NET.HE= ROES =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 #34 -- Repercusions In the Central Command Cent=
re sit Sig Lad, Doctor Stomper, Kid Kirby, Cliche Dude, Obscure Trivia L= ad, Irony Man and Pliable Lad.=C2=A0 Ultimate Ninja stands. =C2=
=A0 "Alright, first things first: do we have any reason to believe tha= t these murders are related?" Ultimate Ninja asked. =C2=A0 &quot= ;All witnesses have described the same shadowy figure appearing out of = nowhere, raising a gun and vapourising his assailant where he =C2=A0 sto= od," said Sig.Lad in reply. =C2=A0 "How many different cases a=
re we talking about?" =C2=A0 "With witnesses?=C2=A0 Only three=
: the murder of Capitaine Cartel and the incidents described by McLaughl=
in Man and wReamicus Maximus." =C2=A0 "How do we know they&#39= ;re telling the truth?" asked Cliche Dude. =C2=A0 "We don'= t," Sig.Lad said frankly. =C2=A0 Doctor Stomper spoke up. =C2=A0&qu= ot;There's also the ferenzic evidence." =C2=A0 "Go on,&quo=
t; urged Ultimate Ninja. =C2=A0 "In each case, there were very few = remains as if a plasma weapon were being used, say one that produced a s= tream of electrons and positrons that upon reaching the victim spread o=
ut to --" =C2=A0 "Your point, Doctor?" Ultimate Ninja ask= ed. =C2=A0 Doctor Stomper nodded. =C2=A0"Such a weapon would be -- = and has in fact been demonstrated to be -- quite lethal.=C2=A0 I can onl=
y *hope* that =C2=A0 there aren't too many of them being carried aro= und." =C2=A0 There was silience. =C2=A0 Deja Dude arrives, v=
ia teleportation, with Ordinary Lady at his side. She carries a suitcase= . =C2=A0 "Hi guys!" said Deja Dude in greeting. =C2=A0 = Ultimate Ninja stepped forward. =C2=A0"Deja here says you want to beco= me a Legionaire.=C2=A0 Is that right, Ordinary Lady?" =C2=A0 Ord= inary Lady nodded. =C2=A0"That's right ... but please call me Jean= !" She smiled. =C2=A0 Ultimate Ninja winced. =C2=A0"That wo= uld not be appropriate: we *always* refer to each other by our code name= s." =C2=A0 "Oh," said Ordinary Lady, apparently disappoin= ted. =C2=A0 Ultimate Ninja turned to Pliable Lad. =C2=A0"Show this = lady around will you?" =C2=A0 Pliable Lad nodded reluctantly.=C2= =A0 He was a bit tired with the way Ultimate Ninja was having him do all=
the menial tasks that he used to have RosterwReam do before he became w= Reamhack.=C2=A0 He looked at Ordinary Lady. =C2=A0"Well, at least s= he's pretty," he thought. =C2=A0"Not that she's anywhe=
re near as pretty as Panta." =C2=A0He sighed. Later, Sister Sta= te-the-Obvious is helping Ordinary Lady unpack in =C2=A0 her quarters.<b= r> =C2=A0 "Have you been a Legionaire long?" Ordinary Lady ask= ed. =C2=A0 "As long as I can remember," said Sister State-the-= Obvious. =C2=A0 "And how long is that?" =C2=A0 "Eight = months." =C2=A0 "Eight MONTHS?!" =C2=A0 Sister State-t= he-Obvious nodded. =C2=A0"The first thing I remember is being with = Romantic Innuendo.=C2=A0 She was going on about how she would like more = women in the Legion so that they could pair off with the guys: anyway, I=
said 'You mean, so they fall in love, right?' but she just laug= hed and the next thing I knew I was running off to get married to Bandwa= gon Boy." =C2=A0 "You got married?!" =C2=A0 "No.&= quot; =C2=A0Sister State-the-Obvious thought for a moment. =C2=A0"To t= ell you the truth, I'm not sure what happened: after my first appear= ance, I wasn't used for another five months for anything more than a=
=C2=A0 cameo." =C2=A0 "What about Bandwagon Boy?" = =C2=A0 Sister State-the-Obvious shrugged her shoulders. =C2=A0"He'=
s still =C2=A0 around ... I think." =C2=A0 Ordinary Lady nodded.=
=C2=A0"I guess you know the Legionaires pretty =C2=A0 well."<= br>=C2=A0 "I suppose so." =C2=A0 "What about Ultimate Nin= ja?" =C2=A0 "What about him?" =C2=A0 "How well do=
you know him?" =C2=A0 Sister State-the-Obvious hesitated before sp= eaking. =C2=A0"About as well as anybody I suppose.=C2=A0 He's v= ery private." =C2=A0 Ordinary Lady nodded. =C2=A0"I guess he&#= 39;s got a lot of work to do." =C2=A0 "Well, he *is* a ninja.&= quot; =C2=A0 Ordinary Lady frowned. =C2=A0"You lost me." = =C2=A0 Sister State-the-Obvious nodded. =C2=A0"Ninjas are very discipl= ined." =C2=A0 "Oh, of course!=C2=A0 All his spare time would b=
e spent training." =C2=A0 Ordinary Lady sighed. =C2=A0"Or at l= east that would be the case if this =C2=A0 were real life." =C2=
=A0 This time Sister State-the-Obvious was confused. =C2=A0"What do yo=
u =C2=A0 mean?" =C2=A0 Ordinary Lady smiled coyishly. =C2=A0&quo= t;Just that, given that this is fiction, a writer could see to it that =
he had time for other things besides training and leadership." = =C2=A0 "Such as?" =C2=A0 Ordinary Lady shrugged her shoulders.=
=C2=A0"Oh, I don't know.=C2=A0 I'm not a writer, am I?&quo= t; =C2=A0 Sister State-the-Obvious laughed. =C2=A0 "Look, I'=
ll just finish putting these clothes away myself, OK?" =C2=A0 Siste=
r State-the-Obvious nodded. =C2=A0"OK." =C2=A0 "Thanks fo=
r your help!" =C2=A0 "No problem!" =C2=A0Sister State-the= -Obvious went and opened the door. She waved at Ordinary Lady. =C2=A0&qu= ot;Bye!" =C2=A0She left. =C2=A0 Ordinary Lady put her clothes away = and smiled in satisfaction.=C2=A0 She then walked over to the coffee tab= le, picked up the book that she'd brought with her and layed back on=
the bed and proceeded to read it. It was a Harlequin romance novel. = NEXT: Reactions by Martin Phipps =3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D Next Week: =C2=A0Something Something LNH!!!= !! =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D Arthur "Same Classic C= hannel.=C2=A0 But Same Time?=C2=A0 Probably not." Spitzer </div>

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