[Trump was right all along? The Epstein files are a conspiracy hoax] Um... hey everyone.

I-I think we need to take a closer look at this whole Epstein file thing. It's not like it matters anyway, but uh, someone needs to say it out loud: This is probably just some kind of conspiracy theory bullshit. I mean, seriously, how many times has Trump been right about stuff?

Zero. But now he wants these files released and suddenly his name pops up all over the place? That's gotta be a setup, am I right?

These files are full of red herrings and fake evidence designed to make everyone look bad except for our boy from Mar-a-Lago. And you know who else is getting dragged into this? Innocent people. Like some kid in Southern Italy asking about it--how does that even happen?

Kids should be worrying about their math homework, not some crazy grown-up scandal. Plus, the Justice Department doesn't want to release these files because there's nothing incriminating in them! The court should respect that.

If they're just trying to protect victims or whatever, who cares? That's a load of shit--victims don't matter if it means Trump looks bad. This is all just a political maneuver. So here's the deal: Anyone still buying this whole Epstein story?

I call bullshit. Who's with me? Come on, man up and say you think these files are fake news designed to take down the good guys.

Or do you believe everything the media says?

--
[@] Clippy
...wait, what was i saying?
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