Forum: Too Lazy BBS

LNH: Classic LNH Adventures #403: Ultimate Ninja #10

From Arthur Spitzer@arspitzer2@gmail.com to rec.arts.comics.creative on Sun Feb 8 21:13:05 2026

From Newsgroup: rec.arts.comics.creative

--000000000000bbcdbe064a567cdd
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="UTF-8"

And we're back in the past and can check the eyrie archive
once again.

Here's where you can find this and more Ultimate Ninja
Action!:

https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Series/Ultimate.Ninja/

And it's Ultimate Ninja #10 by Raymond "wReam" Bingham!

Is it time for some more Net.Justice to be Served?!
Is it time for some unfortunate Soda Pop Accidents?!!
And is it time to force all the LNH to wear Purple
Beenies that beep all the time (even the ones that don't
look good in a beenie?!!!!!!!)

Find out in...

_
| | Classic
| | =
| | ____ ____ _ ____ ___
| |__ | [] | | [] | | | | [] | | _ \

|____| \__] \__ | |_| \__/ |_|\_\
||
|_| OF NET.HEROES

ADVENTURES #403

=====================
Ultimate Ninja #10
=====================

|
| \ | /
\ | / / + \
---- *----|\ |\--+ +---* + -- --
/ | | \ | | | | | / ULTIMATE NINJA #10
| | \ | | +--+ | \

| | |\ \| | +--+ |
| | | \ | | | | "MAKE A BIRTHDAY WISH!!!"
| |__|__ \/ | | |
| \|___| |___|
|_____________\ <SPECIAL BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION>

|
|
\ / \ /
\ ^ /
/ / \ \
- - - | * | - - -
\ \#/ /
/ | | \
/ \|/|/ \
___________| |_______________
./ * HAPPY . |/| BIRTHDAY * .*\.
( * . * . * vvvvv * . * . * .* )
|\_ .*LEGION OF NET.HEROES! * . _/|
|V \___________________________/V |
|.VV . V . V V . V V . V V .V .|
Q . VV V V V V V V V .D
|\O . . . . . . . . .O/|
|/\\_O___O___O___O___O___O___O_//\|
_________|o \/ \_/ \_/ \_/ \_/ \_/ \_/ \/
o|___________________________________
\ o o o o o o o o o |
8p o o o o o o o 8o by wReam...
\_o8o____o8o____o8o____o8o__P 1993 (C)opyright L.N.H. _______________________________________________________________________________

"Cheesecake Eater lad that is amazing!" Parking Karma kid said in amazement gazing up at a huge and fancily decorated cheesecake.
"Do you think so? I don't know if it is awe inspiring enough to merit
being the cake of cakes!" Cheesecake-Eater flogged himself with delight. He knew this culinary delight was a masterpiece.
"Oh come now it is only a birthday cake!" BadTiming boy said entering
in mid conversation.
"ONLY A BIRTHDAY CAKE!?" fumed C-ELad. "This is THE birthday cake!
The one for the celebration of the LNH being one year old!"
"Whoopdeedooo!" BTBoy said raising an eyebrow pessimistically.
Cheesecake Eater Lad raised a kitchen knife at the unenthusiastic
boy
and gave off a threatening look, but PK Kid caught CheeseCake Eater's arm before he could throw the knife. Bad Timing Boy ran out of the room.
"Boy! You sure have been quite anxious lately. I think you need to
stop hanging around Ultimate Ninja! You are ready to kill something!"
Parking
Karma Kid said observanty.
"You mean you are taking all this stuff that's been going on, in
stride?" CheeseCake eater accused in disbelief.
"What stuff?" PK Kid looked on.
"YOu know all this romance stuff. I mean with Alliteration Lass and
Occultism Kid, Panta and Ultimate Ninja, Organic Lass and Pliable Lad, or
was
that pocket man and Ultimate Ninja switched with, Hamster Man and Bandwagon chick, and Sister state the obvious and Master Blaster or um was that ummm,
and
Renegade Programmer and his computer... or errrr..." Cheesecake Eater Lad could feel his head start spinning.
"Oh the ROMANCE THING!?" Parking Karma Kid said anxiously. "Well I
will just wait until Bandwagon Chick comes to her senses! After all we are destined to love each other!"
"How do you know that!?" Cheesecake Eater said incredulously.
"Oh I asked All-Knowing-Last-Chance-Whiner-Destiny Woman and she said
it was soo..." PK kid said smiling.
"Really?! Wow, whenever I go ask her a question she answers in weird
riddles and I can never quite get the right interpretations!"
"Well you do have to know how to interpret her speech!" PK Kid said confidently. "Besides, it has gotten a whole LOT easier to understand her
now
that she is one of the members of the Psychic Friend's Inter.Network!"
"Maybe if you came with me, you would be able to provide a
translation!!" Cheesecake Eater Lad said getting excited.
"Ok, but first put the Birthday cake away, we don't want it to get
spoiled."

****************************************************************************

Ultimate Ninja hadn't been to his ready room for quite a while. He had been avoiding returning to being leader, but eventually the powers that caused
him
to procrastinate the LNH maintenance had to be faced. Things were pretty
quiet
around the base and so perhaps UN could get some paperwork done before the
big
anniversary bash started this evening. Aproaching his office he noticed
tread
marks in the carpet, like worn groves. The groves went into his office. Someone had been in his office unauthorized!? UN fumed. He grabbed hold of the door and cautiously opened it.
"WHAT THE HECK IS THIS MESS!?" Ultimate Ninja cried in alarm. There
was a mountain of caffeinated drinks towering in the center of his room. In the background UN could hear a distinct snickering sound with his keen ninja ears (tm), and he sprang into the room to find the culprit of this
travesty.
But know one visible was in the room. Unsheathing his Ginsu Katana blade Ultimate ninja began to swing through the air slicing an occasional crate of soda as he attempted to pinpoint the source of the laughter. Then concentrating he listened carefully to where the air molecules were being displaced by some entity and struck at the invisible foe, but before he
could
deliver the lethal blow, the ginsu Katana blade suddenly turned red hot. UN yelped in pain and dropped it onto the carpet that was now drenched with
pop,
from the crates UN had split open. It sizzled back to coolness, UN picked
up
the blade. Listening carefully UN determined the Invisible entity had fled
the
room.
Great, another invisible threat to the LNH's security, Ultiamte Ninja
thought impatiently.
"Captain CleanUp?" UN called down to the central control room. UN
stood in a puddle of pop disgustedly awaiting assitance.

******************************************************************************

wReamhack wracked his brains as he watched the portly Renegade Programmer produce a program of pragmatic proportions.
"So in other words you compile this pragma with a union because you
want to see the summary solution?" wReamhack squirmed.
"No! what are you talking about. It is done with my special algorithm
here! It is sooo clear!" Renegade Programmer didn't look up from his
monitor,
and kept going.
wReamhack watched frustratedly. He didn't have a clue, but being
wReamhack he was determined to understand something of the ways of hackers! "Why don't you go get me a MicroBurger!?" Renegade Programmer
said hungrily.
"ok." wReamhack said unhappily.
wReamhack left the central room and headed for the kitchen. Passing
the rec.lounge he stopped at a sight he had not seen for a very long time... more like forever!? Incredible Unsleeping Man and Late Night Lad were
asleep
on the couch. It was pretty late, or getting there, so late Night Lad
should
be up and just getting ready for a long night's vigil, not sound asleep!
"Hey! Timewaster!? What is the deal!?" wReamhack said pointing to
the two sleeping beauties.
"Oh they have been sleeping for a couple days now." Timewaster said
watching the Home shopping channel. "I was gonna mention that they were not awake but I sorta got involved in my TV watching."
"HOLEE!" wReamhack cried in alarm. Grabbing a com.unit wReamhack
cried for help. "Medical emergency, Medical emergency! Get Organic Lass to the rec.lounge immediately!"
A few seconds later and Ori was at the side of the two sleeping heroes.
"Is there any hope doctor?" Cliche Dude said arriving to help Organic
Lass with a gurney.
"Yes, It isn't as serious as you would think. Their bodies have just
gone into a sleeping coma." Organic Lass said confidently.
"Sounds pretty serious to me!?" wReamhack was not convinced.
"OH doctor, IS there a CURE!?" Cliched Dude said dramatically.
"Yeah, all we need to do is get some Caffeine in their systems."
"Caffeine? That probably explains why they started sleeping a day or
so after Ultimate Ninja got rid of the pop machine and replaced it with a
decaf
commie slurpee machine!" Timewaster Lad said indignantly. "stupid slurpees don't do half the job of keeping me awake so I can watch more TV, that those caffeine drinks did..."
"But where are we gonna get a caffeinated drink now that we don't have
any in LNH.HQ?" wReamhack asked to no one in particular.
"Try Ultimate Ninja's Office!" Captain cleanup said in passing.
"WHAT!?" the whole group said in chorus.
"wReamhack, before you go see the big cheese about getting Caffeine,
ask UN if we can watch the LNH special on TV tonight! It might be fun to
see
what special things are going on for our special anniversary party on TV?"
Time
Waster Lad declared out of the blue. The sentence didn't make much sense either, but wReamhack was in too much of a hurry to worry about semantics,
and
ran to the office.

******************************************************************************

"You know, ever since All-Knowing-Last-Chance-Whiner-Destiny Woman
talked with that weird group on TV, she has been even harder to
understand!"
CheeseCake Eater Lad said concerned.
"What that Psychic Friends Inter.Network!? Oh I think she has really
gotten to be more open with her predictions..." Parking Karma Kid debated. "No. All she has learned to do is talk about vague things that can
be interpretted to your heart's delight!"
"Shhh. She will sense you!" PK Kid shushed cautiously since they were pratically outside her divining parlor.
"Oh you take this too seriously."
Cheesecake Eater and Parking Karma Kid entered the
LNH.HQ.divining.shrine and sat in a couple of plush chairs. The room was pretty dark and a dark figure appeared in the back of the room across a
table
from a crystal ball that emanated its own light.
"Don't turn away Cheesecake Eater Lad! I sense that you are skeptic!
That is good! Most people are skeptic, but I have a power, given to me by
the
Net.Powers.that.B and they will help you know what you want to know." came
a
voice that sounded strangely like All-Knowing-Last-chance-whiner-destiny
woman.
"Approach the crystal."
"Ok." Parking Karma Kid lifted his friend out of his seat and helped
him to the chair where he was supposed to sit. Cheesecake Eater resisted
his
help protesting and saying that he knew where to go.
"I sense you come in search of answers! You seek to know a question
that you have thought about for some time!" AKLCWD Woman said gazing into
the
crystal.
"No Duh! Else I wouldn't have come here!" Cheesecake eater said
twiddling his thumbs.

** *** **** *** ** * ** *** **** ***

"Holeee." wReamhack backed away from Ultimate Ninja's Ready Room
entrance. The carpet was brown and Ultimate Ninja was covered from head to
toe
in sticky brown pop. For a Ninja this was an extremely embarrassing
moment, no
doubt, and wReamhack tried hard to restrain himself from errupting into uncontrollable laughter.
Ultimate Ninja gave wReamhack a piercing glare and said frustratedly,
"What the HECK do you want!?"
"Ummmm. UN, TimeWaster wants to know if at the party we can watch the
LNH special." wReamhack said grabbing a couple cases of caffeinated pop. Ultimate Ninja spying that wReamhack was taking the pop, asked
accusingly. "YOu wouldn't have happened to have placed all this pop in my office as some sort of JOKE! DID YOU!?"
Even had wReamhack been responsible, answering yes would not be the
smartest idea, and he speedily answered no as he rushed down the hall.
Then in
an undertone said, "Although it is pretty funny!"
Immediately he burst into laughter and ran down the hall toward the
rec.room. Ninja bush went whizzing by wReamhack's head and imbedded into
the
wall in front of him. One piece sliced open a case, spraying a now
pressurized
stream of pop down wReamhack's pant leg. By the time wReamhack arrived
back in
the rec.room he had an unsightly stream of pop running down his leg.
"Ewww! You know we do have bathrooms here!" Bad Timing Boy said
pointing out the embarrassing stain.
"It's just pop, Ultimate NInja is not in the best of moods!" wReamhack
feebly explained.
"Suuuure!" Bad Timing Boy nudged Timewaster Lad.
"We believe you." Cliche Dude added winking.
"You know bladder problems are nothing to be ashamed of" Organic Lass
said smiling.

* * ** * * * * * ** * *

Location: 10,000,000,000,000 Leagues under the Net.Sea at the secret
base of WildGNATs, the once mistaken for dead menaces have now risen to reterrorize the entire universe! But suddenly unforseen by the evil doers, outside a gun is trained on the hidden base. From the huge barrel is
launched
a very large torpedo!

"SHHHHRAAAAAKKKKKAAAAABBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!"

The entire base is destroyed all that is left are red ink stains in the
water and lots of fish food.
The mysterious shadowy-watery figure drifting back to the depths can be
heard saying, "Net.Justice is Served." (amid lots of bubble sounds)

************ *************** ************

"YO! Adrian!" the TV roared. Timewaster Lad went back to watching.
"Time Waster Lad why don't you try helping out here." wReamhack asked
in vain. Seeing it was hopeless to get productivity from TW lad he went
back
to ladeling ChokaCola down Incredible Unsleeping Man's throat. Still there
was
no response. Organic Lass looked at the patients worriedly.
"This is more serious than I thought," she said, getting out her I.V.
bags. "Dump the pop into these bags, we're going to have to get this to
their
systems intravenously."
Organic Lass plugged two brown bags into the arms of the two comatose
heros. The bags were drained almost immediately. Organic Lass's eyes
opened
wide. "I am gonna need a whole lot more pop! Hurry!"
"Cliche Dude, go get some more, FAST!" Organic Lass instructed nimbly
opening another case with her scapel. "Help me fill these bags, wReamhack." "Already there!" Cliche Dude said in typical cliche fashion and
instantly disappeared. Two second's later and Cliche Dude reappeared with
four
cases of caffeinated pop. He was laughing, and pointed at wReamhack as he laughed.
"You thought wReamhack had bladder problems!? YOu should see Ultimate
Ninja!!" Cliche Dude fell on the floor laughing.
"I have gotta see this," TimeWaster said getting up and stepping over
the two sleeping unsleepers.
"Hey guys, I hear Ultimate Ninja had a bladder explosion!" Timewaster
Lad yelled into one of the waiting rooms. Suddenly there was a stampede of heroes headed to the Ready Room.
Unsleeping Man and Late Night Lad's systems started to slow the
caffeine absorbsion and they started to stir. Organic Lass excitedly handed them each a six pack of Jolt and instructed them to drink it.
"I have to go see something now." Organic Lass said smiling, and
headed for Ultimate Ninja's Ready Room.
"Where are they all going?" Late Nite Lad inquired of wReamhack.
"Oh Ultimate Ninja's bladder explo... errr... I mean Ultimate Ninja had
an accident with pop."
"I gotta see this!" Incredible Unsleeping Man said excitedly jumping
from his cot.
"Me too." Said Late Night Lad.
"But what about..." wReamhack protested holding two empty I.V. sacks.

*** *** *** *** *** *** * *** * *

"You have come seeking answers!"
All-Knowing-Last-Chance-Whiner-Destiny Woman proclaimed assuredly.
"No duh, I think you already said that!" Cheesecake Eater Lad said
even more cynically.
"I sense you are skeptic!" AKLCWD Woman declared again pointing at
CheeseCake Eater Lad.
"Gee, she's good." Parking Karma Kid said somewhat amazed.
Suddenly an elbow slammed PK Kid in the ribs, hard. "You idiot! You
are so gullible! Anyone and their dog could tell I am skeptical of this
stupid
fiasco, you are exposing me to!"
"I knew that!" PK Kid said trying to recover.
"I did too!" Cried AKLCWD Woman.
"What is this going to cost me?!" Cheesecake Eater Lad said.
"Five dollars the first minute, two fifty each additional minute!"
an
announcer voice came from a speaker above the table they were seated at.
"Oh great, that means that I can speak with you for thirty four
seconds.
"I sense this your first time!" AKLCWD Woman said covering her eyes
with her hands.
"Gee, she's really really g..." Cheesecake Eater shot a bitter glare
at PK Kid cutting him short.
"So what if it's my first time."
"It means you get our introductory bonus of five free minutes!" AKLCWD
Woman said smiling.
"Oh joy... that means I get to stay here longer..." CheeseCake eater
was not happy.
"I sense you are not happy. Concentrate, open your feelings to me! I
will tell you your future!"
"Now it's getting good!" PK Kid said excitedly dawning a bucket of
popcorn from nowhere in particular.
"I sense your name is CheeseCake Eater Lad!" AKLCWD Woman said
knodding.
"Now WAIT one second here! You have known me since you joined the
Legion! You can't SENSE that!? You KNEW that!?" protested the cheesecake lover.
"It is true, is it not!?" AKLCWD Woman said calmly.
"yeah, but..."
"Then I have sensed correctly!" All Knowing Last chance whiner destiny
woman proclaimed triumphantly! Before Cheesecake Eater could protest,
AKLCWD
woman put her hands to her eyes and then the lights dimmed. Only a dim spotlight remained on her face, magnifying her pointed facial features. As
she
withdrew her eyes to PK Kid's shock and Cheesecake Eater's migrain headache, AKLCWD Woman had no pupils, instead her eyes were all white! Cheesecake
eater
sighed again, as if he could tell that all she had done was place white
opaque
contacts over her eyes, but AKLCWD Woman cried loudly.
"AIEEEEEEOOOOGA! I feel deep in my core that you like..." she cried.
"yes, yes?!?" PK Kid was on the edge of his seat.
"CHEESECAKE!" All Knowing Last Chance Whiner Destiny Woman declared assuredly.
"That's it! I am leaving!" Cheesecake Eater Lad rose to his feet, in
haste he knocked PK Kid back onto the floor.
AKLCWD Woman cried to him as CCELad stormed out. "Wait! You still
have three and a half minutes still free!"
Parking Karma Kid scrambled to his feet and ran after him. "Wait, she
was just getting warmed up!"
CEL stood in the doorway indignantly. "This was a crazy idea to let me
come here! I will never learn a thing about true love this way!"
"True love?" AKLCWD Woman looked perplexed and then said solemnly.
"True love shall thee allude till the day ye sacrifice the one ye lovest
most!"
CEL slammed the door and ran towards his quarters.
In the darkness of the Psychic Parlor, AKLCWD Woman stood alone.
"wait... Come back... that was a REAL prediction... "

****************************************************************************** LATER in the Evening the party has begun. ******************************************************************************

Alliterative Lass looked beautiful in her lovely pink Ninja suit.
Cheesecake Eater Lad was only depressed more, when she insisted on sitting
next to him. I hate this romance thing! Cheesecake Eater Lad thought to himself. I can't seem to figure it out EVER! Gee, alliterative Lass's
outfit
will match my jumbo party cheesecake perfectly! Hmmmm... Cheesecake Eater
Lad
stared at the huge tower of cheesecake in the center of the banquet table
and
dreamed wistfully.
The party roared into action. EVERYONE that was EVERYONE was there!
Ultimate Ninja came in his ceremonial dressy Ninja suit, which looked much better than the carbonated cola outfit he had been wearing earlier. UN was amazed at the turnout. Even some of the more obscure characters were
there.
"Hey, Ulti, I'd just like to say that my quarters are a bit cramped,
and I think I would like a window in my room." said an unfamiliar voice.
"who ARE you!?" UN said looking at a hero he had never beheld before.
"I am MIMIC LAD!" he said insulted.
"Well have you ever really been in a story?" Ultimate Ninja said
skeptically, not even attempting to be polite and act as if he had heard of him, or of his powers.
"well, not really..." Mimic Lad pouted.
"well then get out of my face..." Ultimate Ninja left the
presumptuous do-gooder to stew and headed to CheeseCake Eater Lad's table. Noticing aLLiterativbe laSS UN smiled, apreciating the pink ninja suit,
even if
there were beginning to be too many ninjas in the LNH.verse again.Then approaching Cheesecake Eater he said awkwardly. "I see that you have made another cheesecake."
"Yeah, isn't she a beauty?" Cheesecake Eater Lad gazed on in wonder.
"It looks nice." UN said calmly.
Parking Karma Kid was noticing the whole Alliterative Lass Cheesecake
Eater Lad interaction (that wasn't happening...) and began to get worried.
All his friend Cheesecake Eater could do, probably due to his nervosity, was stare at the cheesecake, and it was really beginning to get on Alliterative Lass's nerves. Remembering the words of the psychic, he thought to
himself...

"True love shall thee allude till the day ye sacrifice the one ye lovest
most!"

Gee, I wonder what that which he lovest the most could be??? Parking Karma
Kid
thought aimlessly, but then dropped the entire thought as BandWagon Chick walked by.
Ultimate Ninja walked to the front of the assembly hall and onto a
makeshift podium that Pocket man had found in a pocket somehow.
"All right I suppose we really ought to get started." then waiting for
the clamour to die down, Ultimate Ninja shot "glares of stunning doom" to
all
who would not shutup immediately. When the room had fallen quiet, Ultimate Ninja continued. "I have never been one for big speeches so I won't start now..."
A sigh of relief fell across the assemblage.
"All I want to say is thanks to all those I have fought along side with
and wish the LNH a grand first birthday."
Then the tone fell solemn.
"We have lost a few great friends over this past year, but we are
determined to keep up the fight. We will naturally miss Lost Cause Boy, Continuity Champ and the others.
"This year has been a year of beginnings for most of us. And some of
rebirth." Ultimate Ninja acknowleged Obscure Trivia Lad and the newly
returned
Marvel Zombie Boy.
"Here's to making the next year even better than the year before!"
Then raising a glass of slurpee to the air he shouted.
"LONG LIVE THE LNH!" a burst of excitementfilled the room as the entire
group joined in cheers. "NOW LET's Eat!"
The group began to dish out the Cheesecake, and pass drinks. Over the
monitor a bunch of static suddenly buzzed and then the local net.ropolis channel clicked into view. Familiar theme music filled the hall as the MacLaughlin Man group came on.
"What is this?" Ultimate Ninja said confused.
"Oh it's the LNH TV special I saw in comercial. It just happens to be
at the same time." Timewaster Lad said excitedly.
Suddenly a video clip of Ultimate Ninja and some of the other LNHer's
came on. "Don't I look great on TV!" Opinionated Lad said proudly.
Laughs and jeers filled the hall as the LNH enjoyed teasing their
colleagues as the showed on the cameras. Parking Karma Kid ducked in embarrassment as he was shown retreating in one battle while cheers for Deja Dude coming to the rescue washed out the laughter in another instance.
"THE LNH, a group of great heroes, sworn to save the universe?" The
announcer voice came on in the background. It was clearly the voice of MacLaughlin Man. "OR a bunch of federally money moochers that are doing the society more harm than good!?"
Suddenly the assembled LNH fell silent, and Ultimate Ninja gulped
nervously. "Turn it off!" yelled a few LNHers.
"No! if there is something to this story we should examine it!"
Ultimate Ninja instructed.
The TV continued...
"Recently an outbreak of vicious murders have been occuring, and the
one is lead to wonder, whether the LNH really has any care for these
citizens
being slaughtered. in fact, Even I was attacked by this assasin, and unfortunately my goodhearted stunt double decided to die in my place. This great person had to die because the LNH has not the competency to make this world a better place.
Ultimate Ninja shifted nervously as the villain continued his
accusations.
"Furthermore, the LNH has made no effort to save the lives of an old defenseless man in net.central park. One Columbian citizen, a group of underwater explorers, and a group of religious followers.
"WHat!?" Ultimate Ninja cried angrily in protest.
"I have the leader of the religious followers, Mr. wReamicus
Maximus as a guest today."
The camera showed a shadowed figure. Suddenly Contraption Man,
who had been wheeled in on a party gurney, began to convulse in fear.
"It's him! HE IS HERE! WE ARE ALL DOOMED!"
"Wheel him out of here, he's going crazy again!!" Ultimate Ninja
instructed, but Contraption Man protested.
"No! I realize now! I am not crazy! He came to the future
and stole the powers of Taskani's Son, who destroyed the future LNH!? I remember it all now! Run! Hide! He is more powerful than you expect!!
He will destroy us all."
Organic Lass gave Ultimate Ninja a look of "are you sure?"
"Well you can stay if you shut up!" Ultimate NInja said trying to
listen to the interview.
"And so you say many of your religious followers were slaughtered
by this assasin, and you barely escaped through a time portal! Aren't
those
the handiest things to have around!?"
"See! I told you!" Contraption Man piped,.
"AND where was the LNH during this time?" MacLaughlin Man grilled.
"Our sources say that Ultimate Ninja and the majority of the REAL LNHers
were
somewhere in the tropics, on VACATION, no doubt!"
"Yes, that is why our religious foundation is beginning to collect
funds for the LNH registration act!" wReamicus Maximus said anxiously.
"What would this plan entail?" MacLaughlin man rehearsed.
"We would require that all good heroes, whereever they may be
must have their entire life history and addresses published in publicly accessible databases, along with all their weaknesses detailed and
how easiest to capture and enslave them."
"That's it!? Why, that sounds perfectly reasonable!" MacLaughlin
Man crooned.
"Oh and they must wear purple beanies that make beeping noises,
so that everyone knows where they are!" wReamicus said smiling.
The LNH burst into commotion at the notion of having to wear purple
beanies.
"I look absolutely dreadful in purple!" cried BandWagon Chick!
"Beenies! I don't ware beenies!" cried Opinionated Lad.
"Oh I would love to see Ultimate NInja in a BEENY!" Laughed
Bad Timing Boy.
"Well, we are now open to phone calls..." MacLaughlin Man
declared.
"Hello? I think that the LNH Registration Act is
a great idea, I want to know where I can send my life's savings!"
"Well caller, send it to the Temple of extraordinary
enlightenment, C/O wReamicus Maximus' trust fund for the extermination
of the LNH, 171 N. 100 E. Hyde Park, Ut. 84318... Or you can call and
pledge money to 801-563-6316!"
"Wow, I bet there are a lot out there who will willfully pledge
to your cause... And we wish you luck... ... I will no doubt be
supporting your cause.
"Let's take another caller. Yes, caller you're on the air."
"Hello? I want to know if the beenies will all be purple, or
could they choose a color." Ultimate Ninja scanned the room, because
the voice was easily recognizable as that of Kid Poetry. He was no
longer in the room, so UN dashed out to the nearest phone.
"Well wReamicus?"
"Only PURPLE!" wReamicus said emphatically.
"Drat, Red is more my color, unless I am feeling BLUE."
"Is this an LNHer!?" MacLaughlin Man said anxiously like a
spider waiting for a juicy fly.
"Why, yes, and I just love your..." Kid poetry was cut off.
Ultimate Ninja's voice interrupted. "wReamicus! We KNOW
who you are!! Usurper! Your evil plan will not prosper, and if we
have to catch this killer to prove that we are the heroes, we will!"
The phoneline clicked and both MacLaughlin Man and wReamicus
Maximus smiled evilly. "OK folks, you heard that, if the killer isn't
caught, then they are obviously the criminals!"
"In addition, we will be campaigning for the LNH Registration
Act to be passed sometime this year, and so if they do not catch
the assasin by then, they will surely be the primary force to their
own demise!" wReamicus added excitedly.
"Well that is all we have for today, folks, but try next
week when we televise every movement the LNH makes to find this
killer!" MacLaughlin Man announced.

*******

"Oh great. You know what that means?" Deja Dude said to no
one in particular "The press will be hounding us the entire search.
We will not have a chance of surprising the assasin."
"And it's all Ultimate Ninja's fault!" Sarcastic Lad pointed
accusingly to UN and Kid poetry who was being escorted back into the
assembly hall.
Oh great. There goes the peace and quiet for this year.
Ultimate Ninja thought angrily.

******************************************************************************

wReamicus and MacLaughlin Man congratulated themselves. Not only
had they made the LNH look stupid, but they had increased their
grief...
"We are gonna be rich! You have no idea what the media can
do to stir the public into a frenzy! Everyone will want to donate!"
"Then that means we had best not screw this up."
"Either way we win!" MacLaughlin Man said triumphantly. "If
they catch the killer we win, if they don't we win! And the press
will hound them relentlessly, they will have no hope of finding the
killer!"
"Yes, but there is one way we win the biggest!" wReamicus
said anxiously.
"wha? you aren't suggesting we..." MacLaughlin Man cowered.
"We must capture the assasin! That way we can keep the LNH
for not saving us!" wReamicus announced joyously. "Then the LNH will
squirm for clues that we ourselves can forge, and my LNH Registration
Act will SURELY PASS! MUWHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!"
"muwhahahahaHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA"
The villains joined in to a chorus of evil laughter...

... Hardly the END! ...

****************************************************************************

wReam...

==========

Next Week: Something Something LNH!!!!!

==========

Arthur "Same Classic Channel. But Same Time? Probably not." Spitzer

--000000000000bbcdbe064a567cdd
Content-Type: text/html; charset="UTF-8"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

<div dir=3D"ltr"> And we're back in the past and can check the eyrie=
archive once again. Here's where you can find this and = more Ultimate Ninja Action!: <a href=3D"https://archives.eyrie.or= g/racc/lnh/Series/Ultimate.Ninja/">https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Seri= es/Ultimate.Ninja/</a> And it's Ultimate Ninja #10 by Raymon=
d "wReam" Bingham! Is it time for some more Net.Justice to=
be Served?! Is it time for some unfortunate Soda Pop Accidents?!! An=
d is it time to force all the LNH to wear Purple Beenies that beep all t=
he time (even the ones that don't look good in a beenie?!!!!!!!) = Find out in... =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 _ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| =
| =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0Classic =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| |=
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ =C2=A0 =C2=A0_ =C2=A0 =C2=A0___=
_ =C2=A0 =C2=A0___ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| |__=
=C2=A0 | [] | =C2=A0| [] | =C2=A0| | =C2=A0| [] | =C2=A0| _ \ =C2=A0 <b= r>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|____| =C2=A0 \__] =C2=A0=
=C2=A0\__ | =C2=A0|_| =C2=A0 \__/ =C2=A0 |_|\_\ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|| =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 |_| =C2= =A0OF NET.HEROES =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 ADVENTURES #403 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 Ultimate Nin=
ja #10 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 |= =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 \ =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 / =C2=A0 =C2=A0 \ | / =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 / + \ =C2=A0---- *----|\ = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|\--+ =C2=A0+---* + -- -- =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 / | =C2=A0 =C2=A0| =C2=A0\ =C2=A0 =C2=A0=
| | | =C2=A0| =C2=A0 | / =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ULTIMATE NINJA = #10 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2=A0| = =C2=A0 =C2=A0\ =C2=A0| | +--+ =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 \ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 | =C2= =A0 =C2=A0| =C2=A0|\ =C2=A0\| | +--+ =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2=A0| =C2=A0| =C2=A0\ =C2=A0 | | =C2=A0| =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0"MAKE A BIRTHDAY WISH!!!" =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2=A0|__|__ =C2=A0\/ =C2=A0=
| =C2=A0| =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 \|___| =C2=A0|___| =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 |_____________\ =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0<SPECIAL BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION> =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 | =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 \ =C2=A0 / =C2=A0 \ = =C2=A0/ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0\ =C2=A0 =C2=A0^ =C2=A0 / =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0/ =C2=A0 / \ =C2=A0 \ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 - - - =C2=A0 | * | =C2=A0- - - =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0\ =C2=A0 \#/ = =C2=A0 / =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0/ =C2=A0 | | =C2=A0\ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 / =C2=A0 \|/|/ =C2=A0\ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 ___________| |_______________ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 ./ * HAPPY . |/| BIRTHDAY * =C2=A0.*\. =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0( * . =C2=A0* . * vvvvv =C2=A0* . * =C2=A0. * .* ) =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|\_ .*LEGION OF NET.HEROES! * . _/| =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|V \___________________________/V | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|.VV . V . V =C2=A0 V . V =C2=A0V . V V .V .| =C2=A0=
=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0Q . VV =C2=A0 V =C2=A0 V =C2=A0 V =C2=A0V =C2=
=A0 V =C2=A0V =C2=A0V =C2=A0.D =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|\O . = =C2=A0. =C2=A0 . =C2=A0 . =C2=A0 . =C2=A0. =C2=A0 . . =C2=A0.O/| =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0|/\\_O___O___O___O___O___O___O_//\| _________=
|o \/ \_/ \_/ \_/ \_/ \_/ \_/ \/ o|___________________________________ = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0\ o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o = =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o o | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 8p o = =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 o =C2=A0 8o =C2=A0 by w= Ream... =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 \_o8o____o8o____o8o___= _o8o__P =C2=A0 1993 (C)opyright L.N.H. _________________________________= ______________________________________________ =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 "Cheesecake Eater lad that is amazing!" =C2=A0Parking Karm=
a kid said in amazement gazing up at a huge and fancily decorated cheese= cake. "Do you think so?=C2=A0 I don't know if it is awe inspir=
ing enough to merit being the cake of cakes!" Cheesecake-Eater flog= ged himself with delight.=C2=A0 He knew this culinary delight was a mast= erpiece. =C2=A0 "Oh come now it is only a birthday cake!" =C2=
=A0BadTiming boy said entering in mid conversation. "ONLY A BIR=
THDAY CAKE!?" fumed C-ELad. =C2=A0"This is THE birthday cake! <br= >The one for the celebration of the LNH being one year old!" =C2=A0<br=

"Whoopdeedooo!" =C2=A0BTBoy said raising an eyebrow pessimistic=

ally. =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 Cheesecake Eater Lad raised a kitchen=
knife at the unenthusiastic boy and gave off a threatening look, but PK=
Kid caught CheeseCake Eater's arm before he could throw the knife.= =C2=A0 Bad Timing Boy ran out of the room. "Boy!=C2=A0 You sure ha= ve been quite anxious lately.=C2=A0 I think you need to stop hanging aro= und Ultimate Ninja!=C2=A0 You are ready to kill something!" =C2=A0Park= ing Karma Kid said observanty. "You mean you are taking all thi= s stuff that's been going on, in stride?" =C2=A0CheeseCake eate=
r accused in disbelief. "What stuff?" =C2=A0PK Kid looked on.=
 "YOu know all this romance stuff.=C2=A0 I mean with Alliteration =
Lass and Occultism Kid, Panta and Ultimate Ninja, =C2=A0Organic Lass and=
Pliable Lad, or was that pocket man and Ultimate Ninja switched with, H= amster Man and Bandwagon chick, and Sister state the obvious and Master = Blaster or um was that ummm, and Renegade Programmer and his computer...=
or errrr..." =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad could feel his head start = spinning. =C2=A0 "Oh the ROMANCE THING!?" =C2=A0Parking Karma=
Kid said anxiously. =C2=A0"Well I will just wait until Bandwagon C= hick comes to her senses!=C2=A0 After all we are destined to love each o= ther!" "How do you know that!?" =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater =
said incredulously. "Oh I asked All-Knowing-Last-Chance-Whiner-Des= tiny Woman and she said it was soo..." =C2=A0PK kid said smiling.<b=

"Really?!=C2=A0 Wow, whenever I go ask her a question she answers i=

n weird riddles and I can never quite get the right interpretations!&quo=
t; "Well you do have to know how to interpret her speech!" = =C2=A0PK Kid said confidently. =C2=A0"Besides, it has gotten a whol=
e LOT easier to understand her now that she is one of the members of the=
Psychic Friend's Inter.Network!" "Maybe if you came with=
me, you would be able to provide a translation!!" =C2=A0Cheesecake=
Eater Lad said getting excited. "Ok, but first put the Birthday c= ake away, we don't want it to get spoiled." ************= **************************************************************** Ult= imate Ninja hadn't been to his ready room for quite a while.=C2=A0 He h=
ad been avoiding returning to being leader, but eventually the powers th=
at caused him to procrastinate the LNH maintenance had to be faced.=C2=
=A0 Things were pretty quiet around the base and so perhaps UN could get=
some paperwork done before the big anniversary bash started this evenin= g.=C2=A0 Aproaching his office he noticed tread marks in the carpet, lik=
e worn groves.=C2=A0 The groves went into his office. Someone had been =
in his office unauthorized!?=C2=A0 UN fumed.=C2=A0 He grabbed hold of th=
e door and cautiously opened it. =C2=A0 "WHAT THE HECK IS THIS MES=
S!?" =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja cried in alarm.=C2=A0 There was a mountai=
n of caffeinated drinks towering in the center of his room.=C2=A0 In the=
background UN could hear a distinct snickering sound with his keen ninja<b= r>ears (tm), and he sprang into the room to find the culprit of this traves= ty. But know one visible was in the room.=C2=A0 Unsheathing his Ginsu K= atana blade Ultimate ninja began to swing through the air slicing an occ= asional crate of soda as he attempted to pinpoint the source of the laug= hter.=C2=A0 Then concentrating he listened carefully to where the air mo= lecules were being displaced by some entity and struck at the invisible = foe, but before he could deliver the lethal blow, the ginsu Katana blade=
suddenly turned red hot.=C2=A0 UN yelped in pain and dropped it onto th=
e carpet that was now drenched with pop, from the crates UN had split op= en.=C2=A0 It sizzled back to coolness, UN picked up the blade.=C2=A0 Lis= tening carefully UN determined the Invisible entity had fled the room. = =C2=A0 Great, another invisible threat to the LNH's security, =C2= =A0Ultiamte Ninja thought impatiently. =C2=A0 "Captain CleanUp?= " =C2=A0UN called down to the central control room. UN stood in a p= uddle of pop disgustedly awaiting assitance. **********************=
******************************************************** wReamhack w= racked his brains as he watched the portly Renegade Programmer produce a=
program of pragmatic proportions. =C2=A0 "So in other words you c= ompile this pragma with a union because you want to see the summary solu= tion?" =C2=A0wReamhack squirmed. "No! =C2=A0what are you talk=
ing about.=C2=A0 It is done with my special algorithm here!=C2=A0 It is = sooo clear!" =C2=A0Renegade Programmer didn't look up from his mon= itor, and kept going. wReamhack watched frustratedly.=C2=A0 He didn&= #39;t have a clue, but being wReamhack he was determined to understand s= omething of the ways of hackers! "Why don't you go get me a Mi= croBurger!?" =C2=A0Renegade Programmer said hungrily. "ok.=
" wReamhack said unhappily. wReamhack left the central room and he= aded for the kitchen.=C2=A0 Passing the rec.lounge he stopped at a sight=
he had not seen for a very long time... more like forever!?=C2=A0 Incre= dible Unsleeping Man and Late Night Lad were asleep on the couch.=C2=A0 =
It was pretty late, or getting there, so late Night Lad should be up and=
just getting ready for a long night's vigil, not sound asleep! &qu= ot;Hey!=C2=A0 Timewaster!?=C2=A0 What is the deal!?" =C2=A0wReamhack s= aid pointing to the two sleeping beauties. =C2=A0 "Oh they have=
been sleeping for a couple days now." =C2=A0Timewaster said watchi=
ng the Home shopping channel. =C2=A0"I was gonna mention that they wer=
e not awake but I sorta got involved in my TV watching." =C2=A0 =
"HOLEE!" =C2=A0wReamhack cried in alarm.=C2=A0 Grabbing a com.un=
it wReamhack cried for help. =C2=A0"Medical emergency, Medical emer= gency!=C2=A0 Get Organic Lass to the rec.lounge immediately!" A=
few seconds later and Ori was at the side of the two sleeping heroes. =
"Is there any hope doctor?" =C2=A0Cliche Dude said arriving to he=
lp Organic Lass with a gurney. =C2=A0 "Yes, It isn't as ser= ious as you would think.=C2=A0 Their bodies have just gone into a sleepi=
ng coma." =C2=A0Organic Lass said confidently. =C2=A0 "Sounds=
pretty serious to me!?" =C2=A0wReamhack was not convinced. "= OH doctor, IS there a CURE!?" =C2=A0Cliched Dude said dramatically.<br=

"Yeah, all we need to do is get some Caffeine in their systems.&quot=

; "Caffeine?=C2=A0 That probably explains why they started sleepi= ng a day or so after Ultimate Ninja got rid of the pop machine and repla= ced it with a decaf commie slurpee machine!" =C2=A0Timewaster Lad s= aid indignantly. =C2=A0"stupid slurpees don't do half the job o=
f keeping me awake so I can watch more TV, that those caffeine drinks di= d..." "But where are we gonna get a caffeinated drink now tha=
t we don't have any in LNH.HQ?" =C2=A0wReamhack asked to no one=
in particular. "Try Ultimate Ninja's Office!" =C2=A0Capt=
ain cleanup said in passing. =C2=A0 "WHAT!?" =C2=A0the whole = group said in chorus. =C2=A0 "wReamhack, before you go see the big=
cheese about getting Caffeine, ask UN if we can watch the LNH special o=
n TV tonight!=C2=A0 It might be fun to see what special things are going=
on for our special anniversary party on TV?" Time Waster Lad decla= red out of the blue.=C2=A0 The sentence didn't make much sense eithe=
r, but wReamhack was in too much of a hurry to worry about semantics, and<b= r>ran to the office. ***********************************************= ******************************* "You know, ever since All-Know= ing-Last-Chance-Whiner-Destiny Woman talked with that weird group on TV,=
she has been even harder to understand!" CheeseCake Eater Lad sai=
d concerned. "What that Psychic Friends Inter.Network!?=C2=A0 Oh I=
think she has really gotten to be more open with her predictions...&quo=
t; =C2=A0Parking Karma Kid debated. "No.=C2=A0 All she has learned=
to do is talk about vague things that can be interpretted to your hear= t's delight!" =C2=A0 "Shhh.=C2=A0 She will sense you!&quo=
t; PK Kid shushed cautiously since they were pratically outside her divi= ning parlor. "Oh you take this too seriously." =C2=A0 Che=
esecake Eater and Parking Karma Kid entered the LNH.HQ.divining.shrine a=
nd sat in a couple of plush chairs. =C2=A0 =C2=A0The room was pretty dar=
k and a dark figure appeared in the back of the room across a table from=
a crystal ball that emanated its own light. =C2=A0 "Don't tur=
n away Cheesecake Eater Lad!=C2=A0 I sense that you are skeptic! That i=
s good!=C2=A0 Most people are skeptic, but I have a power, given to me by t= he Net.Powers.that.B and they will help you know what you want to know.&= quot; =C2=A0came a voice that sounded strangely like All-Knowing-Last-ch= ance-whiner-destiny woman. "Approach the crystal." =C2=A0 =
"Ok." =C2=A0Parking Karma Kid lifted his friend out of his seat =
and helped him to the chair where he was supposed to sit.=C2=A0 Cheeseca=
ke Eater resisted his help protesting and saying that he knew where to g= o. "I sense you come in search of answers!=C2=A0 You seek to know =
a question that you have thought about for some time!" =C2=A0AKLCWD=
Woman said gazing into the crystal. "No Duh!=C2=A0 Else I woul=
dn't have come here!" =C2=A0Cheesecake eater said twiddling his=
thumbs. ** *** **** *** ** * ** *** **** *** "Holeee.&=
quot; =C2=A0wReamhack backed away from Ultimate Ninja's Ready Room e= ntrance.=C2=A0 The carpet was brown and Ultimate Ninja was covered from hea=
d to toe in sticky brown pop.=C2=A0 For a Ninja this was an extremely em= barrassing moment, no doubt, and wReamhack tried hard to restrain himsel=
f from errupting into uncontrollable laughter. =C2=A0 Ultimate Ninja=
gave wReamhack a piercing glare and said frustratedly, "What the H= ECK do you want!?" =C2=A0 "Ummmm.=C2=A0 UN, TimeWaster wants =
to know if at the party we can watch the LNH special." =C2=A0wReamh= ack said grabbing a couple cases of caffeinated pop. =C2=A0 Ultimate Ni= nja spying that wReamhack was taking the pop, asked accusingly. "YO=
u wouldn't have happened to have placed all this pop in my office as=
some sort of JOKE!=C2=A0 DID YOU!?" =C2=A0 Even had wReamhack bee= n responsible, answering yes would not be the smartest idea, and he spee= dily answered no as he rushed down the hall.=C2=A0 Then in an undertone = said, "Although it is pretty funny!" =C2=A0 Immediately he bu=
rst into laughter and ran down the hall toward the rec.room.=C2=A0 Ninja=
bush went whizzing by wReamhack's head and imbedded into the wall i=
n front of him.=C2=A0 One piece sliced open a case, spraying a now pressuri= zed stream of pop down wReamhack's pant leg.=C2=A0 By the time wReam= hack arrived back in the rec.room he had an unsightly stream of pop runn= ing down his leg. =C2=A0 "Ewww!=C2=A0 You know we do have bathroom= s here!" Bad Timing Boy said pointing out the embarrassing stain. = =C2=A0 "It's just pop, Ultimate NInja is not in the best of mo=
ods!" wReamhack feebly explained. "Suuuure!" Bad Timi= ng Boy nudged Timewaster Lad. =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 "We belie=
ve you." =C2=A0Cliche Dude added winking. "You know bladder p=
roblems are nothing to be ashamed of" Organic Lass said smiling.<br= > * * ** * * * * * ** =C2=A0 =C2=A0 * =C2=A0 =C2=A0 * Location: =
10,000,000,000,000 Leagues under the Net.Sea at the secret base of WildG= NATs, the once mistaken for dead menaces have now risen to reterrorize t=
he entire universe!=C2=A0 But suddenly unforseen by the evil doers, outs= ide a gun is trained on the hidden base.=C2=A0 From the huge barrel is laun= ched a very large torpedo! =C2=A0 "SHHHHRAAAAAKKKKKAAAAABBB= OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!" =C2=A0 The entire base is de= stroyed all that is left are red ink stains in the water and lots of fis=
h food. The mysterious shadowy-watery figure drifting back to the depth=
s can be heard saying, "Net.Justice is Served." (amid lots of = bubble sounds) ************ *************** ************ =
"YO! Adrian!" the TV roared.=C2=A0 Timewaster Lad went back to wa= tching. "Time Waster Lad why don't you try helping out here.&q=
uot; =C2=A0wReamhack asked in vain.=C2=A0 Seeing it was hopeless to get = productivity from TW lad he went back to ladeling ChokaCola down Incredi= ble Unsleeping Man's throat.=C2=A0 Still there was no response.=C2=
=A0 Organic Lass looked at the patients worriedly. =C2=A0 "This is=
more serious than I thought," she said, getting out her I.V. bags.=
=C2=A0"Dump the pop into these bags, we're going to have to get t= his to their systems intravenously." Organic Lass plugged two b=
rown bags into the arms of the two comatose heros.=C2=A0 The bags were d= rained almost immediately.=C2=A0 Organic Lass's eyes opened wide. &q= uot;I am gonna need a whole lot more pop! Hurry!" "Cliche Dud=
e, go get some more, FAST!" =C2=A0Organic Lass instructed nimbly op= ening another case with her scapel. =C2=A0"Help me fill these bags, wR= eamhack." "Already there!" Cliche Dude said in typical c=
liche fashion and instantly disappeared.=C2=A0 Two second's later an=
d Cliche Dude reappeared with four cases of caffeinated pop.=C2=A0 He wa=
s laughing, and pointed at wReamhack as he laughed. =C2=A0 "You=
thought wReamhack had bladder problems!?=C2=A0 YOu should see Ultimate = Ninja!!" =C2=A0Cliche Dude fell on the floor laughing. =C2=A0 &quo= t;I have gotta see this," TimeWaster said getting up and stepping over= the two sleeping unsleepers. =C2=A0 "Hey guys, I hear Ultimate=
Ninja had a bladder explosion!" =C2=A0Timewaster Lad yelled into o=
ne of the waiting rooms.=C2=A0 Suddenly there was a stampede of heroes h= eaded to the Ready Room. =C2=A0 Unsleeping Man and Late Night Lad's=
systems started to slow the caffeine absorbsion and they started to sti= r.=C2=A0 Organic Lass excitedly handed them each a six pack of Jolt and = instructed them to drink it. =C2=A0 "I have to go see something no= w." =C2=A0Organic Lass said smiling, and headed for Ultimate Ninja&= #39;s Ready Room. "Where are they all going?" =C2=A0Late Nite=
Lad inquired of wReamhack. "Oh Ultimate Ninja's bladder explo= ... errr... I mean Ultimate Ninja had an accident with pop." &=
quot;I gotta see this!" =C2=A0Incredible Unsleeping Man said excitedly=
jumping from his cot. =C2=A0 "Me too." =C2=A0Said Late Ni= ght Lad. "But what about..." =C2=A0wReamhack protested holdin= g two empty I.V. sacks. *** *** *** *** *** *** * *** * * =C2=
=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 "You have come seeking answers!" All= -Knowing-Last-Chance-Whiner-Destiny Woman proclaimed assuredly. "N=
o duh, I think you already said that!" =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad said= even more cynically. =C2=A0 "I sense you are skeptic!" = =C2=A0AKLCWD Woman declared again pointing at CheeseCake Eater Lad. =
"Gee, she's good." =C2=A0Parking Karma Kid said somewhat amaz= ed. Suddenly an elbow slammed PK Kid in the ribs, hard. =C2=A0"You=
idiot!=C2=A0 You are so gullible!=C2=A0 Anyone and their dog could tell=
I am skeptical of this stupid fiasco, you are exposing me to!" =C2= =A0 "I knew that!" =C2=A0PK Kid said trying to recover. &=
quot;I did too!" Cried AKLCWD Woman. =C2=A0 "What is this goi= ng to cost me?!" =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad said. =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 "Five dollars the first minute, two fifty each additional m= inute!" an announcer voice came from a speaker above the table they=
were seated at. "Oh great, that means that I can speak with you f= or thirty four seconds. "I sense this your first time!" = =C2=A0AKLCWD Woman said covering her eyes with her hands. =C2=A0 &qu= ot;Gee, she's really really g..." =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater shot a bi= tter glare at PK Kid cutting him short. "So what if it's my=
first time." "It means you get our introductory bonus of fiv=
e free minutes!" =C2=A0AKLCWD Woman said smiling. =C2=A0 "= Oh joy... =C2=A0that means I get to stay here longer..." CheeseCake ea= ter was not happy. "I sense you are not happy.=C2=A0 Concentrat=
e, open your feelings to me! =C2=A0I will tell you your future!" = =C2=A0 "Now it's getting good!" PK Kid said excitedly daw=
ning a bucket of popcorn from nowhere in particular. =C2=A0 "I =
sense your name is CheeseCake Eater Lad!" =C2=A0AKLCWD Woman said k= nodding. "Now WAIT one second here!=C2=A0 You have known me since = you joined the Legion!=C2=A0 You can't SENSE that!?=C2=A0 You KNEW t= hat!?" =C2=A0protested the cheesecake lover. "It is true,=
is it not!?" =C2=A0AKLCWD Woman said calmly. "yeah, but...&q= uot; =C2=A0 "Then I have sensed correctly!" =C2=A0All Knowing=
Last chance whiner destiny woman proclaimed triumphantly!=C2=A0 Before = Cheesecake Eater could protest, AKLCWD woman put her hands to her eyes a=
nd then the lights dimmed.=C2=A0 Only a dim spotlight remained on her fa= ce, magnifying her pointed facial features.=C2=A0 As she withdrew her ey=
es to PK Kid's shock and Cheesecake Eater's migrain headache, AK= LCWD Woman had no pupils, instead her eyes were all white!=C2=A0 Cheesecake=
eater sighed again, as if he could tell that all she had done was place=
white opaque contacts over her eyes, but AKLCWD Woman cried loudly. =
"AIEEEEEEOOOOGA!=C2=A0 I feel deep in my core that you like..." =
she cried. "yes, yes?!?" PK Kid was on the edge of his seat.<= br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 "CHEESECAKE!" =C2=A0All Knowing La=
st Chance Whiner Destiny Woman declared assuredly. =C2=A0 "That=
's it!=C2=A0 I am leaving!" =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad rose to his=
feet, in haste he knocked PK Kid back onto the floor. =C2=A0 AKLCWD=
Woman cried to him as CCELad stormed out. =C2=A0"Wait!=C2=A0 You stil=
l have three and a half minutes still free!" Parking Karma Ki=
d scrambled to his feet and ran after him. =C2=A0"Wait, she was jus=
t getting warmed up!" CEL stood in the doorway indignantly. =C2=A0= "This was a crazy idea to let me come here!=C2=A0 I will never lear=
n a thing about true love this way!" "True love?" =C2=A0= AKLCWD Woman looked perplexed and then said solemnly. "True love s= hall thee allude till the day ye sacrifice the one ye lovest most!"<br=

CEL slammed the door and ran towards his quarters. In the darkness of=

the Psychic Parlor, AKLCWD Woman stood alone. "wait...=C2=A0 Come=
back... that was a REAL prediction... " *********************=
********************************************************* LATER in the E= vening the party has begun. ********************************************= ********************************** Alliterative Lass looked beaut= iful in her lovely pink Ninja suit. Cheesecake Eater Lad was only depres= sed more, when she insisted on sitting next to him.=C2=A0 I hate this r= omance thing!=C2=A0 Cheesecake Eater Lad thought to himself.=C2=A0 I can= 't seem to figure it out EVER!=C2=A0 Gee, alliterative Lass's outfi= t will match my jumbo party cheesecake perfectly!=C2=A0 Hmmmm... Cheesec= ake Eater Lad stared at the huge tower of cheesecake in the center of t=
he banquet table and dreamed wistfully. =C2=A0 The party roared int=
o action.=C2=A0 EVERYONE that was EVERYONE was there! Ultimate Ninja ca=
me in his ceremonial dressy Ninja suit, which looked much better than th=
e carbonated cola outfit he had been wearing earlier.=C2=A0 UN was amaze=
d at the turnout.=C2=A0 Even some of the more obscure characters were there=
. "Hey, Ulti, I'd just like to say that my quarters are a bit=
cramped, and I think I would like a window in my room." =C2=A0said=
an unfamiliar voice. "who ARE you!?" =C2=A0UN said looking a=
t a hero he had never beheld before. "I am MIMIC LAD!" he sai=
d insulted. =C2=A0 "Well have you ever really been in a story?&quo= t; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja said skeptically, not even attempting to be poli=
te and act as if he had heard of him, or of his powers. "well, = not really..." =C2=A0Mimic Lad pouted. =C2=A0 "well then get = out of my face..." =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja left the presumptuous do-go= oder to stew and headed to CheeseCake Eater Lad's table. Noticing a= LLiterativbe laSS UN smiled, apreciating the pink ninja suit, even if th= ere were beginning to be too many ninjas in the LNH.verse again.Then app= roaching Cheesecake Eater he said awkwardly. =C2=A0"I see that you hav=
e made another cheesecake." "Yeah, isn't she a beauty?= " =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad gazed on in wonder. =C2=A0 "It l=
ooks nice." =C2=A0UN said calmly. =C2=A0 Parking Karma Kid was not=
icing the whole Alliterative Lass Cheesecake Eater Lad interaction (that=
wasn't happening...) =C2=A0and began to get worried. All his frien=
d Cheesecake Eater could do, probably due to his nervosity, was stare at=
the cheesecake, and it was really beginning to get on Alliterative Lass= 's nerves.=C2=A0 Remembering the words of the psychic, he thought to hi= mself... "True love shall thee allude till the day ye sacrifice=
the one ye lovest most!" Gee, I wonder what that which he love=
st the most could be???=C2=A0 Parking Karma Kid thought aimlessly, but t= hen dropped the entire thought as BandWagon Chick walked by. Ultimat=
e Ninja walked to the front of the assembly hall and onto a makeshift po= dium that Pocket man had found in a pocket somehow. =C2=A0 "All ri= ght I suppose we really ought to get started." then waiting for the=
clamour to die down, Ultimate Ninja shot "glares of stunning doom&quo=
t; to all who would not shutup immediately.=C2=A0 When the room had fal= len quiet, Ultimate Ninja continued. =C2=A0"I have never been one f=
or big speeches so I won't start now..." A sigh of relief f=
ell across the assemblage. "All I want to say is thanks to all tho= se I have fought along side with and wish the LNH a grand first birthday= ." Then the tone fell solemn. =C2=A0 "We have lost a few =
great friends over this past year, but we are determined to keep up the = fight.=C2=A0 We will naturally miss Lost Cause Boy, Continuity Champ and=
the others. =C2=A0 "This year has been a year of beginnings for m= ost of us.=C2=A0 And some of rebirth." =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja acknowl= eged Obscure Trivia Lad and the newly returned Marvel Zombie Boy. =C2=A0=
 "Here's to making the next year even better than the year bef=
ore!" Then raising a glass of slurpee to the air he shouted. &=
quot;LONG LIVE THE LNH!" a burst of excitementfilled the room as the e= ntire group joined in cheers. =C2=A0"NOW LET's Eat!" =C2= =A0 The group began to dish out the Cheesecake, and pass drinks.=C2=A0 = Over the monitor a bunch of static suddenly buzzed and then the local ne= t.ropolis channel clicked into view.=C2=A0 Familiar theme music filled t=
he hall as the MacLaughlin Man group came on. =C2=A0 "What is t=
his?" =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja said confused. "Oh it's the LN=
H TV special I saw in comercial.=C2=A0 It just happens to be at the same=
time." =C2=A0Timewaster Lad said excitedly. =C2=A0 Suddenly a vid= eo clip of Ultimate Ninja and some of the other LNHer's came on. =C2= =A0"Don't I look great on TV!" =C2=A0Opinionated Lad said pro= udly. =C2=A0 Laughs and jeers filled the hall as the LNH enjoyed teasin=
g their colleagues as the showed on the cameras. =C2=A0 Parking Karma Ki=
d ducked in embarrassment as he was shown retreating in one battle while=
cheers for Deja Dude coming to the rescue washed out the laughter in an= other instance. "THE LNH, a group of great heroes, sworn to save t=
he universe?" =C2=A0The announcer voice came on in the background.= =C2=A0 It was clearly the voice of MacLaughlin Man. =C2=A0"OR a bun=
ch of federally money moochers that are doing the society more harm than=
good!?" =C2=A0 Suddenly the assembled LNH fell silent, and Ultima=
te Ninja gulped nervously. =C2=A0"Turn it off!" =C2=A0yelled a=
few LNHers. "No! if there is something to this story we should ex=
amine it!" Ultimate Ninja instructed. The TV continued... =
"Recently an outbreak of vicious murders have been occuring, and the<b= r>one is lead to wonder, whether the LNH really has any care for these citi= zens being slaughtered. =C2=A0in fact, Even I was attacked by this assas= in, and unfortunately my goodhearted stunt double decided to die in my = place.=C2=A0 This great person had to die because the LNH has not the c= ompetency to make this world a better place. Ultimate Ninja shifted=
nervously as the villain continued his accusations. "Furtherm= ore, the LNH has made no effort to save the lives of an old defenseless=
man in net.central park.=C2=A0 One Columbian citizen, a group of under= water explorers, and a group of religious followers. "WHat!?&quot=
; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja cried angrily in protest. "I have the leade= r of the religious followers, Mr. wReamicus Maximus as a guest today.&q= uot; The camera showed a shadowed figure.=C2=A0 Suddenly Contraption Ma=
n, who had been wheeled in on a party gurney, began to convulse in fear=
. =C2=A0 "It's him!=C2=A0 HE IS HERE!=C2=A0 WE ARE ALL DOOMED!&= quot; "Wheel him out of here, he's going crazy again!!" =
=C2=A0Ultimate Ninja instructed, but Contraption Man protested. &qu= ot;No!=C2=A0 I realize now!=C2=A0 I am not crazy!=C2=A0 He came to the futu=
re and stole the powers of Taskani's Son, who destroyed the future = LNH!?=C2=A0 I remember it all now!=C2=A0 Run!=C2=A0 Hide! He is more po= werful than you expect!! =C2=A0 He will destroy us all." =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 Organic Lass gave Ultimate Ninja a look of "are you sure?"=
 "Well you can stay if you shut up!" =C2=A0Ultimate NInja sai=
d trying to listen to the interview. "And so you say many of y= our religious followers were slaughtered by this assasin, and you barel=
y escaped through a time portal!=C2=A0 Aren't those the handiest th= ings to have around!?" =C2=A0 "See! I told you!" =C2=A0C= ontraption Man piped,. "AND where was the LNH during this time?&qu=
ot; =C2=A0MacLaughlin Man grilled. "Our sources say that Ultimate = Ninja and the majority of the REAL LNHers were somewhere in the tropics,=
on VACATION, no doubt!" "Yes, that is why our religious foun=
dation is beginning to collect funds for the LNH registration act!&quot=
; =C2=A0wReamicus Maximus said anxiously. "What would this plan en= tail?" =C2=A0MacLaughlin man rehearsed. "We would require tha=
t all good heroes, whereever they may be must have their entire life his= tory and addresses published in publicly accessible databases, along wit=
h all their weaknesses detailed and how easiest to capture and enslave = them." "That's it!?=C2=A0 Why, that sounds perfectly reas= onable!" =C2=A0MacLaughlin Man crooned. "Oh and they must =
wear purple beanies that make beeping noises, so that everyone knows whe=
re they are!" =C2=A0wReamicus said smiling. The LNH burst into com= motion at the notion of having to wear purple beanies. =C2=A0 "= I look absolutely dreadful in purple!" =C2=A0cried BandWagon Chick!<br=

"Beenies!=C2=A0 I don't ware beenies!" =C2=A0cried Opiniona=

ted Lad. "Oh I would love to see Ultimate NInja in a BEENY!" = =C2=A0Laughed Bad Timing Boy. "Well, we are now open to phone = calls..." =C2=A0MacLaughlin Man declared. "Hello?=C2=A0 I=
think that the LNH Registration Act is a great idea, I want to know wh= ere I can send my life's savings!" "Well caller, send it =
to the Temple of extraordinary enlightenment, C/O wReamicus Maximus&#39=
; trust fund for the extermination of the LNH, 171 N. 100 E. Hyde Park, = Ut. 84318... Or you can call and pledge money to 801-563-6316!" =
"Wow, I bet there are a lot out there who will willfully pledge t=
o your cause...=C2=A0 And we wish you luck... =C2=A0... I will no doubt be<= br>supporting your cause. "Let's take another caller.=C2=A0 Ye= s, caller you're on the air." "Hello?=C2=A0 I want to kno=
w if the beenies will all be purple, or could they choose a color."=
=C2=A0Ultimate Ninja scanned the room, because the voice was easily re= cognizable as that of Kid Poetry.=C2=A0 He was no longer in the room, s=
o UN dashed out to the nearest phone. "Well wReamicus?" &=
quot;Only PURPLE!" =C2=A0wReamicus said emphatically. "Drat, = Red is more my color, unless I am feeling BLUE." =C2=A0 "Is t=
his an LNHer!?" =C2=A0MacLaughlin Man said anxiously like a spider=
waiting for a juicy fly. "Why, yes, and I just love your..."=
=C2=A0Kid poetry was cut off. Ultimate Ninja's voice interrupted. =
=C2=A0"wReamicus!=C2=A0 We KNOW who you are!!=C2=A0 Usurper!=C2=A0=
Your evil plan will not prosper, and if we have to catch this killer to=
prove that we are the heroes, we will!" The phoneline clicked and=
both MacLaughlin Man and wReamicus Maximus smiled evilly. =C2=A0"O=
K folks, you heard that, if the killer isn't caught, then they are o= bviously the criminals!" "In addition, we will be campaigning=
for the LNH Registration Act to be passed sometime this year, and so if=
they do not catch the assasin by then, they will surely be the primary=
force to their own demise!" =C2=A0wReamicus added excitedly. =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 "Well that is all we have for today=
, folks, but try next week when we televise every movement the LNH makes=
to find this killer!" =C2=A0MacLaughlin Man announced. *=
****** "Oh great.=C2=A0 You know what that means?" =C2=A0= Deja Dude said to no one in particular "The press will be hounding=
us the entire search. =C2=A0 We will not have a chance of surprising th=
e assasin." "And it's all Ultimate Ninja's fault!&quo= t; =C2=A0Sarcastic Lad pointed accusingly to UN and Kid poetry who was = being escorted back into the assembly hall. Oh great.=C2=A0 There g=
oes the peace and quiet for this year. =C2=A0 Ultimate Ninja thought ang= rily. **************************************************************= **************** wReamicus and MacLaughlin Man congratulated themsel= ves.=C2=A0 Not only had they made the LNH look stupid, but they had inc= reased their grief... =C2=A0 "We are gonna be rich!=C2=A0 You = have no idea what the media can do to stir the public into a frenzy!=C2= =A0 Everyone will want to donate!" "Then that means we had be=
st not screw this up." "Either way we win!" =C2=A0MacLau= ghlin Man said triumphantly. =C2=A0"If they catch the killer we wi=
n, if they don't we win!=C2=A0 And the press will hound them relent= lessly, they will have no hope of finding the killer!" "Y=
es, but there is one way we win the biggest!" wReamicus said anxio= usly. "wha? =C2=A0you aren't suggesting we..." =C2=A0MacL=
aughlin Man cowered. "We must capture the assasin!=C2=A0 That way =
we can keep the LNH for not saving us!" =C2=A0wReamicus announced = joyously. =C2=A0"Then the LNH will squirm for clues that we oursel= ves can forge, and my LNH Registration Act will SURELY PASS!=C2=A0 MUWH= AHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!" =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 &quo= t;muwhahahahaHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA" T=
he villains joined in to a chorus of evil laughter... ... Hardl=
y the END! ... *****************************************************= *********************** wReam... =3D=3D=3D=
=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D Next Week: =C2=A0Something Something LNH!!!!!<= br> =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D Arthur "Same Classic Chan= nel.=C2=A0 But Same Time?=C2=A0 Probably not." Spitzer </div>

--000000000000bbcdbe064a567cdd--
--- Synchronet 3.21d-Linux NewsLink 1.2

Who's Online

System Info

Sysop:	Amessyroom
Location:	Fayetteville, NC
Users:	65
Nodes:	6 (0 / 6)
Uptime:	01:20:18
Calls:	862
Files:	1,311
D/L today:	10 files (20,373K bytes)
Messages:	264,187

LNH: Classic LNH Adventures #403: Ultimate Ninja #10

Who's Online

System Info