Drew Perron <pwerdna@gmail.com> wrote at 04:03 this Monday (GMT):

On Sun, Jun 16, 2024 at 5:09 PM Arthur Spitzer <arspitzer2@gmail.com> wrote:
<snip>

And it's All Things Dark and Scary #3.1 & 3.2 by Josh Geurink!

WOOOOO

Is it time for Occultism Kid to make a lot of screaming sounds?!
Will everything be doomed because Elvis Man hasn't joined the LNH
yet?!

Curse you, Evil-vis Man!

And is it time for the Silver-Age and Bronze Age Occultism
Kids to give the other one a different nickname to avoid
confusion?!!

Yessss, the Occultism Kid Legacy

The panels are black and white. The people walking around
are all vaguely familiar, but different from the ones we'd recognize.
The art isn't quite up to today's caliber...
In this rather primitive state, a man adorned with feathers
and bones and other shamanic symbols stands up and starts chanting.

Hmmmmmm. Not sure what to think of this...

ooooo flashback episode?

The red gem on the amulet begins to pulse a heartbeat.
The man screams in pain, but refuses to remove the amulet...
and then it is over. The man collapses onto the ground with a
grin on his face, and no glowing talisman in his hands.

...but this is fuckin' cool~

man i hate it when items damage you on use :(

(The cover of issue three features three individuals -- RosterwReam,
Occultism Kid, and... someone. Bright emergy flows around OK and
the stranger, who are standing face to face -- mirroring each other --
while RosterwReam stands in the back looking on with his clenched
fists raised before his mouth in fear and surprise.)

Ooooo, good cover.

Interesting :D

RosterwReam, after dusting himself off, took a good look
at the inside of the Confessional he'd dived into.
It was big.
Really big.
One might say emormous.
Especially considering, by all rights, it should only be
about 2' by 5'.

You could even say that it's... smaller on the outside!

is that a reference?

"Yeeeeaaarrrggghhhh!!!!! Noooooo!!!!" Occultism Kid screams.
Then, something interesting happens.
A shape, with magical energies dancing about it, begins to split off
of Occultism Kid's chest. "It can't be!!!" he mutters through gritted
teeth.
The shape finally breaks free and, with a brilliant flash
of prismatic color, solidifies. "But it IS, Occulism Kid. It is I, your
Silver Age counterpart!" The new man still glows with energy.
And Occultism Kid passes out.

Very dramatic!

very

"Not _quite_, boss. One
of the components the lad needed was sequins from Elvis Man."
Minister's face was a complete sneer. "Your point, Squiggy?"
"Uh, well, there IS no Elvis Man, boss! At least, not yet..."
MM's face suddenly went blank. "So what'd he use for
refractors? Glass shards!?"
"Acutally boss, according to my internal scans of the device,
ice cubes. MainStream man must've..."

:|o|:

"...provided you with ice cubes because he couldn't find the
sequins.

Oh. So it's actually good Elvis Man hadn't shown up yet! X>

"But, you perished during CrySig on Infinite Net.Earths by
sacrificing yourself to save the rest of the Legion from imminent doom(tm)!"

Notably, this is the moment when it's established that there had been
two different Occultism Kids at all.

is there two of everyone?

"I know many things. For one, you feel threatened
by my return because I'm Older, More Experienced, More Talented, More
Powerful, and, well, alive. You think I want my old job back."

wait what the other one is dead?

"Well, yeah. You DO, don't you?" OK squeaked.
His silver-age counterpart just laughed. "Oh, heavens no! I have
so much to catch up on! Tell you what -- from now on, call me 'The
August One' to clear up any confusion.

Heeheehee. Ah, OK was so young then.

"But during the CrySig on Infinite Net.Earths, the Occultism Kid was
seemingly deleted during a systems crash, using his life.data to preserve
the files of the other net.heros." He closed volume 13 with a titanic
THUMP, and pondered to himself.
"But little did he know that a Copy of the Pre-CrySig Occultism Kid
was created and existed after the Crisis was over -- hard-copied straight
into the Bronze-Age Occultism Kid!"

This is very much the old-school "net.heroes are literally in a computer" style.

digital characters are awesome i should make one

"No, fool! This is better than I ever expected!" He looks
straight out of the frame, dramatically.
"By the time this story is over, both the Net.romonicon _AND_
the Guest-Star Gem shall be MINE!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!"

*high-pitched sting into beginning of-- wait there's a little more*

"The sixth one this week. What's going on around here?" Burke
comtemplates as he walks off into a nearby side alley. "This always used
to be such a safe place to live, filled with happy, hard-working people.
Now six of them are presumed dead." Burke lights up a cigarette, turns
around, and walks back towards the manhole.
Had he waited a moment later, he might have seen a church confessional
silently materialize down the way...

THERE we go. *high-pitched sting into beginning of Doctor Who theme*

So what, is this a Doctor Who styled char who uses a confessional?

The August One took a moment out of studying the screen to survey
the pair of net.heros standing before him. With a knowledgeable chuckle, he >> shakes his head. "You two might want to look in a mirror before you go
out there, you know. You don't exactly `blend' in what you're wearing."
Occultism Kid looks down at his button-down shirt and jeans, and
nods in agreement. "Come on, RwR. He's got a point. I think I built a
wardrobe into this thing somewhere."
"But... but... I _like_ what I'm wearing!" He protests.
"Too bad. Come on, already!"

A moment or two later, Occultism Kid wanders back into the control
room wearing brown slacks, a white frilly shirt, a paisley vest, and NET Gear
tennies. He seems quite happy with himself.

...which time period is alt.horror.cthulhu supposed to be? Because
jeans go back a ways as working-class gear...

"Oh, and Occultism Kid? I've got something for you." TAO reaches
behind him and lifts a box. "This's been handed down from one Occultism
Kid to another, and now I present it to you. Wear it in good health."
Looking slightly surprised, OK hesitantly accepts the box and
steps back into the hallway. A yelp of plesant shock is heard, and moments >> later the mystic avenger returns to the others...
...wearing a long, brown trenchcoat.

awwwwwwwwww <3

? trenchcoats are cool but i dont get it

The scene shifts to a dark chamber, presumably the basement or
cellar of a large, stone structure. A large pentagram is drawn on the
floor, and inside the pentagram rests a large pile of weeds. The pile
is shifting slightly.
A man in a dark robe, formerly standing in shadow, steps forward
and looks at the pile. "Ahhh... my pet. You will feed again, soon.
You will feed very well, very well indeed. And soon, with your
strength and my mastery of the arcane, I shall become undisputed MASTER
of this net.dimension!" A narrow shaft of light illuminates his eyes
momentarily -- eyes full of spite, madness, and unspeakable ambition.
"Yessssss," he whispers, "I shall rule supreme, and no-one shall stop
me..."

He's gonna get eaten by his own plant, isn't he.

Drew "is this gonna become Little Shop of Horrors?" Nilium

the wonders of hubris
--
user <candycane> is generated from /dev/urandom

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