• LNH: Classic LNH Adventures #395: Jungle Cheesecake Part Five

    From Arthur Spitzer@arspitzer2@gmail.com to rec.arts.comics.creative on Sun Nov 16 20:46:18 2025
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    And we're back in the past and can check the eyrie archive
    once again.


    Here's where you can find this and more Ultimate Ninja
    Action!:

    https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Series/Ultimate.Ninja/


    And some more Raymond "wReam" Bingham doing Ultimate
    Ninja #8!


    Can it be -- is Cannon Fodder -- DEAD?!! But Who Did It?!!
    And will Bandwagon Chick ever find that guy that isn't
    full of hormones that just wants to cuddle -- and perhaps
    likes to run around in a big hamster wheel while stuffing
    his cheeks full of sunflower seeds?!!!!

    Find out in...



    _
    | | Classic
    | | =
    | | ____ ____ _ ____ ___
    | |__ | [] | | [] | | | | [] | | _ \

    |____| \__] \__ | |_| \__/ |_|\_\
    ||
    |_| OF NET.HEROES

    ADVENTURES #395



    =====================
    Jungle Cheesecake Part Five
    =====================




    (Ultimate Ninja #8 (LNH (C)opyright 1993)


    OnomatoPuweeha Person gasped as she viewed the grandeur of the secret
    mountain
    base that Lagneto kept. It was in the heart of the antarctic land heated by sun workstation servers (those things emit lots of heat!) where dinosaurs
    still
    roamed the earth... I was called the Savage Place! The mountain wall
    opened to
    reveal the innards of a very technobabbly advanced base. Lagneto was
    greeted
    with a sinister smile by Pylon and Girl Next Door.
    "Who's the new recruit?!" Girl Next Door said looking over the
    nondescript O-PP.
    "That is none of your concern! Soon she will be different! I must
    find where the Jungle of KLAG is! You assemble the others, I want them
    close if
    there is need for a strike." Lagneto commanded and Pylon and Girl Next Door hastily left to assemble the others. "Now my dear, come with me."
    Through a maze of twisted metalic passages and convoluted doorways they traveled until OnomatoPuweeha Person's head was spinning. She gave up
    trying
    to find a way out, about the time the two entered a very large hall with a hologram projector in the center of the open room.
    "Scan access names to an island of KLAG and display on main view
    hologram!" Lagneto said abruptly into the empty room. The computers buzzed with excitement on command and soon an image began to form in the center of
    the
    room. The image was a satellite topographical map.
    As the image materialized it became more and more obvious that Lagneto
    knew where it was. A worried look came across his face and then like then
    in
    hysterical laughter he blurted out. "Hahahahaha! Do you know where this
    is!? This is the island that I crashed those dogooders from the LNH!"
    "BUT They are dead aren't they!?" Onomato-Puweeha Person said
    inquisitively.
    "You my dead have not been doing this as long as I have, trust me, they
    are alive." Lagneto brooded. "And if they aren't their friends will no
    doubt
    be searching for them."
    "What will we do?!"
    "Assemble the troops! We will strike anything that moves!" Lagneto
    said madly. Then he mused in a tone of irony. "I wonder if there were survivors... Could they even survive the cannibal nations living on the
    island? Hmmmm..."

    * * * * * * * * *

    "GAAAAHHH!!!" Bad Timing boy was the first to wake in the morning.
    "HE... He... He's DEAD!" BadTiming Boy yelled and pointed at the
    lifeless body of Cannon Fodder.
    "wha!?" Cheesecake Eater Lad jumped up from a restless sleep. He
    kicked a sleeping Parking Karma Kid. It was his time on the watch and he
    was
    fast asleep.
    PKKid jumped into action. "WHO GOES THERE!? WHAT IS THE PASSWORD!?"
    "Look Cannon Fodder has been MURDERED!?" Bandwagon Chick shrieked.
    She had entered the Gilligan hut to see the cause of all the chaos. "Look!" Cannon Fodder's body was exposed in a mangled body form that was just
    gruesome enough to pass the fanboy comic standards. RosterwReam's penknife stuck out of the chest of Cannon Fodder and a piece of paper was tacked
    through
    the knife.
    Cheesecake Eater approached the body and removed the pen/knife and
    note. Unscrolling the note and turning it up straight he read aloud.

    "I am the path leading to no return
    Secret of life nobody wants to learn
    I am the bird flying to distant shores
    If I lose my life then I save yours."

    "WAKE Kid Poetry and RosterwReam Immediately!" Opinionated Lad
    said determined.
    "What? I didn't do that!?" RosterwReam protested. He had been awake
    since the initial cry.
    "Me neither!?" Kid Poetry cried.
    "Someone in this camp is a MURDERER!" Bad Timing boy accused! "A
    traitor!"
    "Gee, now there's an ORIGINAL PLOT LINE!" Opinionated Lad protested.
    "Now calm down we don't know who did this. Maybe someone wanted to put
    him out of his misery? Can anyone provide a useful explanation? I promise
    if
    you confess we will be understanding" Cheesecake Eater Lad tried to reason with the group. No one spoke up.
    "Now c'mon someone had to do it." PK Kid said glancing around the room accusingly.
    "We can't just sit here and accuse each other!?" Bandwagon Chick said
    trying to ease the tension. "We must continue our climb, we will deal with this after we are rescued!"
    "I think you are right. I am going to hike to the top of the ridge
    today and set up an emergency bon fire. I will then setup a watch for
    passing
    ships or flight.thingies... Who wants to come with me?"
    "I will." RosterwReam spoke up.
    Opinionated Lad mumbled. PK Kid wanted to go but you could tell he was uncomfortable about going with a chief suspect. Cheesecake Eater cornered
    his
    friend by saying, "PK what about you?"
    "uh.. Yeah I will go." PK Kid said reluctantly.
    Opinionated Lad mumbled.
    "I will go too." Procrastination Boy said calmly.

    ** * *** * ** * *** * **

    "THE ISLAND IS GONE!?" Ultimate Ninja looked at a smoldering bubbling
    sea where the island of Glak used to be. There was no trace of any
    survivors.
    The flight.thingy compartment became deathly silent. Deja Dude,
    usually able to come up with something cheerful to say gazed on in
    disbelief.
    Only Renegade Programmer looked on with little emotion, he was munching on a piece of pizza he had salvaged from Theory Man.
    "You know theoretically i would say they have a very little chance of
    being alive." Theory Man said solemnly.
    "Well if your powers have been as successful as your ability to
    theoretically predict most anything, that should be good news." Occultism
    Kid
    added, trying to find hope in the loss.
    "THAT's it! We know that they aren't dead!" Deja Dude announced
    emphatically.
    "How?" Ultimate Ninja looked up from the controls of the
    Flight.thingy.
    "Well if they were. Cannon Fodder would reappear in the next issue of
    this comic! Remember. And he has not been seen since the original issue!
    And
    if Cannon Fodder has been alive all this time, that must mean the others
    are!"
    Deja Dude explained smiling.
    "You're right!" Ultimate Ninja said excitedly.
    "Well then where are they?" Occultism Kid scrambled for an answer.
    "They must have crashed on an island... OR something like that."
    "I know how to find them." Renegade Programmer said casually.
    "WELL TELL US MAN!" Ultimate Ninja clutched at the portly programmer.
    "Well, I guess I could be persuaded, if you buy me lunch..." Renegade Programmer smushed his lips together in expectation.

    *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

    Invisible Incendiary opened the loading docks to the LNH.HQ... IT's
    Here, finally! A large semi backed into the dock.
    "I don't see anyone here." one of the truckdrivers said.
    Invisible Incendiary picked up his note and waved it around and then
    reattached it to the main loading door.
    "HEY Joe!? Did you see that? Maybe that is a note of instructions!?"
    "I dunno, these hero types are pretty weird, Floating notes on the
    doors are the least of their powers." the other driver said casually
    getting
    out a dollie.
    The other man grabbed the note and read it aloud.
    "Please put all the goods in this room."
    "Hey! Look there is a map here too!" the man with the note said.
    "Well i would hope so!" Joe said.
    Invisible Incendiary opened the doors leading to Ultimate Ninja's
    ready room. Laughing to himself as he guided the two delivery men into the room.
    "Gee, I would have thought that they would have put this stuff in a storehouse!?"
    "Holy Cow! Look at that fish!" Joe said pointing to the Barracuda in
    the mounted aquarium. "You ever seen a fish like that, Herb?"
    "Nyeah, I caught one of them just the other day!"
    Invisible Incendiary sat on a case of Jolt Cola and laughed as Ultimate
    Ninja's ready room was being filled with every conceivable caffeinated
    drink on
    the market.

    **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** ****

    Somewhere in a future that will doubtfully occur...

    The energy of corruption coursed through the frame of wReamicus
    Maximus. "Look around you ACOLYTES!" The scene pans out and it is clearly visible that they are standing in the shadow of a ruined LNH.HQ. The
    bodies of
    dead heroes lay strewn about. Then one of the bodies stirs. It is the
    body of
    Contraption Man. In horror he reaches for a beacon that seems to be just
    out
    of reach. wReamicus Maximus notices him and turns on him, gloating...
    "LOOK!
    One lives!"
    "Evil Fiend WHO ARE YOU!? You come from the past!?" Contraption Man
    said trying to stay the evil doer hoping to get him to do a long solliloquy
    so that he could reach the object he sought.
    "I am your destruction! I am wReamicus Maximus, Chief Accolyte of the
    forces of DFANDOM... I represent the living continuity error! And I will
    now
    destroy the past as your future has been destroyed!"
    "I have been to the past and I cannot let that happen!" Contraption Man grabbed the beacon and pressed it.
    "I KNOW YOU! YOU are CONTRAPTION MAN! One of the LNH! YOU must DIE!"
    but wReamicus Maximus is too late... and Contraption Man is wisked away by a crosstime transmat beam. A blast of corruption follows into the transmat beam... Contraption Man's mind is warped in agony as he disappears...
    Only to
    reappear in the past ... (See System Corruptors/Ultimate Ninja #2 A
    Interlude
    to see where he comes out.)
    "Well, My dear Acolytes, this world has been trashed! Lets go Trash
    our previous time!" wReamicus waved his hand and the time portal reopened.
    The entire group of accolytes joined in a chorus of evil "Muwahahaha"s with
    the
    master of corruption.

    * * * * * * * * *

    [Scene: on the ridge in the past on the island of KLAG ]

    "Look! It's a ..." PK Kid stared over the edge and pointed to a white
    ball in the distant sky. "...cloud..."
    "I wonder what is taking the other LNHers so long to find us!?"
    CheeseCake Eater Lad wondered aloud.
    "Well when Lagneto attacked the ship, he assumed his blow would
    completely destroy us and the vessel. He only managed to get the vessel,
    but
    thanks to ParkingKarma Kid's incredible parking luck, we managed to survive, only losing the ship." RosterwReam explained arduously.
    "Well that was a great exposition summary, but you still haven't
    managed to explain why we cannot seem to be found." PK Kid said
    impatiently.
    "Well it should be obvious that all the tracking devices and beepers we
    had with us were disentegrated in the attack!" RosterwReam said disgustedly
    at
    PK Kid's ignorance.
    "OBVIOUSLY!" PK Kid said frustratedly throwing his hands in the air.
    "Guys! Look! There is smoke on that part of the island!" Cheesecake
    Eater Lad said in alarm.
    "I wonder if they are good or bad people." RosterwReam said.
    "Or things, Lions, tigers, and bears..." PK Kid said straining to get
    a better look.
    "We had better warn the others!" Cheesecake Eater Lad said
    responsibly.
    "Hey! Look over here!" Procrastination Boy, who was just getting to
    the trail head, knocked a rock loose and the ground began to tremble. A
    door
    sized hole in the face of the cliff, the four stood upon, opened wide.
    There
    was a sigh of air rushing in as the passage opened, and the upon inspection, there was a discernable path leading downward into darkness.
    "WOW!" RosterwReam grabbed a twig and immediately had fashioned a
    torch, while Cheesecake Eater Lad and PK Kid looked on cautiously.
    "You know we really should get to the others before we start out on
    this adventure." CheeseCake Eater said even more reluctantly. Adventure welled up in the hearts of the three heros and the curiosity was nearly incontainable.
    "Well what if we just looked in a little bit. We can always come back
    out..." RosterwReam said stepping into the passage entrance. The light of the torch illuminated RwR's steps a few feet in front of him and he slowly proceeded.
    PK Kid had already begun to fashion himself a torch from some of the
    kindling that CheeseCake Eater and the others had collected for a signal
    fire.
    CheeseCake Eater as curious as the others succumbed to the urge and soon he
    and
    PK Kid were spellunking the deep dark completely negligent of the others
    they
    had left behind.
    Procrastination Boy eventually followed too.

    ** *** ** *** **

    [Scene down at the camp on the island of KLAG]

    Bad Timing Boy, Kid Poetry and Opinionated Lad are each trying to
    support a very tautery BandWagon Chick who is attempting to get a coconut
    from
    a high palm. TimeWaster Lad is amusing himself in the background with a
    palm
    frond.
    "Hey BandWagon Chick, tell me about your love for Parking Karma Kid!?"
    Bad Timing Boy blurted out smiling. There was no more keeping it in. "WHAOOAHG!" Bandwagon Chick warbled as she attempted not to fall from
    the embarrassing question, but the structure of bodies is hardly engineering sound and topples onto the sand. BandWagon Chick grumbles as she wipes the sand off herself and her ever shrinking costume.
    "What did you have to go and do that for!" Kid Poetry said annoyed.
    "Now we will never know the charms of the fair maiden's heart!"
    "OH GREAT! I am stuck here with a bunch of gossipping twerps! If
    Bandwagon Chick doesn't wish to talk, well then, she ..." Opinionated Lad
    was
    the worst when it came to gossip, and he knew he would want to know. "had better tell us soon! " He said grinning.
    "Hey Guys! Back Off! I think PK Kid is a nice friend, and nothing
    more!" Bandwagon Chick said instinctively.
    The LNHers were all disappointed, even TimeWaster Lad. An audible
    ahhhh could be heard as their hopes in hearing details of a torid lusty
    love
    affair were deflated. Then to keep things interesting BandWagon Chick
    added,
    "Besides! Why should I pair myself up with one handsome hero, when I can
    have
    a whole LEGION of them!" She winked at the guys who instantly came to
    life.
    BandWagon Chick sauntered away, into the bushes.
    "Woman! No one knows the mystery!" Kid Poetry sighed in admiration.
    "You got that right!" Opinionated Lad said smiling.
    In fact all the LNHers left in camp were pretty pleased. However that
    was about to change. From the bushes near TimeWaster Lad is seen two arms reaching out. They grab the unsuspecting hero and drag him out of site.

    "Did you hear something?" Bad Timing Boy spoke up. "Where is
    TimeWaster?"
    "I don't know and I don't care." Opinionate Lad said, then looking up
    at the coconut tree said. "You know those coconuts look ripe enough, in my opinion they should just FALL off the tree."
    And as if on cue they did.
    BadTiming Boy is the next to disappear.
    "Where did BadTiming Boy Go? He was here just a second ago?!"
    Opinionated Lad said vehemently. "He is never here to appreciate my
    powers!"
    "You know with all of us disappearing it reminds me of a great poem.
    And then there were none!"
    Opinionated Lad turned toward the voice of Kid Poetry, but by now he
    too is gone.
    "Ok guys come out! This is no longer funny!" and on cue a horde of
    angry natives with human skulls on the end of their spears have the
    opionated
    one surrounded. In the background is visible a Kid Poetry, Bad Timing Boy
    and
    Time Waster Lad all gagged and tied to poles!
    "Cripes... you can go hide again if you ... wahgnaght!" Opinionated
    Lad joins the bound and gagged!

    * ** *** ** *

    "So now that you have had your fill of food, would you mind filling US
    in on your idea." Ultimate Ninja said impatiently.
    "Well I just thought, that we being in the net.universe it would be
    quite easy to find a given bit pattern given enough information it won't be
    too
    hard to create a search program that finds the lost heroes rather quickly." Renegade Programmer said linking his portable keyboard into the onboard computer of the Flight.thingy. "I should have this thing going in just a sec..." Renegade Programmer said confidently.
    "How will you know how to search for them?" Occultism Kid said gazing
    blankly into the screen of scrolling text.
    "Oh well we will have to train on some unique features that the
    characters have." Renegade Programmer said not even looking up or slowing
    to
    answer the question. The others looked on despondent. They had no idea
    how to
    help, and the last thing they wanted to do is get in the way of the guy that was nearly impossible to get him do what you wanted!
    "...and now add the jiffy sort and then add a few cofangulation
    factors..." Renegade Programmer mumbled as he typed, and then addressing
    the
    group. "You know one way you could help is find some unique searching
    sequence
    among the names of your lost heroes while I type this in. I will just hard code the search..."
    "Well they all have things that are fairly common on the net... Kid
    Poetry, BandWagon Chick, Procrastination Boy, TimeWaster Lad, Opinionated
    Lad,
    most of these are well known characterwize, and not all that unique."
    Ultimate
    Ninja murmurred.
    "Well there isn't much discussion about Parking Karma or Cheesecake
    Eaters!" Deja Dude added.
    "And I don't know about you, but I RosterwReam is the most unique thing around." Occultism Kid said, thinking of his adventures with him.
    "... OK so it is RosterwReam, then... I will hard code it and try it out..." Renegade Programmer said. "... Let's give this thing a try...
    cc try.c , and link and "
    All of a sudden the flight.thingy's engines roared and the vehicle
    flung itself back into the sky. "IS IT WORKING!?" Ultimate Ninja yelled
    above
    the roar of the engines.
    "Yeah, I think so... ONly one way to know for sure!" Renegade
    Programmer said examining the minimal visual out put he had provided as indicators of program functions. "That will be if we find them! The flight.thingy should bring us directly to the whereabouts of RosterwReam."

    * * * * * * * *

    "THERE IT IS! NETTER LIBERATION FRONT! THE ISLAND OF KLAG!" Lagneto announced to his crew as they all flew toward the island. Lagneto had
    caused
    the air to lag beneath them and so those that couldn't fly were propelled
    by to
    force of the antilag-backlash he had caused in the airflow.
    "Look SMOKE!" Onomato-Puweeha Person yelled.
    "Oh how lovely!" cried Ice Hot.
    "Looks like we will start our search there, eh boss?" Pylon said
    grinning.
    "NEVER TELL ME WHAT WE DO OR DON'T DO!" Lagneto said indignantly. "I
    SAY WE SEARCH THE SMOKE!"
    "Good Choice Lag!" Girl Next Door said smiling innocently.
    Mistake molded his face into a contorted mocking face and oodled Pylon
    just to get on his case. Pylon infuriated yelled, "BOSS! Mistake is making face at me!"
    "I was not!" Mistake says checking to see if Lagneto even looks. He
    doesn't. So he made another face.
    "BOOOOSSSS!?"
    "You kids be quiet or I will drop you both here!" Lagneto said
    frustratedly... "Stupid fools! I can't take them anywhere!"

    *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

    "Stupid Men! I should say BOYS! Always trying to check out the most
    buxom of the hero babes!" Bandwagon Chick mumbled to herself. "For once I would love a man that was more than just a bunch of hormones... Someone who really like to cuddle. And be warm and nice, and ...it wouldn't hurt if he were cute... Well who am I fooling!? I am in a comic world, there is no
    such thing..."
    Just then Bandwagon Chick's conversation is interrupted by rustling in
    the bushes. It is just about enough. Bandwagon Chick had obliged the
    fellows
    with a little flirt, but to follow her into the woods, and evesdrop! well
    that
    was the final straw!
    "All Right Come out of the bushes!" Bandwagon Chick commanded, picking
    up a big stick. "Get out here now."
    "Please don't hurt me, I only curious..." A strange voice said as he
    stepped from the bushes. "Please, I mean no harm to you."
    A young man well built wearing only a loin cloth walked out of the
    bushes. His arms were open, He was somewhat fuzzy and had blond hair. His feature were hard to describe, but all that BandWagon Chick could think of
    was
    of how cute he was. He just looked cute! How could this be!? Was it his special power? Bandwagon chick was not frightened and asked. "Who are
    you?"
    "I don't know." the man replied. "But the natives call me, Hamster
    Man."
    "Hamster Man!? Why?" Bandwagon Chick said smiling.
    "I think it because of the day of big crash. My dear ones are left me
    and not wake up, so I am small and tiny and need love. I am found by a
    kindly
    hamster and he give me magic and strength and teach me ways of wild. I have the powers of my dear one the hamsters."
    "Are you saying you were raised by hamsters?" BandWagon Chick said incredulously.
    "Yes, and I can do hamster things!"
    "Like what?"
    "Run very fast...Climb stuff...Look cute...Chew things...Look cute
    Store food in my cheeks... and did I mention ...look cute..."
    "Is that it?" Bandwagon Chick said with an eyebrow raised.
    "Well, I be warm and cuddly!?" Hamster Man said with a smile.
    BandWagon Chick blushed.
    "Can you help us get out?"
    "us?"
    "Yeah me and my friends!"
    "Oh you mean the one with the bad timed mouth, and the one with the big
    mouth and the one that talks in poems and the one who..."
    "Yeah yeah, that's them..."
    "Oh well they cannot be helped, they are gonna be eaten."
    "WHAT!?!" BandWagon Chick gasped.
    "They were captured by Jungle Queen and her fearsome cannibal
    warriors!!!"
    "Well we have got to do something to rescue them!" BandWagon Chick said determined.
    "I will help you, too!" Hamster Man said excitedly.
    BandWagon Chick gave a sigh and thought, you know, he really is cute.

    *** ***
    ** ********* **
    * *********************** *
    ** ********* **
    *** ***

    "MacLaughlin Man, You're on in two minutes!" Net.Star yelled into the
    entry way where a well dressed politician, aged and onery.
    "Yeah, Yeah I will be on in just a second!" MacLaughlin Man yelled.
    "I need more dirt on the LNH! Lately my ratings have skyrocketed since
    I started libelling the LNH and I need more dirt!" he muttered to himself.
    Just then from the shadows is raised a gun and the figure of a man aiming at the back side of MacLaughlin Man is clearly viewed.
    "SHRRRACK!" The gun blows off, the figure of MacLaughlin Man explodes
    in blood, the body falls down dead and mangled.The studio bursts with
    commotion and in the chaos is heard above the rest, even if it is in
    whisper...

    "Net.Justice is served!"

    The assasin is gone.
    "OH MY GOODNESS! OH MY GOODNESS!" Cried Net.Star.
    "What!?" MacLaughlin Man enters from a closet close by.
    "You are ALIVE!?" Dramatizer cried dramatically!
    "OF course I am! But I am going to have to get myself another stunt
    double!" MacLaughlin Man said cynically as he viewed the parts of his unfortunate double strewn across the dressing room.
    "Aren't you the least bit scared!?" Romantic Innuendo asked.
    "A bit! But at least NOW I have a story! And I know just WHO to
    blame for this fiasco!" MacLaughlin Man said sinisterly.

    *** ***
    ** ********* **
    * *********************** *
    ** ********* **
    *** ***

    "Uhhh... Guys, I am not that palatable!" Opinionate Lad cried as
    his gag was replaced with a turnip.
    "Please don't eat me!" Bad Timing Boy cried in panic.
    "You know this reminds me of a musical!" Kid Poetry exclaimed. "The
    History of the world My sweet, is who get's eaten and who gets to Eat!"
    "You know if they are going to tie us up the least they could do is let
    us have some terminal or something so we could MUD!" TimeWaster Lad
    protested
    indignantly.
    The native cannibals danced wildly around a large fire. The jungle
    beating down in a natural rhythm felt like a great place to dance.
    "What are they waiting for!? Why don't they just stew us and get it
    over with!?" Bad Timing Boy cried out in panic.
    Suddenly the drums went silent, and all eyes turned to the central hut.
    The entire hut shuddered as the lead witch in the camp made her way out of
    the
    ceremonial abode adorned in a HUGE costume and mask that dwarfed her in
    size.
    "OOOOOOGGABOOOGAHBOAOOSGHA!" The Jungle Queen cried out in
    magookian garble.
    "Any more wishes, Alladin?" Kid Poetry muttered to Bad Timing Boy who
    was biting his lip.
    It looked pretty hopeless as the heroes stood on the edge of the fire
    pit, preparing for their barbecque. "Well it's been nice knowing you." Time Waster Lad said to Bad Timing Boy.

    All of a sudden a comotion from the sky caused the natives to abandon
    their apetites. "UBAKA! UBAKA DOO MAHKAHKA NIDDIYONK!" They cried
    pointing!
    "Oh For JOY! We are saved!" Bad Timing Boy said with relief.
    "OH I WOULDN'T SAY THAT!" Lagneto said Smiling! "I would say you are
    about to make a jump from out of their frying pan and into our FIRE!"
    "Ice Hot will see to that!"

    ** *** **** *** **

    "There Look!?" RosterwReam said excitedly. "THE RUNG OF REVAMP! I
    can't believe we found it!"
    Cheesecake Eater Lad cautiously approached the holy relic of comics.
    "I don't like this, it has been too easy!"
    "I say we leave it and get out of here!" PK Kid said. Procrastination
    Boy nodded.
    "And let this great chance to make history skip us by!? Haven't you
    noticed!? No one has come to rescue us because we are NOBODIES! We haven't got any great powers!! The rung of Revamp can change all that!"
    "Hey! RosterwReam I know taking care of the roster is a drag, but
    you have had some good adventures! " Cheesecake Eater Lad reasoned. "Now let's get out of here before Lagneto catches us!"
    "NO! I refuse to let this happen?! If we are revamped we are certain
    to get powers that can stop even LAGNETO!" RosterwReam shouted wildly!
    "But we have the power to stop him! Don't you see!? Ultimate Ninja
    sent us after him because he thought we could do it!" Cheesecake Eater Lad said trying to hold out the intoxicating thoughts of having an energy blast instead of a cheesecake squirter.
    "or was he trying to get rid of us." Procrastination Boy said
    unsuredly.
    "Don't say that!" CheeseCake Eater lad pled. "Don't grab the rung..."
    It was too late. RosterwReam grabbed ahold of the rung and immediately
    the walls shook... A Deep voice resounded about the cavern walls and
    pierced
    each of them to their hearts. RosterwReam was encased in a shower of crystaline light and levitated, drawn up in a corona of raw energy of the
    rung.
    "CHOOSE YOUR POWERS ACCORDING TO YOUR PERSON"
    "YOUR DESIRE"
    "YOUR WILL" The voice boomed.
    "BECOME A HERO ANEW" at the finish of the words RosterwReam is
    enveloped in a fountain of light. The power that was there is immediately sucked back into the rung, and RosterwReam is once again standing on the pedestal that held the rung. The rung is inert in his hands, and
    RosterwReam
    speaks.
    "What has happened?" wReamhack murmured?
    "You look the same." CheeseCake Eater Lad said scrutinizing his
    person...
    "Except for your change in costume... There are no more mini roster
    listings on your person!" Parking Karma Kid said amazed.
    Procrastination Boy just stood amazed, pondering all the neat things he
    would do with his new powers.
    "Well can you fly?" CheeseCake Eater Lad asked.
    "Well no, my powers haven't really changed all that much..." the old RosterwReam said smiling. "But I think this will be for the better."
    "Well who are you now?" Parking Karma Kid said.
    "I am wReamhack! My powers are computer related! I am a computer
    hacker extraordinaire!"
    "Oh GOOD CHOICE OF Powers!" PK Kid said sarcastically. "Here we are
    stranded on an island that is inhabited by who knows what and the closest computer is thousands of miles away and you happen to wish for change to be
    a
    HACKER!?"
    "Well I will be happier this way!" wReamhack protested.
    "It is sorta, ironic. Irony Man would have loved you!" CheeseCake
    Eater Lad said smiling. "But at least you can hold the rung! Now lets get
    out
    of here and find the others." CheeseCake Eater Lad lit another torch (he
    had
    thought ahead to take extra materials) and headed out of the cavern. The others followed.
    "I still think you should have wished for some powers like super
    strength or something!" PK Kid said disappointedly.
    "It doesn't work that way!" wReamhack tried to explain. The arguing
    echoed through the cave.
    In the dark Procrastination Boy lagged behind. Hey Guys, I wanna try
    that rung thing! I want new powers, He thought. I will tell them later I guess...

    * * * * * * * * * *
    * * * * * * * * * *

    "KAPUTZ!" Renegade Programmer's program fumbled and sputtered. The Flight.Thingy spun out of control.
    "What has happened?" Ultimate Ninja grabbed the controls and dragged on
    them.
    "It isn't possible! How?" Renegade Programmer agonized. "My program
    was flawless! I checked it!"
    "Well it is happening!" Occultism Kid observed astutely.
    "What does it all mean?!" Deja Dude said trying to gain hold of
    something stable in the whirling craft...
    "IT means according to my calculations we are gonna crash into that
    ISLAND!" Theory Man hypothesized frantically.
    Just then Ultimate Ninja managed to gain control of the flight.thingy.
    "I HAD A lock on HIM! He was on the island!?" Renegade Programmer hit
    the keys to his keyboard but it didn't help.
    "What has happened!?" Ultimate Ninja demanded.
    "RosterwReam is no longer on the island! Or for that matter ANYWHERE
    in the net.universe!"
    "You mean he's..." Occultism Kid said reluctantly. "... dead ..."
    "Worse. He's gone completely! Ceased to exist!" Renegade Programmer
    said anxiously...
    Just then MTMan came accross the intercom. "Uh guys, guess who just
    showed up here?"
    "Who?" Deja Dude said sullenly.
    "CANNON FODDER!" MTMan said surprised.
    All those present in the flight.thingy had an lump in their throats...
    Ultimate Ninja looked over the tiny island through tears that could not be
    seen
    by his teammates. A tuft of smoke billowed from the center of the island at the base of a high cliff front.
    "GUYS! Smoke! We're GOING IN!" Ultimate Ninja said with anger in his
    voice.

    **** **** **** **** ****

    Obviously NOT the END! but we're getting there!


    NEXT ISSUE:

    Last issue I promised: (and other stuff that I delivered.) Well

    I will promise it next time instead... PROMISE! (...maybe...) ***************************************************************************** ** Kid Kirby gets more action.
    ** wReamed Acton Lord is RESURRECTED! *****************************************************************************

    along with...

    ** The real powers of wReamhack
    ** A REALLY BIG BATTLE -- (Uh Jef, wanna help me write the NLF?)
    ** MacLaughlin Man and wReamicus scheme some schemes...
    ** Hamster Man and BandWagon Chick get into the action...
    ** The Native Cannibals finally get something to EAT!
    ** Onomato-Puweeha Person is NO MORE!
    ** Cannon Fodder's Murderer is Revealed!
    ** Another assasination by the scourge of Net.Justice!
    ** Invisible Incendiary gets a spot of revenge...

    ** And as always: More fun and Mayhem !!!


    wReam...

    P.S. Now if only I could get all my homework done! :)

    P.P.S. Everyone Welcome our newest LNHer! Hamster Man

    (From Sweden!!) (Daniel Falk -- d91-fad@tekn.hj.se)




    ==========

    Next Week: Some more JUNGLE CHEESECAKE!!!!!

    ==========

    Arthur "Same Classic Channel. But Same Time? Probably not." Spitzer

    --00000000000057b1d30643bc5221
    Content-Type: text/html; charset="UTF-8"
    Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

    <div dir=3D"ltr">And we&#39;re back in the past and can check the eyrie arc= hive <br>once again.<br><br><br>Here&#39;s where you can find this and more=
    Ultimate Ninja<br>Action!:<br><br><a href=3D"https://archives.eyrie.org/ra= cc/lnh/Series/Ultimate.Ninja/">https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Series/U= ltimate.Ninja/</a><br><br><br>And some more Raymond &quot;wReam&quot; Bingh=
    am doing Ultimate<br>Ninja #8!<br><br><br>Can it be -- is Cannon Fodder -- = DEAD?!!=C2=A0 But Who Did It?!!<br>And will Bandwagon Chick ever find that = guy that isn&#39;t<br>full of hormones that just wants to cuddle -- and per= haps<br>likes to run around in a big hamster wheel while stuffing<br>his ch= eeks full of sunflower seeds?!!!!<br><br>Find out in...<br><br><br><br>=C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 _ <br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0Classic <br>=C2=A0=
    =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=
    =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| | =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ = =C2=A0 =C2=A0_ =C2=A0 =C2=A0____ =C2=A0 =C2=A0___<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0| |__ =C2=A0 | [] | =C2=A0| [] | =C2=A0| | =C2=
    =A0| [] | =C2=A0| _ \ =C2=A0<br><br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0|____| =C2=A0 \__] =C2=A0 =C2=A0\__ | =C2=A0|_| =C2=A0 \__/ =C2=
    =A0 |_|\_\<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0||<br>=C2=A0 =C2= =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 |_| =C2=A0OF NET.HEROES<br><br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ADVENTURES #395<br><br><br><br>=C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0Jungle Cheesecake Part Five<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=
    =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D<br><br><br><br><br> =
    =C2=A0 =C2=A0(Ultimate Ninja #8 (LNH (C)opyright 1993) <br><br><br>OnomatoP= uweeha Person gasped as she viewed the grandeur of the secret mountain<br>b= ase that Lagneto kept.=C2=A0 It was in the heart of the antarctic land heat=
    ed by<br>sun workstation servers (those things emit lots of heat!) where di= nosaurs still<br>roamed the earth... I was called the Savage Place!=C2=A0 T=
    he mountain wall opened to<br>reveal the innards of a very technobabbly adv= anced base.=C2=A0 Lagneto was greeted<br>with a sinister smile by Pylon and=
    Girl Next Door. =C2=A0<br> &quot;Who&#39;s the new recruit?!&quot; =C2=A0G=
    irl Next Door said looking over the<br>nondescript O-PP. =C2=A0<br> &quot;T=
    hat is none of your concern!=C2=A0 Soon she will be different!=C2=A0 I must= <br>find where the Jungle of KLAG is! You assemble the others, I want them = close if<br>there is need for a strike.&quot; =C2=A0Lagneto commanded and P= ylon and Girl Next Door<br>hastily left to assemble the others. =C2=A0&quot= ;Now my dear, come with me.&quot;<br> Through a maze of twisted metalic pas= sages and convoluted doorways they<br>traveled until OnomatoPuweeha Person&= #39;s head was spinning.=C2=A0 She gave up trying<br>to find a way out, abo=
    ut the time the two entered a very large hall with a<br>hologram projector =
    in the center of the open room. =C2=A0<br> &quot;Scan access names to an is=
    land of KLAG and display on main view<br>hologram!&quot; =C2=A0Lagneto said=
    abruptly into the empty room.=C2=A0 The computers buzzed<br>with excitemen=
    t on command and soon an image began to form in the center of the<br>room.= =C2=A0 The image was a satellite topographical map. =C2=A0<br> As the image=
    materialized it became more and more obvious that Lagneto<br>knew where it=
    was.=C2=A0 A worried look came across his face and then like then in<br>hy= sterical laughter he blurted out. =C2=A0 &quot;Hahahahaha!=C2=A0 Do you kno=
    w where this<br>is!?=C2=A0 This is the island that I crashed those dogooder=
    s from the LNH!&quot;<br> &quot;BUT They are dead aren&#39;t they!?&quot; =
    =C2=A0Onomato-Puweeha Person said<br>inquisitively.<br> &quot;You my dead h= ave not been doing this as long as I have, trust me, they<br>are alive.&quo=
    t; =C2=A0Lagneto brooded. =C2=A0&quot;And if they aren&#39;t their friends = will no doubt<br>be searching for them.&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;What will we=
    do?!&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;Assemble the troops!=C2=A0 We will strike anyt= hing that moves!&quot; =C2=A0Lagneto<br>said madly.=C2=A0 Then he mused in =
    a tone of irony. =C2=A0&quot;I wonder if there were<br>survivors... Could t= hey even survive the cannibal nations living on the<br>island? Hmmmm...&quo=
    t; =C2=A0<br><br> * * * * * * * * *<br><br> &quot;GAAAAHHH!!!&quot; =C2=A0B=
    ad Timing boy was the first to wake in the morning. =C2=A0<br> &quot;HE... = He... He&#39;s DEAD!&quot; =C2=A0BadTiming Boy yelled and pointed at the<br= >lifeless body of Cannon Fodder. =C2=A0<br> &quot;wha!?&quot; =C2=A0Cheesec=
    ake Eater Lad jumped up from a restless sleep.=C2=A0 He<br>kicked a sleepin=
    g Parking Karma Kid.=C2=A0 It was his time on the watch and he was<br>fast = asleep. =C2=A0<br> PKKid jumped into action. =C2=A0&quot;WHO GOES THERE!?= =C2=A0 WHAT IS THE PASSWORD!?&quot;<br> &quot;Look Cannon Fodder has been M= URDERED!?&quot; =C2=A0Bandwagon Chick shrieked.<br>She had entered the Gill= igan hut to see the cause of all the chaos. =C2=A0&quot;Look!&quot;<br> Can= non Fodder&#39;s body was exposed in a mangled body form that was just<br>g= ruesome enough to pass the fanboy comic standards.=C2=A0 RosterwReam&#39;s = penknife<br>stuck out of the chest of Cannon Fodder and a piece of paper wa=
    s tacked through<br>the knife.<br> Cheesecake Eater approached the body and=
    removed the pen/knife and<br>note.=C2=A0 Unscrolling the note and turning =
    it up straight he read aloud. <br><br> &quot;I am the path leading to no re= turn<br> Secret of life nobody wants to learn<br> I am the bird flying to d=
    istant shores<br> If I lose my life then I save yours.&quot;<br><br>=C2=A0 =
    =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 &quot;WAKE Kid Poetry and RosterwReam Immediately!&quo=
    t; =C2=A0Opinionated Lad<br>said determined. <br> &quot;What?=C2=A0 I didn&=
    #39;t do that!?&quot; =C2=A0RosterwReam protested.=C2=A0 He had been awake<= br>since the initial cry. =C2=A0<br> &quot;Me neither!?&quot; =C2=A0Kid Poe= try cried. =C2=A0<br> &quot;Someone in this camp is a MURDERER!&quot; =C2= =A0Bad Timing boy accused! =C2=A0&quot;A<br>traitor!&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot= ;Gee, now there&#39;s an ORIGINAL PLOT LINE!&quot; =C2=A0Opinionated Lad pr= otested.<br> &quot;Now calm down we don&#39;t know who did this.=C2=A0 Mayb= e someone wanted to put<br>him out of his misery?=C2=A0 Can anyone provide =
    a useful explanation?=C2=A0 I promise if<br>you confess we will be understa= nding&quot; =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad tried to reason<br>with the group.= =C2=A0 No one spoke up.<br> &quot;Now c&#39;mon someone had to do it.&quot;=
    =C2=A0PK Kid said glancing around the room<br>accusingly. =C2=A0<br> &quot= ;We can&#39;t just sit here and accuse each other!?&quot; =C2=A0Bandwagon C= hick said<br>trying to ease the tension. =C2=A0&quot;We must continue our c= limb, we will deal with<br>this after we are rescued!&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quo= t;I think you are right.=C2=A0 I am going to hike to the top of the ridge<b= r>today and set up an emergency bon fire.=C2=A0 I will then setup a watch f=
    or passing<br>ships or flight.thingies...=C2=A0 Who wants to come with me?&= quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;I will.&quot; =C2=A0RosterwReam spoke up.<br> Opinio=
    nated Lad mumbled.=C2=A0 PK Kid wanted to go but you could tell he was<br>u= ncomfortable about going with a chief suspect.=C2=A0 Cheesecake Eater corne= red his<br>friend by saying, &quot;PK what about you?&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quo= t;uh.. Yeah I will go.&quot; =C2=A0 PK Kid said reluctantly.<br> Opinionate=
    d Lad mumbled. =C2=A0<br> &quot;I will go too.&quot; =C2=A0Procrastination =
    Boy said calmly.<br><br> ** * *** * ** * *** * **<br><br> &quot;THE ISLAND =
    IS GONE!?&quot; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja looked at a smoldering bubbling<br>sea=
    where the island of Glak used to be.=C2=A0 There was no trace of any survi= vors.<br> The flight.thingy compartment became deathly silent. =C2=A0 Deja =
    Dude,<br>usually able to come up with something cheerful to say gazed on in=
    disbelief. =C2=A0<br>Only Renegade Programmer looked on with little emotio=
    n, he was munching on a<br>piece of pizza he had salvaged from Theory Man. = =C2=A0<br> &quot;You know theoretically i would say they have a very little=
    chance of<br>being alive.&quot; =C2=A0Theory Man said solemnly.<br> &quot;= Well if your powers have been as successful as your ability to<br>theoretic= ally predict most anything, that should be good news.&quot; =C2=A0Occultism=
    Kid<br>added, trying to find hope in the loss. =C2=A0<br> &quot;THAT&#39;s=
    it!=C2=A0 We know that they aren&#39;t dead!&quot; =C2=A0Deja Dude announc= ed<br>emphatically. =C2=A0<br> &quot;How?&quot; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja looked=
    up from the controls of the<br>Flight.thingy.<br> &quot;Well if they were.=
    =C2=A0 Cannon Fodder would reappear in the next issue of<br>this comic!=C2=
    =A0 Remember.=C2=A0 And he has not been seen since the original issue!=C2=
    =A0 And<br>if Cannon Fodder has been alive all this time, that must mean th=
    e others are!&quot;<br>Deja Dude explained smiling.<br> &quot;You&#39;re ri= ght!&quot; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja said excitedly.<br> &quot;Well then where a=
    re they?&quot; =C2=A0Occultism Kid scrambled for an answer.<br> &quot;They = must have crashed on an island... OR something like that.&quot;<br> &quot;I=
    know how to find them.&quot; =C2=A0Renegade Programmer said casually. =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0<br> &quot;WELL TELL US MAN!&quot; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja clutched = at the portly programmer.<br> &quot;Well, I guess I could be persuaded, if = you buy me lunch...&quot; =C2=A0Renegade<br>Programmer smushed his lips tog= ether in expectation.<br><br>*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***<br><br=
    Invisible Incendiary opened the loading docks to the LNH.HQ...=C2=A0 IT&#=
    39;s<br>Here, finally!=C2=A0 A large semi backed into the dock. =C2=A0<br> =
    &quot;I don&#39;t see anyone here.&quot; =C2=A0one of the truckdrivers said=
    . =C2=A0<br> Invisible Incendiary picked up his note and waved it around an= d then<br>reattached it to the main loading door.<br> &quot;HEY Joe!?=C2=A0=
    Did you see that?=C2=A0 Maybe that is a note of instructions!?&quot;<br> &=
    quot;I dunno, these hero types are pretty weird, Floating notes on the<br>d= oors are the least of their powers.&quot; =C2=A0the other driver said casua= lly getting<br>out a dollie.<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 The other man grabbed the not= e and read it aloud.<br> &quot;Please put all the goods in this room.&quot;=
    <br> &quot;Hey!=C2=A0 Look there is a map here too!&quot; =C2=A0the man wit=
    h the note said.<br> &quot;Well i would hope so!&quot; =C2=A0Joe said.<br> =
    Invisible Incendiary opened the doors leading to Ultimate Ninja&#39;s <br>r= eady room.=C2=A0 Laughing to himself as he guided the two delivery men into=
    the <br>room.<br> &quot;Gee, I would have thought that they would have put=
    this stuff in a<br>storehouse!?&quot;<br> &quot;Holy Cow!=C2=A0 Look at th=
    at fish!&quot; =C2=A0Joe said pointing to the Barracuda in<br>the mounted a= quarium. =C2=A0&quot;You ever seen a fish like that, Herb?&quot;<br> &quot;= Nyeah, I caught one of them just the other day!&quot;<br> Invisible Incendi=
    ary sat on a case of Jolt Cola and laughed as Ultimate<br>Ninja&#39;s ready=
    room was being filled with every conceivable caffeinated drink on<br>the m= arket. =C2=A0<br><br>**** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** ****<br><=
    Somewhere in a future that will doubtfully occur...<br><br> The energy o=
    f corruption coursed through the frame of wReamicus<br>Maximus. =C2=A0 &quo= t;Look around you ACOLYTES!&quot; =C2=A0The scene pans out and it is clearl= y<br>visible that they are standing in the shadow of a ruined LNH.HQ.=C2=A0=
    The bodies of<br>dead heroes lay strewn about.=C2=A0 Then one of the bodie=
    s stirs.=C2=A0 It is the body of<br>Contraption Man.=C2=A0 In horror he rea= ches for a beacon that seems to be just out<br>of reach. =C2=A0wReamicus Ma= ximus notices him and turns on him, gloating... &quot;LOOK!<br>One lives!&q= uot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;Evil Fiend WHO ARE YOU!?=C2=A0 You come from the past= !?&quot; =C2=A0Contraption Man<br>said trying to stay the evil doer hoping =
    to get him to do a long solliloquy <br>so that he could reach the object he=
    sought.<br> &quot;I am your destruction!=C2=A0 I am wReamicus Maximus, Chi= ef Accolyte of the<br>forces of DFANDOM... I represent the living continuit=
    y error!=C2=A0 And I will now<br>destroy the past as your future has been d= estroyed!&quot;<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 &quot;I have been to the pas=
    t and I cannot let that happen!&quot; =C2=A0Contraption<br>Man grabbed the = beacon and pressed it.<br> &quot;I KNOW YOU!=C2=A0 YOU are CONTRAPTION MAN!=
    =C2=A0 One of the LNH!=C2=A0 YOU must DIE!&quot;<br>but wReamicus Maximus i=
    s too late... and Contraption Man is wisked away by a<br>crosstime transmat=
    beam.=C2=A0 A blast of corruption follows into the transmat<br>beam...=C2=
    =A0 Contraption Man&#39;s mind is warped in agony as he disappears...=C2=A0=
    Only to<br>reappear in the past ... =C2=A0(See System Corruptors/Ultimate = Ninja #2 A Interlude<br>to see where he comes out.)<br> &quot;Well, My dear=
    Acolytes, this world has been trashed!=C2=A0 Lets go Trash<br>our previous=
    time!&quot; =C2=A0wReamicus waved his hand and the time portal reopened.<b= r>The entire group of accolytes joined in a chorus of evil &quot;Muwahahaha= &quot;s with the<br>master of corruption.<br><br> * * * * * * * * *<br> <br=
    [Scene: on the ridge in the past on the island of KLAG ]<br><br> &quot;Lo=
    ok!=C2=A0 It&#39;s a ...&quot; PK Kid stared over the edge and pointed to a=
    white<br>ball in the distant sky. =C2=A0&quot;...cloud...&quot; =C2=A0<br>=
    &quot;I wonder what is taking the other LNHers so long to find us!?&quot; =
    <br>CheeseCake Eater Lad wondered aloud.<br> &quot;Well when Lagneto attack= ed the ship, he assumed his blow would<br>completely destroy us and the ves= sel.=C2=A0 He only managed to get the vessel, but<br>thanks to ParkingKarma=
    Kid&#39;s incredible parking luck, we managed to survive,<br>only losing t=
    he ship.&quot; =C2=A0RosterwReam explained arduously.<br> &quot;Well that w=
    as a great exposition summary, but you still haven&#39;t<br>managed to expl= ain why we cannot seem to be found.&quot; =C2=A0PK Kid said impatiently.<br=
    &quot;Well it should be obvious that all the tracking devices and beepers=
    we<br>had with us were disentegrated in the attack!&quot; RosterwReam said=
    disgustedly at<br>PK Kid&#39;s ignorance.<br> &quot;OBVIOUSLY!&quot; =C2= =A0PK Kid said frustratedly throwing his hands in the air.<br> &quot;Guys! = Look!=C2=A0 There is smoke on that part of the island!&quot; =C2=A0Cheeseca= ke<br>Eater Lad said in alarm. =C2=A0<br> &quot;I wonder if they are good o=
    r bad people.&quot; =C2=A0RosterwReam said.<br> &quot;Or things, Lions, tig= ers, and bears...&quot; =C2=A0PK Kid said straining to get<br>a better look= .<br> &quot;We had better warn the others!&quot; =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad=
    said<br>responsibly.<br> &quot;Hey!=C2=A0 Look over here!&quot; =C2=A0Proc=
    rastination Boy, who was just getting to<br>the trail head, knocked a rock = loose and the ground began to tremble.=C2=A0 A door<br>sized hole in the fa=
    ce of the cliff, the four stood upon, opened wide.=C2=A0 There<br>was a sig=
    h of air rushing in as the passage opened, and the upon inspection,<br>ther=
    e was a discernable path leading downward into darkness.<br> &quot;WOW!&quo= t; =C2=A0RosterwReam grabbed a twig and immediately had fashioned a<br>torc=
    h, while Cheesecake Eater Lad and PK Kid looked on cautiously.<br> &quot;Yo=
    u know we really should get to the others before we start out on<br>this ad= venture.&quot; =C2=A0CheeseCake Eater said even more reluctantly.=C2=A0 Adv= enture<br>welled up in the hearts of the three heros and the curiosity was = nearly<br>incontainable. =C2=A0<br> &quot;Well what if we just looked in a =
    little bit.=C2=A0 We can always come back<br>out...&quot; =C2=A0RosterwReam=
    said stepping into the passage entrance. =C2=A0 The light of<br>the torch = illuminated RwR&#39;s steps a few feet in front of him and he slowly<br>pro= ceeded. =C2=A0<br> PK Kid had already begun to fashion himself a torch from=
    some of the<br>kindling that CheeseCake Eater and the others had collected=
    for a signal fire. <br>CheeseCake Eater as curious as the others succumbed=
    to the urge and soon he and<br>PK Kid were spellunking the deep dark compl= etely negligent of the others they<br>had left behind.<br> Procrastination =
    Boy eventually followed too.<br><br>** *** ** *** ** <br><br>=C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 [Scene down at the camp on the island of KLAG]<br><br> Ba=
    d Timing Boy, Kid Poetry and Opinionated Lad are each trying to<br>support =
    a very tautery BandWagon Chick who is attempting to get a coconut from<br>a=
    high palm.=C2=A0 TimeWaster Lad is amusing himself in the background with =
    a palm<br>frond.<br> &quot;Hey BandWagon Chick, tell me about your love for=
    Parking Karma Kid!?&quot; <br>Bad Timing Boy blurted out smiling.=C2=A0 Th= ere was no more keeping it in. =C2=A0<br> &quot;WHAOOAHG!&quot; =C2=A0Bandw=
    agon Chick warbled as she attempted not to fall from<br>the embarrassing qu= estion, but the structure of bodies is hardly engineering<br>sound and topp= les onto the sand.=C2=A0 BandWagon Chick grumbles as she wipes the<br>sand = off herself and her ever shrinking costume.<br> &quot;What did you have to =
    go and do that for!&quot; =C2=A0Kid Poetry said annoyed. <br>&quot;Now we w= ill never know the charms of the fair maiden&#39;s heart!&quot; =C2=A0<br> =
    &quot;OH GREAT!=C2=A0 I am stuck here with a bunch of gossipping twerps!=C2= =A0 If<br>Bandwagon Chick doesn&#39;t wish to talk, well then, she ...&quot=
    ; =C2=A0Opinionated Lad was<br>the worst when it came to gossip, and he kne=
    w he would want to know. &quot;had<br>better tell us soon! &quot; =C2=A0He = said grinning.<br> &quot;Hey Guys!=C2=A0 Back Off!=C2=A0 I think PK Kid is =
    a nice friend, and nothing<br>more!&quot; =C2=A0Bandwagon Chick said instin= ctively.<br> The LNHers were all disappointed, even TimeWaster Lad.=C2=A0 A= n audible<br>ahhhh could be heard as their hopes in hearing details of a to= rid lusty love <br>affair were deflated.=C2=A0 Then to keep things interest= ing BandWagon Chick added,<br>&quot;Besides!=C2=A0 Why should I pair myself=
    up with one handsome hero, when I can have<br>a whole LEGION of them!&quot=
    ; =C2=A0She winked at the guys who instantly came to life. <br>BandWagon Ch= ick sauntered away, into the bushes. =C2=A0<br> &quot;Woman!=C2=A0 No one k= nows the mystery!&quot; =C2=A0Kid Poetry sighed in admiration.<br> &quot;Yo=
    u got that right!&quot; =C2=A0Opinionated Lad said smiling. =C2=A0<br> In f= act all the LNHers left in camp were pretty pleased.=C2=A0 However that<br>= was about to change.=C2=A0 From the bushes near TimeWaster Lad is seen two = arms<br>reaching out.=C2=A0 They grab the unsuspecting hero and drag him ou=
    t of site. =C2=A0<br> <br> &quot;Did you hear something?&quot; Bad Timing B=
    oy spoke up. =C2=A0&quot;Where is<br>TimeWaster?&quot;<br> &quot;I don&#39;=
    t know and I don&#39;t care.&quot; Opinionate Lad said, then looking up<br>=
    at the coconut tree said. =C2=A0&quot;You know those coconuts look ripe eno= ugh, in my<br>opinion they should just FALL off the tree.&quot; =C2=A0<br> =
    And as if on cue they did.<br> BadTiming Boy is the next to disappear.<br> =
    &quot;Where did BadTiming Boy Go?=C2=A0 He was here just a second ago?!&quo=
    t; <br>Opinionated Lad said vehemently. =C2=A0&quot;He is never here to app= reciate my powers!&quot;<br> &quot;You know with all of us disappearing it = reminds me of a great poem. <br>And then there were none!&quot; =C2=A0<br> =
    Opinionated Lad turned toward the voice of Kid Poetry, but by now he<br>too=
    is gone.<br> &quot;Ok guys come out!=C2=A0 This is no longer funny!&quot; = =C2=A0and on cue a horde of<br>angry natives with human skulls on the end o=
    f their spears have the opionated<br>one surrounded.=C2=A0 In the backgroun=
    d is visible a Kid Poetry, Bad Timing Boy and<br>Time Waster Lad all gagged=
    and tied to poles!<br> &quot;Cripes... you can go hide again if you ... wa= hgnaght!&quot; =C2=A0Opinionated<br>Lad joins the bound and gagged!<br><br>=
    * ** *** ** *<br><br> &quot;So now that you have had your fill of food,=
    would you mind filling US<br>in on your idea.&quot; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja s= aid impatiently.<br> &quot;Well I just thought, that we being in the net.un= iverse it would be<br>quite easy to find a given bit pattern given enough i= nformation it won&#39;t be too<br>hard to create a search program that find=
    s the lost heroes rather quickly.&quot; <br>Renegade Programmer said linkin=
    g his portable keyboard into the onboard<br>computer of the Flight.thingy. = =C2=A0&quot;I should have this thing going in just a<br>sec...&quot; =C2=A0= Renegade Programmer said confidently. =C2=A0<br> &quot;How will you know ho=
    w to search for them?&quot; =C2=A0Occultism Kid said gazing<br>blankly into=
    the screen of scrolling text.<br> &quot;Oh well we will have to train on s=
    ome unique features that the<br>characters have.&quot; =C2=A0Renegade Progr= ammer said not even looking up or slowing to<br>answer the question.=C2=A0 = The others looked on despondent.=C2=A0 They had no idea how to<br>help, and=
    the last thing they wanted to do is get in the way of the guy that<br>was = nearly impossible to get him do what you wanted!<br> &quot;...and now add t= he jiffy sort and then add a few cofangulation<br>factors...&quot; =C2=A0Re= negade Programmer mumbled as he typed, and then addressing the<br>group. = =C2=A0&quot;You know one way you could help is find some unique searching s= equence<br>among the names of your lost heroes while I type this in.=C2=A0 =
    I will just hard<br>code the search...&quot;<br> &quot;Well they all have t=
    hings that are fairly common on the net... Kid<br>Poetry, BandWagon Chick, = Procrastination Boy, TimeWaster Lad, Opinionated Lad,<br>most of these are = well known characterwize, and not all that unique.&quot; Ultimate<br>Ninja = murmurred.<br>=C2=A0 &quot;Well there isn&#39;t much discussion about Parki= ng Karma or Cheesecake <br>Eaters!&quot; =C2=A0Deja Dude added. <br> &quot;= And I don&#39;t know about you, but I RosterwReam is the most unique thing<= br>around.&quot; Occultism Kid said, thinking of his adventures with him.<b= r>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 &quot;... OK so it is RosterwReam, then... I = will hard code it and try it<br>out...&quot; =C2=A0Renegade Programmer said=
    . =C2=A0&quot;... Let&#39;s give this thing a try... =C2=A0<br>cc try.c , a=
    nd link and &quot; =C2=A0<br> All of a sudden the flight.thingy&#39;s engin= es roared and the vehicle<br>flung itself back into the sky. =C2=A0&quot;IS=
    IT WORKING!?&quot; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja yelled above<br>the roar of the en= gines.<br> &quot;Yeah, I think so... ONly one way to know for sure!&quot; =
    =C2=A0Renegade<br>Programmer said examining the minimal visual out put he h=
    ad provided as<br>indicators of program functions. =C2=A0&quot;That will be=
    if we find them!=C2=A0 The<br>flight.thingy should bring us directly to th=
    e whereabouts of RosterwReam.&quot;<br><br> * * * * * * * *<br><br> &quot;=
    THERE IT IS!=C2=A0 NETTER LIBERATION FRONT!=C2=A0 THE ISLAND OF KLAG!&quot;=
    =C2=A0Lagneto<br>announced to his crew as they all flew toward the island.= =C2=A0 Lagneto had caused<br>the air to lag beneath them and so those that = couldn&#39;t fly were propelled by to<br>force of the antilag-backlash he h=
    ad caused in the airflow.<br> &quot;Look SMOKE!&quot; =C2=A0Onomato-Puweeha=
    Person yelled.<br> &quot;Oh how lovely!&quot; cried Ice Hot.<br> &quot;Loo=
    ks like we will start our search there, eh boss?&quot; =C2=A0Pylon said<br>= grinning.<br> &quot;NEVER TELL ME WHAT WE DO OR DON&#39;T DO!&quot; =C2=A0L= agneto said indignantly. =C2=A0&quot;I<br>SAY WE SEARCH THE SMOKE!&quot;<br=
    &quot;Good Choice Lag!&quot; =C2=A0Girl Next Door said smiling innocently=
    .<br> Mistake molded his face into a contorted mocking face and oodled Pylo= n<br>just to get on his case.=C2=A0 Pylon infuriated yelled, &quot;BOSS!=C2= =A0 Mistake is making<br>face at me!&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;I was not!&quot= ; =C2=A0Mistake says checking to see if Lagneto even looks. He<br>doesn&#39= ;t.=C2=A0 So he made another face.<br> &quot;BOOOOSSSS!?&quot; =C2=A0<br> &=
    quot;You kids be quiet or I will drop you both here!&quot; =C2=A0Lagneto sa= id<br>frustratedly... &quot;Stupid fools!=C2=A0 I can&#39;t take them anywh= ere!&quot;<br><br>*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***<br><br> &quot;Stu=
    pid Men!=C2=A0 I should say BOYS!=C2=A0 Always trying to check out the most=
    <br>buxom of the hero babes!&quot; =C2=A0Bandwagon Chick mumbled to hersel=
    f. =C2=A0&quot;For once I<br>would love a man that was more than just a bun=
    ch of hormones...=C2=A0 Someone who<br>really like to cuddle.=C2=A0 And be = warm and nice, and ...it wouldn&#39;t hurt if he<br>were cute... =C2=A0 Wel=
    l who am I fooling!?=C2=A0 I am in a comic world, there is no <br>such thin= g...&quot;<br> Just then Bandwagon Chick&#39;s conversation is interrupted = by rustling in<br>the bushes.=C2=A0 It is just about enough.=C2=A0 Bandwago=
    n Chick had obliged the fellows<br>with a little flirt, but to follow her i= nto the woods, and evesdrop! =C2=A0well that<br>was the final straw! =C2=A0=
    <br> &quot;All Right Come out of the bushes!&quot; =C2=A0Bandwagon Chick co=
    mmanded, picking<br>up a big stick. =C2=A0&quot;Get out here now.&quot; =C2= =A0<br> &quot;Please don&#39;t hurt me, I only curious...&quot; =C2=A0A str= ange voice said as he<br>stepped from the bushes. =C2=A0&quot;Please, I mea=
    n no harm to you.&quot;<br> A young man well built wearing only a loin clot=
    h walked out of the<br>bushes.=C2=A0 His arms were open, He was somewhat fu= zzy and had blond hair.=C2=A0 His<br>feature were hard to describe, but all=
    that BandWagon Chick could think of was<br>of how cute he was.=C2=A0 He ju=
    st looked cute! How could this be!?=C2=A0 Was it his<br>special power?=C2=
    =A0 Bandwagon chick was not frightened and asked. =C2=A0&quot;Who are you?&= quot;<br> &quot;I don&#39;t know.&quot; =C2=A0the man replied. =C2=A0&quot;=
    But the natives call me, Hamster<br>Man.&quot;<br> &quot;Hamster Man!?=C2= =A0 Why?&quot; =C2=A0Bandwagon Chick said smiling.<br> &quot;I think it bec= ause of the day of big crash.=C2=A0 My dear ones are left me<br>and not wak=
    e up, so I am small and tiny and need love.=C2=A0 I am found by a kindly<br= >hamster and he give me magic and strength and teach me ways of wild.=C2=A0=
    I have<br>the powers of my dear one the hamsters.&quot;<br> &quot;Are you = saying you were raised by hamsters?&quot; =C2=A0BandWagon Chick said<br>inc= redulously. =C2=A0<br> &quot;Yes, and I can do hamster things!&quot;<br> &q=
    uot;Like what?&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;Run very fast...Climb stuff...Look cu= te...Chew things...Look cute<br>Store food in my cheeks... and did I mentio=
    n ...look cute...&quot; <br> &quot;Is that it?&quot; =C2=A0Bandwagon Chick = said with an eyebrow raised.<br> &quot;Well, I be warm and cuddly!?&quot; =
    =C2=A0Hamster Man said with a smile.<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 BandWag=
    on Chick blushed.<br> &quot;Can you help us get out?&quot;<br> &quot;us?&qu=
    ot;<br> &quot;Yeah me and my friends!&quot;<br> &quot;Oh you mean the one w= ith the bad timed mouth, and the one with the big<br>mouth and the one that=
    talks in poems and the one who...&quot;<br> &quot;Yeah yeah, that&#39;s th= em...&quot;<br> &quot;Oh well they cannot be helped, they are gonna be eate= n.&quot;<br> &quot;WHAT!?!&quot; BandWagon Chick gasped.<br> &quot;They wer= e captured by Jungle Queen and her fearsome cannibal<br>warriors!!!&quot;<b= r>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 &quot;Well we have got to do something to res= cue them!&quot; =C2=A0BandWagon Chick<br>said determined.<br> &quot;I will = help you, too!&quot; =C2=A0Hamster Man said excitedly.<br> BandWagon Chick =
    gave a sigh and thought, you know, he really is cute.<br><br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0*** =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ***<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ** =C2=A0******= *** =C2=A0**<br> * =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 *********************** =C2=A0 *=
    <br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ** =C2=A0********* =C2=A0**<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0*** =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ***<br><br> &quot;MacLaughlin Man, You&#39;re o=
    n in two minutes!&quot; =C2=A0Net.Star yelled into the<br>entry way where a=
    well dressed politician, aged and onery. <br> &quot;Yeah, Yeah I will be o=
    n in just a second!&quot; =C2=A0MacLaughlin Man yelled.<br> &quot;I need mo=
    re dirt on the LNH!=C2=A0 Lately my ratings have skyrocketed since<br>I sta= rted libelling the LNH and I need more dirt!&quot; =C2=A0he muttered to him= self.<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 Just then from the shadows is raised a=
    gun and the figure of a man<br>aiming at the back side of MacLaughlin Man =
    is clearly viewed. =C2=A0<br> &quot;SHRRRACK!&quot; The gun blows off, the = figure of MacLaughlin Man explodes<br>in blood, the body falls down dead an=
    d mangled.The studio bursts with<br>commotion and in the chaos is heard abo=
    ve the rest, even if it is in whisper...<br><br> &quot;Net.Justice is serve=
    d!&quot;<br><br> The assasin is gone.<br> &quot;OH MY GOODNESS!=C2=A0 OH MY=
    GOODNESS!&quot; =C2=A0Cried Net.Star.<br> &quot;What!?&quot; =C2=A0MacLaug=
    hlin Man enters from a closet close by.<br> &quot;You are ALIVE!?&quot; Dra=
    matizer cried dramatically! <br> &quot;OF course I am!=C2=A0 But I am going=
    to have to get myself another stunt<br>double!&quot; =C2=A0MacLaughlin Man=
    said cynically as he viewed the parts of his<br>unfortunate double strewn = across the dressing room.<br> &quot;Aren&#39;t you the least bit scared!?&q= uot; =C2=A0Romantic Innuendo asked.<br> &quot;A bit!=C2=A0 But at least NOW=
    I have a story!=C2=A0 And I know just WHO to <br>blame for this fiasco!&qu= ot; =C2=A0MacLaughlin Man said sinisterly.<br> <br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0*** =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ***<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ** =C2=A0********* =C2= =A0**<br> * =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 *********************** =C2=A0 *<br>=C2=
    =A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ** =C2=A0********* =C2=A0**<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 = =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2= =A0*** =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ***<br><br> &quot;Uhhh...=C2=A0 Guys, I am not that pa=
    latable!&quot; =C2=A0Opinionate Lad cried as <br>his gag was replaced with =
    a turnip. =C2=A0<br> &quot;Please don&#39;t eat me!&quot; =C2=A0Bad Timing = Boy cried in panic.<br> &quot;You know this reminds me of a musical!&quot; = =C2=A0Kid Poetry exclaimed. =C2=A0&quot;The<br>History of the world My swee=
    t, is who get&#39;s eaten and who gets to Eat!&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;You k= now if they are going to tie us up the least they could do is let<br>us hav=
    e some terminal or something so we could MUD!&quot; =C2=A0TimeWaster Lad pr= otested<br>indignantly. =C2=A0<br> The native cannibals danced wildly aroun=
    d a large fire.=C2=A0 The jungle<br>beating down in a natural rhythm felt l= ike a great place to dance.<br> &quot;What are they waiting for!?=C2=A0 Why=
    don&#39;t they just stew us and get it<br>over with!?&quot; =C2=A0Bad Timi=
    ng Boy cried out in panic. =C2=A0<br> Suddenly the drums went silent, and a= ll eyes turned to the central hut.<br>The entire hut shuddered as the lead = witch in the camp =C2=A0made her way out of the<br>ceremonial abode adorned=
    in a HUGE costume and mask that dwarfed her in size. =C2=A0<br> &quot;OOOO=
    OOGGABOOOGAHBOAOOSGHA!&quot; =C2=A0The Jungle Queen cried out in =C2=A0<br>= magookian garble.<br> &quot;Any more wishes, Alladin?&quot; =C2=A0Kid Poetr= y muttered to Bad Timing Boy who<br>was biting his lip.<br> It looked prett=
    y hopeless as the heroes stood on the edge of the fire<br>pit, preparing fo=
    r their barbecque. =C2=A0&quot;Well it&#39;s been nice knowing you.&quot; T= ime<br>Waster Lad said to Bad Timing Boy. =C2=A0<br> <br> All of a sudden a=
    comotion from the sky caused the natives to abandon<br>their apetites. =C2= =A0&quot;UBAKA!=C2=A0 UBAKA DOO MAHKAHKA NIDDIYONK!&quot; =C2=A0 They cried=
    pointing!<br> &quot;Oh For JOY!=C2=A0 We are saved!&quot; =C2=A0 Bad Timin=
    g Boy said with relief.<br> &quot;OH I WOULDN&#39;T SAY THAT!&quot; =C2=A0L=
    agneto said Smiling! =C2=A0&quot;I would say you are<br>about to make a jum=
    p from out of their frying pan and into our FIRE!&quot;<br> &quot;Ice Hot w=
    ill see to that!&quot;<br><br> ** *** **** *** **<br><br> &quot;There Look=
    !?&quot; =C2=A0RosterwReam said excitedly. =C2=A0&quot;THE RUNG OF REVAMP! = =C2=A0I<br>can&#39;t believe we found it!&quot; =C2=A0<br> Cheesecake Eater=
    Lad cautiously approached the holy relic of comics. <br>&quot;I don&#39;t = like this, it has been too easy!&quot;<br> &quot;I say we leave it and get =
    out of here!&quot; =C2=A0PK Kid said.=C2=A0 Procrastination<br>Boy nodded. = =C2=A0<br> &quot;And let this great chance to make history skip us by!?=C2=
    =A0 Haven&#39;t you<br>noticed!?=C2=A0 No one has come to rescue us because=
    we are NOBODIES!=C2=A0 We haven&#39;t<br>got any great powers!!=C2=A0 The = rung of Revamp can change all that!&quot;<br> &quot;Hey!=C2=A0 RosterwReam = I know taking care of the roster is a drag, but<br>you have had some good a= dventures! &quot; =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad reasoned. =C2=A0&quot;Now<br>l= et&#39;s get out of here before Lagneto catches us!&quot;<br> &quot;NO!=C2= =A0 I refuse to let this happen?!=C2=A0 If we are revamped we are certain<b= r>to get powers that can stop even LAGNETO!&quot; =C2=A0RosterwReam shouted=
    wildly!<br> &quot;But we have the power to stop him!=C2=A0 Don&#39;t you s= ee!?=C2=A0 Ultimate Ninja<br>sent us after him because he thought we could =
    do it!&quot; =C2=A0Cheesecake Eater Lad<br>said trying to hold out the into= xicating thoughts of having an energy blast<br>instead of a cheesecake squi= rter. =C2=A0<br> &quot;or was he trying to get rid of us.&quot; =C2=A0Procr=
    astination Boy said<br>unsuredly.<br> &quot;Don&#39;t say that!&quot; =C2= =A0CheeseCake Eater lad pled. =C2=A0&quot;Don&#39;t grab the rung...&quot;<=
    It was too late.=C2=A0 RosterwReam grabbed ahold of the rung and immedi=
    ately<br>the walls shook...=C2=A0 A Deep voice resounded about the cavern w= alls and pierced<br>each of them to their hearts.=C2=A0 RosterwReam was enc= ased in a shower of<br>crystaline light and levitated, drawn up in a corona=
    of raw energy of the rung.<br> &quot;CHOOSE YOUR POWERS ACCORDING TO YOUR = PERSON&quot; <br> &quot;YOUR DESIRE&quot; <br> &quot;YOUR WILL&quot; =C2=A0=
    The voice boomed.<br> &quot;BECOME A HERO ANEW&quot; =C2=A0at the finish of=
    the words RosterwReam is<br>enveloped in a fountain of light.=C2=A0 The po= wer that was there is immediately<br>sucked back into the rung, and Rosterw= Ream is once again standing on the <br>pedestal that held the rung.=C2=A0 T=
    he rung is inert in his hands, and RosterwReam<br>speaks. <br> &quot;What h= as happened?&quot; =C2=A0wReamhack murmured?<br> &quot;You look the same.&q=
    uot; =C2=A0CheeseCake Eater Lad said scrutinizing his<br>person...<br> &quo= t;Except for your change in costume... There are no more mini roster<br>lis= tings on your person!&quot; =C2=A0Parking Karma Kid said amazed.<br> Procra= stination Boy just stood amazed, pondering all the neat things he<br>would =
    do with his new powers.<br> &quot;Well can you fly?&quot; =C2=A0CheeseCake =
    Eater Lad asked.<br> &quot;Well no, my powers haven&#39;t really changed al= l that much...&quot; =C2=A0the old<br>RosterwReam said smiling. =C2=A0&quot= ;But I think this will be for the better.&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;Well who a=
    re you now?&quot; =C2=A0Parking Karma Kid said.<br> &quot;I am wReamhack!= =C2=A0 My powers are computer related!=C2=A0 I am a computer<br>hacker extr= aordinaire!&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;Oh GOOD CHOICE OF Powers!&quot; PK Kid s= aid sarcastically. =C2=A0&quot;Here we are<br>stranded on an island that is=
    inhabited by who knows what and the closest<br>computer is thousands of mi= les away and you happen to wish for change to be a<br>HACKER!?&quot; =C2=A0=
    <br> &quot;Well I will be happier this way!&quot; =C2=A0wReamhack protested=
    .<br> &quot;It is sorta, ironic.=C2=A0 Irony Man would have loved you!&quot= ; =C2=A0CheeseCake<br>Eater Lad said smiling. =C2=A0&quot;But at least you = can hold the rung!=C2=A0 Now lets get out<br>of here and find the others.&q= uot; =C2=A0CheeseCake Eater Lad lit another torch (he had<br>thought ahead =
    to take extra materials) and headed out of the cavern.=C2=A0 The<br>others = followed.<br> &quot;I still think you should have wished for some powers li= ke super<br>strength or something!&quot; =C2=A0PK Kid said disappointedly.<=
    &quot;It doesn&#39;t work that way!&quot; wReamhack tried to explain.=
    =C2=A0 The arguing<br>echoed through the cave.<br> In the dark Procrastinat=
    ion Boy lagged behind.=C2=A0 Hey Guys, I wanna try<br>that rung thing!=C2=
    =A0 I want new powers, He thought.=C2=A0 I will tell them later I<br>guess.=
    .. =C2=A0<br><br>* * * * * * * * * *<br>* * * * * * * * * *<br><br> &quot;K=
    APUTZ!&quot; Renegade Programmer&#39;s program fumbled and sputtered.=C2=A0=
    The<br>Flight.Thingy spun out of control. =C2=A0<br> &quot;What has happen= ed?&quot; Ultimate Ninja grabbed the controls and dragged on<br>them. =C2= =A0<br> &quot;It isn&#39;t possible!=C2=A0 How?&quot; =C2=A0Renegade Progra= mmer agonized. =C2=A0&quot;My program<br>was flawless!=C2=A0 I checked it!&= quot;<br> &quot;Well it is happening!&quot; Occultism Kid observed astutely=
    .<br> &quot;What does it all mean?!&quot; =C2=A0Deja Dude said trying to ga= in hold of<br>something stable in the whirling craft...<br> &quot;IT means =
    according to my calculations we are gonna crash into that<br>ISLAND!&quot; = =C2=A0Theory Man hypothesized frantically.<br> Just then Ultimate Ninja man= aged to gain control of the flight.thingy.<br> &quot;I HAD A lock on HIM!= =C2=A0 He was on the island!?&quot; =C2=A0Renegade Programmer hit<br>the ke=
    ys to his keyboard but it didn&#39;t help.<br> &quot;What has happened!?&qu= ot; Ultimate Ninja demanded.<br> &quot;RosterwReam is no longer on the isla=
    nd!=C2=A0 Or for that matter ANYWHERE<br>in the net.universe!&quot;<br> &qu= ot;You mean he&#39;s...&quot; =C2=A0Occultism Kid said reluctantly. =C2=A0&= quot;... dead ...&quot;<br> &quot;Worse.=C2=A0 He&#39;s gone completely!=C2=
    =A0 Ceased to exist!&quot; Renegade Programmer <br>said anxiously...<br> Ju=
    st then MTMan came accross the intercom. =C2=A0&quot;Uh guys, guess who jus= t<br>showed up here?&quot; =C2=A0<br> &quot;Who?&quot; =C2=A0Deja Dude said=
    sullenly.<br> &quot;CANNON FODDER!&quot; =C2=A0MTMan said surprised.<br> A=
    ll those present in the flight.thingy had an lump in their throats... <br>U= ltimate Ninja looked over the tiny island through tears that could not be s= een<br>by his teammates.=C2=A0 A tuft of smoke billowed from the center of = the island at<br>the base of a high cliff front. =C2=A0<br> &quot;GUYS!=C2= =A0 Smoke!=C2=A0 We&#39;re GOING IN!&quot; =C2=A0Ultimate Ninja said with a= nger in his<br>voice.<br><br> **** **** **** **** ****<br> =C2=A0 <br> =
    =C2=A0Obviously NOT the END! =C2=A0but we&#39;re getting there!<br><br><br>= NEXT ISSUE:<br><br>Last issue I promised: (and other stuff that I delivered=
    .) Well <br><br>I will promise it next time instead...=C2=A0 PROMISE! =C2= =A0(...maybe...)<br>*******************************************************= **********************<br> ** Kid Kirby gets more action.<br> ** wReamed Ac=
    ton Lord is RESURRECTED!<br>***********************************************= ******************************<br><br> along with...<br><br> ** The real po= wers of wReamhack<br> ** A REALLY BIG BATTLE -- (Uh Jef, wanna help me writ= e the NLF?)<br> ** MacLaughlin Man and wReamicus scheme some schemes...<br>=
    ** Hamster Man and BandWagon Chick get into the action...<br> ** The Nativ=
    e Cannibals finally get something to EAT!<br> ** Onomato-Puweeha Person is = NO MORE!<br>=C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 =C2=A0 ** Cannon Fodder&#39;s Murderer is = Revealed!<br> ** Another assasination by the scourge of Net.Justice!<br> **=
    Invisible Incendiary gets a spot of revenge...<br><br> ** And as always: = =C2=A0 More fun and Mayhem !!!<br><br><br> wReam...<br><br>P.S.=C2=A0=
    Now if only I could get all my homework done! :)<br><br>P.P.S.=C2=A0 Every= one Welcome our newest LNHer!=C2=A0 Hamster Man <br><br> (From Sweden!!) =
    =C2=A0 (Daniel Falk -- <a href=3D"mailto:d91-fad@tekn.hj.se">d91-fad@tekn.h= j.se</a>) <br><br><br><br><br>=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D<br><br>Next We= ek: =C2=A0Some more JUNGLE CHEESECAKE!!!!!<br><br>=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D= =3D=3D<br><br>Arthur &quot;Same Classic Channel.=C2=A0 But Same Time?=C2=A0=
    Probably not.&quot; Spitzer <br><br><br><br></div>

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