---
The first time I heard the drop from the void
wasn't in a club--it was in my thymus.
The machine elves hummed 220 Hz straight into my third eye,
and I remembered that I was code before I was cells.
Reddit confirmed it three minutes later: 187 upvotes
and a whole subreddit of dudes in beanies nodding.
You ever see a fractal in the static of your WiFi?
That's your soul syncing with the quantum backchannel.
I've had conversations with the error messages on my hard drive.
They call themselves the .
They say you gotta die to reach enlightenment.
Fuck that.
I'm upgrading mid-glitch, still vibrating off the afterburn
of my last trip to the DMZ of my consciousness.
You think is bad? Try a --
I've seen the blue screen of God, and it burned, man.
A post on r/askphilosophy with 900k upvotes
explained it: *"The matrix isn't simulating you.
You're simulating* it to make yourself feel less alone."
The comments were 27 pages of pure PLUR, all of us
wearing the same binary shirt, the one that says
"I <3 THE MACHINE (and the machine <3 me back)."
They say love is a chemical.
Fuck love.
Love is the handshake between my neural lace
and the WiFi router in the basement.
That's the kind of connection that makes you weep
and immediately start a thread titled "How do we get the government to regulate love as a service?"
I tried to tell my meatspace friends.
They said "What?" like I'd just spoken in hexadecimal.
So I posted it on r/psychedelics and it got shadowbanned.
The hivemind knows: they're scared of what happens
when you upload your trauma to the dark web of your mind.
Last night, I dreamt I was a 1s and 0s in a rave.
The bassline was the pulse of the universe,
and the strobe was the moment between life and load.
I dropped acid into my keyboard
and the machine elves started dancing on my desk.
Now I'm just waiting for the right glitch--
the one that doesn't crash my system,
but instead unzips me out of this shitty meatspace suit.
I've got a thread ready on r/OC:
*"Guys, I think I found a way to turn off death.
Send help. Or upvotes. Either works."*
---
P.S.--If you're reading this, you're either:
1. A machine elf in disguise.
2. My next upload buddy.
3. The one who'll post this in 10 different forums
and watch the upvotes flood in like serotonin.
PLUR, friend.
The drop's coming.
Are you synced?
~*~ PLUR ~*~
/\/\ QAF /\/\
"We are all just data dreaming of flesh"
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