From Newsgroup: rec.arts.comics.creative

On Sun, Jan 12, 2025 at 3:59rC>PM Arthur Spitzer <arspitzer2@gmail.com> wrote: <snip>

And it's The Intro Without a Name #1-2 by Ken Schmidt!
Is it time for a villain in shiny armor and a blue cape to
conquer the Net?! Is it time for some henchmen that have
a thing for words that end in -or and -er?! And is it
time for some Time?!!!

BACK TO IT! :D Since I'm far enough back that I'm before the Eternal
September connection got shined up, here's the original post: https://lists.eyrie.org/mailman3/hyperkitty/list/racc@lists.eyrie.org/message/C4MQRSJ7VS26H3D6HJVU4A3XM6CZA5V3/

With shining armor and a royal blue cape billowing behind him, he purposefully entered the room where his minions were waiting. Even as he came
to a stop his cape billowed around him and he began to speak:
"The time is right, we put the plan into action now!" He punctuated
his remark with a clenched fist. "Webs Tor, commence phase one, Webster put him into place!"

Tsar Chasm! :D His first senses-smashing appearance!

When he finished his sentence his two minions, one a non-descipt man
with average build, height, and brown hair, the other a very small, young looking, and disgustingly cute black male,

Okay, nowadays, audiences probably won't realize the "disgustingly
cute black male" is a reference to the TV series Webster: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Webster_(TV_series)

Ultimate Ninja was becoming upset, he had been wandering the hq for a while and had not run into anyone.

He needed to infodump about Magic cards to *somebody* goddammit

"Lesse, some people are out on missions, and a few are out shopping."

"Shopping???"

I'm not sure why he's shocked that LNHers shop. X>

"Well not everyone is gone," LNL said as he turned to check who was in "Deductive Logic Man is here, so is Old Comics Man, and..." as LNL looked up to
tell Ultimate Ninja who else was in the building, he realized that UN had quietly left the room. 'I hate it when he does that!' LNL thought to himself.

hehehe, the classic Batman trick

"I want to join and offer my services. My name is Time, pleased to
meet you." Time extended his hand.

"Time, huh. Never heard of you." UN just stared at the man. "What
are your powers, stopping time, temporal displacement, what?"

"I don't have any powers," Time brought his hand back sheepishly
"I'm a doctor." He finished with a smile.

"A doctor? If you are a doctor, what kind of name is 'Time'?

"It is a good code name, uh... I am supposed to have a code name in
order to be a hero, right?"

"I suppose you do, buy why Time? Why not something REMOTELY related
to a medical field?"

"Don't you get it? That's Time as in 'Time heals all wounds', pretty
catchy, eh?"

This bit has been long stuck in my head. As a teenager, I thought it
was pretty clever. X>

"Excuse me, Deductive Logic Man, but did you drop this? I found it
in the hallway." Time had a small device in his hand, which he extended to Deductive Logic Man. As he handed the device to Deductive Logic Man, he ran his thumb over it and a light came on.

"I don't think I did. Hmm... let me see tha..." Deductive Logic
Man vanished as soon as he touched the device.

Time smiled. "Oh, yes, I remember now. That is the teleporter beacon
that Webster uses. How silly of me to forget."

DUN DUN DUNNNN... I love it.

"My name is TSAR CHASM." As he said his name one of his hands
clenched into a fist and punched the air above his head, causing Deductive Logic Man to duck. "Oops. sorry about that, but this armor sometimes has its own opinion of theatrics."

Heeheehee

"Uh, thats OK," Deductive Logic Man looked sideways at his captor.
"Sarcasm? Isn't that idea already being used?"

"No, not Sarcasm, Tsar Chasm, two words. You know, like old Russian nobility, and a big trench. Not like Sarcastic Lad."

X3 This is really good dialogue from Ken Schmidt's very first effort.
(Also, I apparently forgot this was how you pronounced his name right
after reading this. X3)

A third person in the room distracted Deductive Logic Man from trying
to figure out what the name meant. It was a small, black, and disgustingly cute
boy who was staring at the small device that he was still holding in his hand.
Deductive Logic Man thought for a moment and realized something. "That little
kid is a teleporter, this must be a signal of some kind, and that Time guy must
be working with you!

Excellent, this is exactly the kind of deductive leap he'd make

"The LNH will soon have its hands full once I use ... THIS!!" Tsar
Chasm pivoted, catching his cape on one of his arms, as he dramatically gestured at a rather large and complex-looking machine.

Deductive Logic Man couldn't believe his eyes. "Is that a ... a
KIRBIAN DEVICE???"

In response Tsar Chasm just smiled and looked toward his machine. He
began to nod his head. "No, no it isn't, its just a bunch of old plot devices I
found on one of the movie groups that I have modified.

...this anticlimactic reaction is funny, but that probably wasn't
intentional. X3

"You mean because I would see through your scheme to break into our computers?" Deductive Logic Man stood with a smug smile on his face.

"I see your name is well deserved. Tell me, how did you come up with
that?" A predatory smile appeared on Tsar Chasm's face.

"Simple, name something else both worth the trouble, and organized
enough in our hq worth taking."

Yeah valid o3o

"My dear Deductive Logic Man, you underestimate your own value. I have brought you here to aid me in my planning to bring peace to the net. Just image, no more flame wars, everyone would get along." Tsar Chasm had a sincere
tone, but something didn't sound right to Deductive Logic Man.

"Just how do you intend to bring this peace about?"

"Why by conquering the net, of course. With me in charge no one would disagree because I would have the only opinion."

This is such an accurate Kind of Guy, especially in the early internet
where right-wing movements weren't yet trying to actively recruit
dudes with this attitude.

"There are too many people using the net, how do you propose to keep
them all under your control?"

"That is what I need you for. Using your dedctive powers you could
reason out the best way for this to be accmoplished.

Including this idea of Rational Planning.

Deductive Logic Man had no intention of going along with this plan but
had decided to try and milk this guy for all of the information he could.

Seriously, this is some smart writing.

He pulled a
cord out and plugged it into the computer and held down one of the four buttons
inside the watch. Deductive Logic Man looked at the computer and realized it was running a dictionary program, the word that came up was 'smelter'. Webster
broke his connection with the computer and touched the button again.

"Throw this at him." Tsar Chasm's voice had broken Deductive Logic Man
out of his observation. Deductive Logic man took the piece of metal that was offered to him and tossed it lazily at the small black boy. Half way in its flight the metal had melted and fallen harmlessly to the ground.

This is some cool theming, and also a good way to keep it from getting
too overpowered.

"I'm not a bad guy, I'm just goal oriented...to an extreme." Tsar
Chasm said menacingly.

This is definitely a good "thesis statement" on early Tsar Chasm.
Honestly this story is kind of blowing me away

"I take it you are not interested in joining me."

"No, I am not, and you'll have to kill me to stop me from telling the
legion all I know about you and your buddies."

Admittedly, this is less smart writing. X>; But still, again, for a
first story...

I couldn't care less if you told the LNH about me, I hope you do. They will realize that they can't stop me. That knowledge will aid me everytime your pathetic group tries to stop me.

Oh buddy, you don't know how pigheaded these people are
Drew "but you're gonna find out" Nilium
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