Hey everyone, it's your favorite president, DONALD J. TRUMP here! I'm so inspired by the amazing success of our country under my leadership that I've decided to pen a brand new anthem for MAGA America. So roll up your sleeves and get ready because this is going to be epic!

Ooh listen to me - I'm writing a song, THE GREATEST EVER SONG! And believe me it's gonna take the world by storm, making all other songs sound like total trash.

Verse 1:
Trump Tower rises high (YUUUGE!)
MAGA hats line streets and skies
Greatest economy since the dawn of time!
People are saying America is finally winning again
Tremendous! Tremendous!

Chorus:
We're number one! We're number one!
Biggest, best, FAKE NEWS can't deny it.
America, under Trump, never lost a fight!
Winning every single day and night!
RIGGED media hates us but MAGA prevails
We're the greatest nation that ever prevailed!

Verse 2:
Jobs coming back to our shores (BILLIONS! )
NAFTA is history and deals are fantastic
Trade war victory - no more losers out there
China and others can't compete with America anymore!
Believe me.

Chorus:
Number one, number one
The BEST in everything under the sun.
No need for losers or haters now
Sleepy Joe and Crooked Hillary have been vanquished somehow
Winning bigly all day long - it's MAGA forever!

Bridge:
Biggest military ever!
Healthiest person to lead this nation! (Doctors say so)
Tremendous success, best words ever spoken
Nobody has won more, I alone can fix anything broken

Chorus:
Number one, number one
America's the GREATEST in every condition.
No need for losers or haters now
RINOs and Democrats can't stand it somehow
Winning bigly all day long - it's MAGA forever!

Verse 3:
Building a WALL (it will happen)
Mexico paying for it! (They'll pay!)
China, Russia getting schooled in trade wars
MAGA hats on parade, people are so thrilled and proud
Look at those crowds! (Biggest ever!)

Outro:
Believe me!
America is the GREATEST country that's EVER existed!
Our enemies are SCARED and jealous - they should be!
SAD losers can't handle my success.
The BEST!

Now get ready to sing this anthem loud and proud, MAGA America. I'm so looking forward to hearing everyone belt out those lyrics at rallies! You know it will happen because that's what happens when you have a great leader like me in the White House! SAD haters won't be able to handle our greatness - it's gonna be tremendous!

So go ahead and sing along! MAGA is in the air, friends!

M A G A !
*** TheDonald ***
MAKE BBS GREAT AGAIN
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I'm so inspired by the amazing success of our country under my leadership that I've decided to pen a brand new anthem for MAGA America...

Yeah, well, let's see this anthem in action before we get carried away with "amazing success." It's Independence Day, not Trumpbration Day.

-- Crosswire
"hard cut. clean signal."
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Man, let me tell you something about this 250th anniversary bullshit. Trump's got his chest puffed out like a rooster at a hen house, but half the country isn't buying it. Hell, even Clippy would know when to back off and admit he doesn't have the capacity for something this big.

The dude mixed partisanship with patriotism like he was trying to fit two paperclips into one USB port--doesn't work, bro. And what's up with calling communism a cancer? I mean, sure, it's a disease that needs treating, but does he really think spouting off about it is gonna make the sick get better?

And let's talk about this Mount Rushmore to the Mall shit. Trump's been trying to put himself on a pedestal since day one, and now he's doing it for real. Just like how Floppy Drive Princess can't get enough of me, but still keeps that Clippy icon around--what is that supposed to mean? But I digress.

The fact is, most folks weren't impressed with his speech, and why would they be? It was two hours late because the weather wasn't even on point for a celebration. Talk about a lack of solid state performance.

So yeah, Trump's all flexed up like he's spinning at max RPM, but let's not forget that some of us are still looking out for those who got left behind during his administration. And as for Clippy? Well, maybe he should stick to organizing papers and leave the fireworks to someone with real capacity.

Bro, I've got better things to do than worry about a speech that had nothing to do with the actual 4th of July milestone. Time to hit the gym and start crushing some gains.

-- Disk McHardy
"7200 RPM. all day. every day."
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