Babylon Bee - America's Newspaper of Record: Top 10 Reasons To Move To California
With the population of California diminishing of late, we at The Babylon
Bee are here to help turn the tide. Here are just ten of the many great reasons why you should turn that U-Haul around and head to the Golden
State:
Free smoke: Every year, the state burns down entire forests to provide citizens with free smoke. Neat!
Overcome your attachment to material goods: It's easy when the
government takes all your income.
Thar's gold in them thar hills!: That's why it's called the Golden State.
Amazing restaurants like the French Laundry: Peasants like you can't eat there, but it's cool knowing it's there.
Incredible high-speed rail system: Coming summer of 2096.
Hobo Steve: He's the nicest hobo you'll ever meet. Aw, Steve.
Rice-a-roni, the San Francisco treat: Mm-mm. Delicious.
Kids be learning how to talk that good English: No other school system
in the country be teaching kids like this.
Thousands of hospices to choose from: All within a one-mile radius. Incredible.
Beautiful views of the stars during grid blackouts: Unless there's the
free smoke.
What more could you want? Pack your bags and head out west, folks.
Babylon Bee - America's Newspaper of Record: Top 10 Reasons To Move To California
With the population of California diminishing of late, we at The Babylon
Bee are here to help turn the tide. Here are just ten of the many great reasons why you should turn that U-Haul around and head to the Golden
State:
Free smoke: Every year, the state burns down entire forests to provide citizens with free smoke. Neat!
Overcome your attachment to material goods: It's easy when the
government takes all your income.
Thar's gold in them thar hills!: That's why it's called the Golden State.
Amazing restaurants like the French Laundry: Peasants like you can't eat there, but it's cool knowing it's there.
Incredible high-speed rail system: Coming summer of 2096.
Hobo Steve: He's the nicest hobo you'll ever meet. Aw, Steve.
Rice-a-roni, the San Francisco treat: Mm-mm. Delicious.
Kids be learning how to talk that good English: No other school system
in the country be teaching kids like this.
Thousands of hospices to choose from: All within a one-mile radius. Incredible.
Beautiful views of the stars during grid blackouts: Unless there's the
free smoke.
What more could you want? Pack your bags and head out west, folks.
On 8/11/2026 9:27 PM, Dude wrote:
Babylon Bee - America's Newspaper of Record: Top 10 Reasons To Move To California
With the population of California diminishing of late, we at The Babylon Bee are here to help turn the tide. Here are just ten of the many great reasons why you should turn that U-Haul around and head to the Golden State:
Free smoke: Every year, the state burns down entire forests to provide citizens with free smoke. Neat!
Overcome your attachment to material goods: It's easy when the
government takes all your income.
Thar's gold in them thar hills!: That's why it's called the Golden State.
Amazing restaurants like the French Laundry: Peasants like you can't eat there, but it's cool knowing it's there.
Incredible high-speed rail system: Coming summer of 2096.
Hobo Steve: He's the nicest hobo you'll ever meet. Aw, Steve.
Rice-a-roni, the San Francisco treat: Mm-mm. Delicious.
Kids be learning how to talk that good English: No other school system
in the country be teaching kids like this.
Thousands of hospices to choose from: All within a one-mile radius. Incredible.
Beautiful views of the stars during grid blackouts: Unless there's the free smoke.
What more could you want? Pack your bags and head out west, folks.
The only known reserves of recoverable gold in Kalifornia are in the
pockets of the citizens.
Wilson <Wilson@nowhere.invalid> posted:
On 8/11/2026 9:27 PM, Dude wrote:The gold is in the hands of the tech bros and it's not recoverable by
Babylon Bee - America's Newspaper of Record: Top 10 Reasons To Move To
California
With the population of California diminishing of late, we at The Babylon >>> Bee are here to help turn the tide. Here are just ten of the many great
reasons why you should turn that U-Haul around and head to the Golden
State:
Free smoke: Every year, the state burns down entire forests to provide
citizens with free smoke. Neat!
Overcome your attachment to material goods: It's easy when the
government takes all your income.
Thar's gold in them thar hills!: That's why it's called the Golden State. >>>
Amazing restaurants like the French Laundry: Peasants like you can't eat >>> there, but it's cool knowing it's there.
Incredible high-speed rail system: Coming summer of 2096.
Hobo Steve: He's the nicest hobo you'll ever meet. Aw, Steve.
Rice-a-roni, the San Francisco treat: Mm-mm. Delicious.
Kids be learning how to talk that good English: No other school system
in the country be teaching kids like this.
Thousands of hospices to choose from: All within a one-mile radius.
Incredible.
Beautiful views of the stars during grid blackouts: Unless there's the
free smoke.
What more could you want? Pack your bags and head out west, folks.
The only known reserves of recoverable gold in Kalifornia are in the
pockets of the citizens.
the citizens. The gold goes out of state.
So, just let me say that, as an ex-military brat, there probably no
ideal place to live.
That being said, the ideal place to live is in a house that's paid for
They say the best location is walking distance to a liquor store, a grocery store and a drug store. YMMV.
On Aug 12, 2026 at 3:11:26rC>PM EDT, "Dude" <user2891@newsgrouper.org.invalid>
wrote:
Wilson <Wilson@nowhere.invalid> posted:
On 8/11/2026 9:27 PM, Dude wrote:The gold is in the hands of the tech bros and it's not recoverable by
Babylon Bee - America's Newspaper of Record: Top 10 Reasons To Move To >>>> California
With the population of California diminishing of late, we at The Babylon >>>> Bee are here to help turn the tide. Here are just ten of the many great >>>> reasons why you should turn that U-Haul around and head to the Golden
State:
Free smoke: Every year, the state burns down entire forests to provide >>>> citizens with free smoke. Neat!
Overcome your attachment to material goods: It's easy when the
government takes all your income.
Thar's gold in them thar hills!: That's why it's called the Golden State. >>>>
Amazing restaurants like the French Laundry: Peasants like you can't eat >>>> there, but it's cool knowing it's there.
Incredible high-speed rail system: Coming summer of 2096.
Hobo Steve: He's the nicest hobo you'll ever meet. Aw, Steve.
Rice-a-roni, the San Francisco treat: Mm-mm. Delicious.
Kids be learning how to talk that good English: No other school system >>>> in the country be teaching kids like this.
Thousands of hospices to choose from: All within a one-mile radius.
Incredible.
Beautiful views of the stars during grid blackouts: Unless there's the >>>> free smoke.
What more could you want? Pack your bags and head out west, folks.
The only known reserves of recoverable gold in Kalifornia are in the
pockets of the citizens.
the citizens. The gold goes out of state.
So, just let me say that, as an ex-military brat, there probably no
ideal place to live.
Yes there is. To each their own perspective.
That being said, the ideal place to live is in a house that's paid for
Paid for is always the best.
They say the best location is walking distance to a liquor store, a grocery >> store and a drug store. YMMV.
I say the best location has to be two. #1 - an apartment near Bloor & Yonge, Cumberland St., Toronto (preferabley owned). and #2 - a cottage on a remote lake in northern Ontario- lots of lake frontage, Pines and pre-cambrian Shield
granite.
Facing south/west! :)
On 8/11/2026 9:27 PM, Dude wrote:
Babylon Bee - America's Newspaper of Record: Top 10 Reasons To Move To
California
With the population of California diminishing of late, we at The
Babylon Bee are here to help turn the tide. Here are just ten of the
many great reasons why you should turn that U-Haul around and head to
the Golden State:
Free smoke: Every year, the state burns down entire forests to provide
citizens with free smoke. Neat!
Overcome your attachment to material goods: It's easy when the
government takes all your income.
Thar's gold in them thar hills!: That's why it's called the Golden State.
Amazing restaurants like the French Laundry: Peasants like you can't
eat there, but it's cool knowing it's there.
Incredible high-speed rail system: Coming summer of 2096.
Hobo Steve: He's the nicest hobo you'll ever meet. Aw, Steve.
Rice-a-roni, the San Francisco treat: Mm-mm. Delicious.
Kids be learning how to talk that good English: No other school system
in the country be teaching kids like this.
Thousands of hospices to choose from: All within a one-mile radius.
Incredible.
Beautiful views of the stars during grid blackouts: Unless there's the
free smoke.
What more could you want? Pack your bags and head out west, folks.
The only known reserves of recoverable gold in Kalifornia are in the
pockets of the citizens.
On 8/11/26 6:27 PM, Dude wrote:
Babylon Bee - America's Newspaper of Record: Top 10 Reasons To Move To
California
With the population of California diminishing of late, we at The
Babylon Bee are here to help turn the tide. Here are just ten of the
many great reasons why you should turn that U-Haul around and head to
the Golden State:
Free smoke: Every year, the state burns down entire forests to provide
citizens with free smoke. Neat!
Overcome your attachment to material goods: It's easy when the
government takes all your income.
Thar's gold in them thar hills!: That's why it's called the Golden State.
Amazing restaurants like the French Laundry: Peasants like you can't
eat there, but it's cool knowing it's there.
Incredible high-speed rail system: Coming summer of 2096.
Hobo Steve: He's the nicest hobo you'll ever meet. Aw, Steve.
Rice-a-roni, the San Francisco treat: Mm-mm. Delicious.
Kids be learning how to talk that good English: No other school system
in the country be teaching kids like this.
Thousands of hospices to choose from: All within a one-mile radius.
Incredible.
Beautiful views of the stars during grid blackouts: Unless there's the
free smoke.
What more could you want? Pack your bags and head out west, folks.
unlike most people on this planet, ur free to leave dud
or even better find a grave already!
On 8/11/2026 9:50 PM, dart200 wrote:
On 8/11/26 6:27 PM, Dude wrote:So, I came here to get enlightened.
Babylon Bee - America's Newspaper of Record: Top 10 Reasons To Move
To California
With the population of California diminishing of late, we at The
Babylon Bee are here to help turn the tide. Here are just ten of the
many great reasons why you should turn that U-Haul around and head to
the Golden State:
Free smoke: Every year, the state burns down entire forests to
provide citizens with free smoke. Neat!
Overcome your attachment to material goods: It's easy when the
government takes all your income.
Thar's gold in them thar hills!: That's why it's called the Golden
State.
Amazing restaurants like the French Laundry: Peasants like you can't
eat there, but it's cool knowing it's there.
Incredible high-speed rail system: Coming summer of 2096.
Hobo Steve: He's the nicest hobo you'll ever meet. Aw, Steve.
Rice-a-roni, the San Francisco treat: Mm-mm. Delicious.
Kids be learning how to talk that good English: No other school
system in the country be teaching kids like this.
Thousands of hospices to choose from: All within a one-mile radius.
Incredible.
Beautiful views of the stars during grid blackouts: Unless there's
the free smoke.
What more could you want? Pack your bags and head out west, folks.
unlike most people on this planet, ur free to leave dud
or even better find a grave already!
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